26. What do you call someone who eats her father's sister?
Ans. An aunt-eater.
27. Whatdo you call a person who runs an ice cream truck?
Ans. a sundae driver.
28. hat do you call a person who is fed up with people?
Ans. A cannibal.
29. Why did the orange stop in the middle of the road?
Ans. It ran out of juice.
30. What makes heat waves?
Ans. A hot ocean.
31. What day of the year is an order to move forward?
Ans. March Fourth.
32. What did one light bulb say to the other light bulb?
Ans. People turn me on.
33. What's the biggest ant in the world?
Ans. Giant.
34. Why are matches poor friends?
Ans. They are hotheads.
35. What gets wetter the more it dries?
Ans. A towel.
36. What kind of paper do you use to make a kite?
Ans. Flypaper.
37. What is pointed in one direction and headed in the other?
Ans. A nail.
38. When spanked by a father and a mother who hurts most?
Ans. The one being spanked.
39. What did the beaver say to the tree?
Ans. It's been nice gnawing you.
40. Why do fish perspire?
Ans. To make the sea salty.
41. Where can you always find money?
Ans. The dictionary.
42. What has a head and a foot but can't think or walk?
Ans. A hill.
43. Where do frogs sit at mealtime?
Ans. Toadstools.
44. What do you get if you take half from a half dollar?
Ans. A dollar.
45. What is the best day for a picnic?
Ans. A Sun-day.
46. What eight letter word has only one letter in it?
Ans. Envelope.
47. What was the little horse unhappy?
Ans. If he wanted something his mother always said neigh.
48. Why should you never gossip in a stable?
Ans. All horses carry tails.
49. What did the jack say to the car?
Ans. Can I give you a lift?
50. What is the principal part of a horse?
Ans. The mane part.
51. What did the horse say to the rider?
Ans. Get off my back.
52. Why is a bull in a house like fire?
Ans. The sooner it is put out the better.
53. Why did the farmer feed his cow money?
Ans. He wanted rich milk.
54. What would you get if you cross a cow and a turtle?
Ans. A turtlenecked jersey.
55. What is the best cure for insomnia?
Ans. A good night's sleep.
56. Why is the letter d dangerous?
Ans. It makes ma mad.
57. How can you keep mild from getting sour?
Ans. Keep it in the cow.
58. Why did the lobster blush?
Ans. He saw the salad dressing.
59. What would you do if you found Chicago Ill?
Ans. Call Baltimore MD.
60. Where would you go to see a man eating fish?
Ans. In a seafood restaurant.
61. When did the Irish potato change nationality?
Ans. When it became French fried.
62. Why did the little boy take milk and sugar to the movie?
Ans. He heard they had a new serial (cereal).
63. What did the hat say to the scarf?
Ans. You hang around here while I go on a head.
64. What do you call a bunch of bees?
Ans. A good report card.
65. What is the day after George Washington's birthday?
Ans. George Birthington's wash day.
66. On what kind of horse would you get wet when riding?
Ans. A sea horse.
67. Why did the giant get lost?
Ans. His head was always in the clouds.
68. What does a 300 pound mouse say?
Ans. Here Kitty Kitty.
69. What is red, white, and blue with red dots?
Ans. Uncle Sam with the measles.
70. Why did the bee go to the doctor?
Ans. It had hives.
71. What did Tennessee?
Ans. The same thing Arkansas.
72. Why is a good resolution like a looking glass?
Ans. It is so easily broken.
73. What did the baby sardine say when he saw a submarine?
Ans. Look! There goes a can of people.
74. What is a pig doing when he eats?
Ans. Making a hog of himself.
75. What side of a apple is the left side?
Ans. The side that hasn't been eaten yet.
76. Why are different trees like different dogs?
Ans. Each has a different bark.
77. What divides by uniting and unites by dividing?
Ans. Scissors.
78. How does a hot dog speak?
Ans. Frankly.
79. What happened to the boy who swallowed a spoon?
Ans. He couldn't stir.
80. What has its heart in its head?
Ans. Lettuce.
81. What kinds of animals can jump higher than a house?
Ans. All kinds of animals, houses can't jump.
82. What makes everyone sick except those who swallow it?
Ans. Flattery.
83. What goes oom oom?
Ans. A cow walking backwards.
84. How did King Kong excape from his cage?
Ans. He used a monkey wrench.
85. How can you cure yourself from sleep walking?
Ans. Sprinkle thumbtacks on your bed.
86. How can you tell a dogwood?
Ans. By its bark.
87. Why should you never have a short walking stick?
Ans. It cannot belong to you.
88. When you look around on a cold day what do you see on every hand?
Ans. Fingers.
89. What kind of break from work do ghosts take?
Ans. Coffin break.
90. What is the favorite holiday of vampires?
Ans. Fangsgiving.
91. What kind of boat does a vampire ride in?
Ans. A blood vessel.
92. What is green on the inside and white on the outside?
Ans. A frog sandwich.
93. What songs do frying pans sing?
Ans. Home on the Range.
94. What has 18 legs and catches flies?
Ans. A baseball team.
95. What do you get when a bird gets caught in a lawn mower?
Ans. Shredded tweet.
96. What did the hot dog say when it crossed the finish line?
Ans. I'm a weiner.
97. What band of underwear does ing Tut like best?
Ans. Fruit Of the Tomb.
98. What do you call a rabbit with a lot of fleas?
Ans. Bugs Bunny.
99. Why is a person's nose always in the middle of his face?
Ans. It is the scenter.
100. Hos did the firefly feel when he ran into a fan?
Ans. He was delighted.
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