They get to sign girls' chests:
Strand: Welcome to Canada, boys. Were they gentle at the border, with the body cavity search, I mean?
Dave: They were really gentle. We didn't even realise it had happened.
Steve: Dave's actually got a pretty extensive record, but he's safely across now.
Strand: How nice to hear. I'd like to talk about this time last year - you were touring with the Strokes?
Steve: The U.S. tour with the Strokes was a magical time. We did the southern part of the U.S., playing in front of a thousand plus people a night. It was the first tour where we were consistently meeting the fans, signing autographs. And while it was going on we were being courted by several major labels, so it was really great.
Strand: When you were in the UK, did you find there was any backlash to being associated with the Strokes?
Steve: Why would we? They deify them over there.
Strand: Yeah, the Brit kids love them, but the press can be very 'flavour of the month.'
Steve: Basically any band the Strokes put their seal of approval on, everyone listens to. There were a couple of reviews saying we were trying to sound like the Strokes, which is absurd 'cause we sound pretty far off. We're just friends that tour together.
Strand: If anything, a similar sound is a reason not to tour with a band.
Steve: Definitely.
Strand: Now that you guys are based out of New York City do you think that it had influenced the music?
Dave: I think we've influenced New York City with our sound (intense laughter from the rest of the band) A lot of bands used to sound garage-y, now you'll find there's a band called Interpol...so yeah, we've influenced them.
Shannon: Wasn't it Dave Mustaine who said, "I'd at least like a greeting card from Pantera, because they ripped me off so bad"?
Strand: So when did you record this album New York bands love to emulate?
Steve: The festivals were right in the middle of making the record. We had to switch around some studio time in order to go to the festivals.
Dave: Yeah, it was right around the time New York bands started sounding like us.
Steve: When would you pin that? Around May? April?
Dave: About April, around your birthday, I think.
Strand: How did you work through that recording schedule?
Steve: Two weeks on, two weeks off. We worked out of upstate New York, about forty-five minutes from Buffalo.
Strand: You just finished touring with The Donnas...
Shannon: Wait, you missed the Vines tour.
Mike: Don't you want to talk about the Vines?
Strand: Alright, we can talk about the Vines.
Dave: We toured with them in Europe. In Germany they call us Langevella
Mike/Shannon/Steve: (repeating mantra-like) Lange-vella.
Dave: Germany fuckin' loves us. I don't know how you spell our name, but it's written in those German letters.
Strand: Did you get some Umlauts with that?
The band contemplates, decides 'yes'-'no'-'maybe'...
Dave: We saw a church that got totally fuckin' destroyed...
Strand: Do you have any idea how this interview is gonna look on paper?
Steve: OK never mind about the church - ask us another question.
Strand: Alright. Tell me about the Vines tour, since you're so insistent.
Dave: Germany loved us, France loved us...
Steve: Oh stop, you're coming off like a...
Shannon: Germany really loved Dave. Dave, don't be modest.
Strand: How are the German chicks?
Dave: They're cute. They ride bicycles everywhere in Europe.
Steve: They've got great asses.
Strand: Of course, it's good for the glutes.
Dave: It really is, it's really nice. Everyone in Europe is beautiful.
(at this point Shannon, sensing the interview may not be going so well, grabs the recorder. The following is his monologue)
Shannon: Hey, what's up. Longwave started in the summer of 1999. Steve Shultz moved from Rochester to New York City, with a couple of songs in his back pocket searching for a backup band. After many lineups....okay, you go ahead.
All: come on, ask us another question....
Strand: No, I'm gonna allow this.
Shannon: I swear I'll give you a serious answer. It'll be the most serious answer all day.
Strand: The next question is about the Donnas. If you had a good time on tour, if they treated you right, etcetera.
All: Yes.
Dave: They're very gentle, and meek...
Mike: They keep to themselves.
Steve: They seemed a little aloof at first, and I think it's because they get a lot of creeps trying to hit on them and get them in bed.
Strand: I think I know some of those creeps.
Steve: Yeah, they get asked "Take me to the Backseat," and get asked to "Take it Off" a lot.
Shannon: But it's "On the Rocks" with them.
Steve: Right. But they were very nice to us and when our van broke down they and Ok Go transported our equipment from show to show for us.
Strand: So they don't really do "40 Boys in 40 Nights?"
Mike: They don't do anything of the sort.
Strand: I'm sorry to hear that.
Mike: They smoke a small amount of pot.
Strand: If your drummer lost an arm, would you pull the Def Leppard
Steve: Yes.
Strand: So you'd wait until Mike had mastered an intricate series of foot pedals?
Mike: I wouldn't do it.
Steve: Whatever he wanted to do
Shannon: We'd move him to lead vocal.
Steve: Yes, and I'd play drums
Shannon: I think the point is Mike is much more important as a band member than a drummer. He's a great songwriter and a great musician.
Strand: There was actually a show on Canadian television called "Catwalk" in which they had a guy, Atlas, who did nothing but dance.
Steve: We could do that.
Shannon: I'll read a question. I really like you, I think you're super-cool.
Strand: That's great.
Shannon: What's the question? Ah. Steve - We're releasing "Tidal Wave" as a single. Have we done the video yet?
Steve: No we have not done the video yet. We have a few ideas for it, particularly making it better than the "Everywhere You Turn" video. Shannon, your thoughts?
Shannon: We're currently deciding on the director.
Strand: The "Everywhere You Turn" video features mannequins, a pretty standard theme in videos. Have you considered moving on to midgets?
Steve: We didn't want to alienate any audience, any small contingent.
Strand: So you feel you may have quite a midget following?
Steve: Perhaps if we don't alienate them.
Dave: (to Steve) It's funny, I did bring this up to you once. There's a 70's midget wrestler named Sky Lo-Lo, he wore a cape, he was bald, he's incredible. He should be in the video.
Strand: I think Gene Simmons once said that he hated the movie Spinal Tap because it was too close to the truth. Noel Gallagher said that all you need to do is watch it to know about the Rock 'n' Roll lifestyle. Now that you've been on tour for a while, would you agree with that statement?
Steve: In a way. Then again you have to factor in that you're stuck in a van for hours and hours on end. When other people get sick, you get sick, too. Your eating schedule is very erratic and unhealthy. And you get to sign girls' chests.
Strand: I'm gonna wrap it up. What can we expect from the show tonight?
Steve: Fire breathing ...motorcycle stunts.
Mike: Flying cadavers.
By: Ash Keenan 02/27/03
The Strand