Various Riddles 60
1. What happens if you see twin witches?
Ans. You won't be able to see which witch is witch!
2. Why did the witch give up fortune telling?
Ans. There was no future in it!
3. Why did the baby witch smile when she came out in blotches?
Ans. Because it was an 'appy rash!
4. What does a witch get if she is a poor traveller?
Ans. Broom sick!
5. How did the witch almost lose her baby?
Ans. She didn't take it far enough into the woods!
6. Why did the stupid witch keep her clothes in the fridge?
Ans. She liked to have something cool to slip into in the evenings!
7. Where did the witch get her furniture?
Ans. From the ideal gnome exhibition!
8. Why did the witch put her broom in the wash?
Ans. She wanted a clean sweep!
9. What has six legs and flies?
Ans. A witch giving her cat a ride!
10. What has handles and flies?
Ans. A witch in a dustbin!
11. What is evil and ugly and bounces?
Ans. A witch on a trampoline!
12. Why don't angry witches ride their brooms?
Ans. They're afraid of flying off the handle!
13. What do witches put on their hair?
Ans. Scare spray
14. How does the witch know what time it is?
Ans. She looks at her witch-watch.
15. What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
Ans. Spelling!
16. What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?
Ans. She witch-hiked!
17. What does a witch kid want for Christmas?
Ans. A haunted dollhouse.
18. Why do witches wear name tags?
Ans. So, they would know which witch is which!
19. How do witches tell time?
Ans. With a witch watch.
20. What do you call two witches living together?
Ans. Broom-mates.
21. What does a witch ask for when she is in a hotel?
Ans. Broom service.
22. What did one witch say to other when she asked for a lift?
Ans. "There's always broom for one more."
23. When do witches cook their victims?
Ans. On Fry Day.
24. What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
Ans. A sand-witch.
25. What do you call a motorbike that belongs to a witch?
Ans. A brrrooooommmm stick
26. Who was the most famous witch detective?
Ans. Warlock Holmes
27. What do they teach in witching school?
Ans. Spelling.
28. Why does a witch ride a broom?
Ans. Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord.
29. What do you call a witch's garage?
Ans.cA broom closet.
30. What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?
Ans. She witch-hiked!
31. What do witches eat at Halloween ?
Ans. Spooketti, halloweenies, devils
food cake and booberry pie
32. What story do little witches like to hear at bedtime?
Ans. Ghoul deluxe and the three scares
33. How does a witch tell the time?
Ans. With a witch watch!
34. Why did the witch put her broom in the washing machine?
Ans. She wanted a clean sweep!
35. What do you call two witches that share a room?
Ans. Broom mates!
36. What noise does a witch's breakfast cereal make?
Ans. Snap, cackle and pop!
37. What is a witch with poison ivy called?
Ans. An itchy witchy!
38. What's a cold, evil candle called?
Ans. The wicked wick of the north!
39. What is evil, ugly and black and goes round and round?
Ans. A witch in a revolving door!
40. What is evil and ugly on the inside and green on the outside?
Ans. A witch dressed as a cucumber
41. What happens if you see twin witches?
Ans. You won't be able to see which witch is witch!
42. Why did the witch give up fortune telling?
Ans. There was no future in it!
43. Why did the baby witch smile when she came out in blotches?
Ans. Because it was an 'appy rash!
44. What does a witch get if she is a poor traveller?
Ans. Broom sick!
45. How did the witch almost lose her baby?
Ans. She didn't take it far enough into the woods!
46. Why did the stupid witch keep her clothes in the fridge?
Ans. She liked to have something cool to slip into in the evenings!
47. Where did the witch get her furniture?
Ans. From the ideal gnome exhibition!
48. Why did the witch put her broom in the wash?
Ans. She wanted a clean sweep!
49. What has six legs and flies?
Ans. A witch giving her cat a ride.
50. What has handles and flies?
Ans. A witch in a dustbin!
51. What is evil and ugly and bounces?
Ans. A witch on a trampoline!
52. Why was Cinderella no good at football?
Ans. Because her coach was a pumpkin.
53. Why was Cinderella no good at soccer?
Ans. Because she kept running away
from the ball
54. Which animal has the most lives?
Ans. A frog-because it croaks every night.
55. What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
Ans. It's Christmas, Eve!
56. Howdo you make an idiot laugh on boxing day?
Ans. Tell him a joke on Christmas
Eve!
57. What do you have in December that you don't have in any other month?
Ans. The letter "D"!
58. What does Father Christmas suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
Ans. Santa Claustrophobia!
59. What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve?
Ans. Black mail!
60. Who delievers cat's Christmas presents?
Ans. Santa Paws!
61. Why does Father Christmas go down the chimney?
Ans. Because it soots him!
62. Who delievers elephants's Christmas presents?
Ans. Elephanta Claus!
63. How many chimney does Father Christmas go down?
Ans. Stacks!
64. Why is Santa like a bear on Christmas Eve?
Ans. Because he's Sooty
65. What did General Patton do on Thanksgiving?
Ans. He gave tanks.
66. What's black and white and red all over?
Ans. A Pilgrim with a rash!
67. How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving?
Ans. He was very thinkful.
68. What kind of music did Pilgrim bands play?
Ans. Plymouth Rock 'n' roll!
69. What would you get if you crossed a pickle with an early New England settler?
Ans. A Dillgrim!
70. Why didn't the boy get a
second helping of turkey?
Ans. Because he ate it all the first time!
71. Why did the Pilgrim shoot the
turkey?
Ans. Because he was in a fowl mood!
72. What would you get if you crossed a
monster with a Thanksgiving dessert?
Ans. Bumpkin pie!
73. What did the boy elephant say to the girl elephant on Valentine's Day?
Ans. I love you a ton!
74. What did the boy bat say to the girl bat on Valentine's Day?
Ans. You're fun to hang around with!
75. What did the boy cat say to the girl c=
at on Valentine's Day?
Ans. You're purrr-fect for me!�
�� 76. What did the boy pickle say to the girl
pickle on Valentine's Day?
Ans. You mean a great dill to me!
77. What did the boy bird say to the girl bird on Valentine's Day?
Ans. Let me call you Tweet heart!
78. What did the boy squirrel say to the girl squirrel on Valentine's Day?
Ans. I'm nuts about you!
79.� What did the girl squirrel say to the boy squirrel on Valentine's Day?
Ans.� You're nuts so bad yourself!
80. What did the boy rabbit say to the girl rabbit on Valentine's Day?
Ans. Somebunny likes you.
81. How can you tell a vampire likes baseball?
Ans. Every night he turns into a bat.
82. What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
Ans. It's a pain in the neck.
83.How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
Ans. All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.
84. How does a girl vampire flirt?
Ans. She bats her eyes.
85. Why doesn't anybody like Dracula?
Ans. He has a bat temper.
86. Who does Dracula get letters from?
Ans. His fang club.
87. Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
Ans. To stop his coffin.
88. How do you keep a monster from biting his nails?
Ans. Give him screws.
89. What can't you give the headless horseman?
Ans. A headache
90. Why did the headless horseman go into business?
Ans. He wanted to get ahead in life.
91. Where does a ghost go on vacation?
Ans. Mali-boo.
92. What do you call two witches living together?
Ans. Broommates.
93. What do you call a witch's garage?
Ans. A broom closet.
94. Why does a witch ride a broom?
Ans. The Vacuum cleaner's poweer is cord it too short.
95. What do they teach in witching school?
Ans. Spelling.
96. Why don't mummies take vacations?
Ans. They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.
97. Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
Ans. Because demons are a ghouls best friend
98. Why did the ghost go into the bar?
Ans. For the Boos
99. What kind of dog does Dracula have?
Ans. A Bloodhound
100. What do you give a vampire with a cold?
Ans. Coffin Drops!