Mac Tire � Son of the EarthPart 25 � DecisionsThere is no rainfall in Egypt. The land and its people rely on the Inundation or Akhet which occurs in June when the dog star Sirius appears in the sky. The Nile floods (melted ice from the mountains and high places) and the land is fertile again. In former times if the Akhet failed, the crops could not be planted and the people starved. (see Joseph interpreting Pharaoh's dreams, Genesis. The Bible.) There were three seasons in Ancient Egypt. Akhet - the Inundation, Peret - the Growing, and Shemet - the Harvest. Hapi - god of fertility. Mehet-Weret goddess of the flood Lij was sitting on a seat in a remote part of the ramparts of the keep. He had planted a little garden there, carrying the soil up from the ground level himself, and making little stone-edged islands against the sheltering wall, begging seedlings and plants from those who kept gardens both at the keep and in the duns. In the ten weeks that had passed since Dom's marriage to Ede, Lij had spent many hours there, planting, weeding and nurturing. It took his mind off things....off Dom. For this was his special place. Lij had formally asked for it, and the Ard-Ri had consented, ordering that no-one go there and disturb Lij's quiet moments. Nobody knew better than Dom how much solace Lij obtained from his gardens at home. So the door was locked, and only Lij had the key. Lij had to escape sometimes. Orla was safe, far away from Ede's cruel hands, but Lij missed her. There was no-one in the keep with whom he felt such an affinity. Orla had made him smile. He liked Cass very much, but he was spending more and more time with Brian as their relationship deepened. Besides that, he was the king's man, and knew where his duty lay. And although Cormac was a dear man - loving and sweet and gentle - he was not Dom. Lij needed both to think of Dom and to escape from thoughts of Dom. Cormac had not complained when Lij refused to move into his room. Lij said that sometimes he liked to sleep alone. Cormac knew this had never been true when Lij had slept with Dom in his arms, but it was true now, and that was good enough for Cormac, whose love for Lij was far above such petty considerations. Lij's new room was at the end of a long corridor far away from both Cormac and Dom. Lij was not sorry. For Dom had refused to see Lij in private. Not once since the marriage had they been alone together. There was always someone present, whether they were eating, talking or listening to Dom or Cormac play. Even when Lij told Dom the joyful news that a daughter had been born to him in Egypt, Ede and Cormac were there. Dom gravely inclined his head to Lij in acknowledgement of the news, wisely keeping his thankful heart from showing in his face. Ede, puzzled, had asked how a dream could bring such knowledge. Lij was about to answer when Dom interrupted. "It is a mystery Lij is not allowed to divulge," he said, staring at Lij with a message in his eye. Lij was far from stupid. He held his peace. Not that Dom showed any sign whatsoever that Lij was still beloved by him. He hid behind formal phrases and stilted conversations when they met. Lij missed Dom's smile. He missed Dom's caresses. He missed Dom. Lij sometimes wondered if, indeed, Dom had fallen out of love with him, now Dom was married to Ede Lij sighed and turned down his lamp. The dog-star Sirius was shining overhead but soon the sun would break in the east, and Lij had his duty to perform. It was solely through his interaction with the gods that the Nile flooded, bringing life to Egypt. He was, at this time, the personification of the god Hapi, who came down to earth and mated with the goddess Mehet-Weret to fertilize the land. He stripped off his clothing and folded them neatly on the seat. * At the other end of the keep Dom was staring out of his bedroom window into the pre-dawn sky whilst his wife snored gently in bed. His heart was heavy because soon Lij would be gone and Dom would not even have the consolation of seeing him every day as he contrived to do now. There would be nothing ahead of Dom in this life except loneliness and duty. Suddenly he saw the light flicker on the ramparts and knowing it was Lij in his little garden, understood that he must see him alone one last time before he was gone from his life forever. Silently he dressed and creeping across the room, opened the door. * Lij raised his arms above his head, palms together, and closed his eyes. He was inviting the god Hapi to use him as his instrument. Slowly, Lij began to turn. His arms measured the cool morning air, and as the sun showed its rosy edge over the horizon, Dom unlatched the door. He realised immediately what was happening. Had he not observed Lij perform the ritual every year for nearly a decade? It was the sacred dance of the Invocation of Hapi that brought the Akhet to bless the land. He shrank back into the shadow of the thick stone arch surrounding the sturdy wooden door, and stared at Lij with pride. He has counted the days. Lij has counted the days. Egypt's Little Father has not forgotten his duty Dom smiled although there was no-one to see it. Lij. His beautiful Lij - Son of the Sun. The Nile would flood this year; Dom felt it in his bones. Lij was moving faster, now, his hands supplicating the gods, his body moving to internal rhythms no one could hear but him. His sweating skin glowed in the pale light. Suddenly amongst the ritualised motions of the dance Dom saw something which was not part of the ceremony. Lij cupped one hand and placed the other upon the heel of it like a flame. It was one of their secret love signals. It meant, "I am yours." Swiftly after this came one that meant "I love you. I desire you above all others." Dom held his breath, but quickly realised that Lij had no idea he was present. He breathed again. Then Lij gave the "make love with me" sign, and Dom bit the side of his hand, the tears tracking unchecked down his face. Lij arched his back. The god Hapi had taken possession of him and Dom saw that his beloved was fully erect. The goddess Mehet would soon be fertilised with his seed. Dom's heart filled with joy at the sight of his love transported with ecstasy in the dance. No-one moved him thus except Lij. The risen sun burst from behind a cloud and fell on Lij who lifted his face to its radiance. He stopped moving and stretched out his arms wide, embracing its warmth, rapt in his moment of communion with the gods. Dom looked down and saw Lij thrust his hips forward as the milky ribbons spurted from Lij's body and fell on the freshly tended earth. Then Lij did something Dom had never seen him do before. Gracefully bending his pliant body, he kissed the brand of the harp that was his love token to Dom. Really kissed it, as if it were indeed Dom. Dom's eyes clouded with tears, and he saw no more. By the time Dom had composed himself, Lij had dressed, and was ready to leave. Dom stayed where he was - he would speak one private word to Lij even if the world ended because of it. Lij moved towards the door and stopped dead when he saw who was standing in the aperture. He put his head to one side and waited for Dom to speak. Dom saw the paleness of Lij's skin; the sheen of sweat drying there, the dark circles under his eyes. He knew the effort that Lij gladly invested in maintaining his stewardship over his domain and his obligations to his people. His heart was full with the joy of him. So full he could not speak. "I beg you will excuse me, my lord king, but, as you know, I have fasted for two days and prayed all night, and now I must rest." Lij bowed and went to pass Dom. As his body brushed against Dom's in the narrow doorway, his former spouse leant back against the wall, his face a rictus of despair. Lij paused to look at him for a short moment, then disappeared around the bend in the staircase. "If only you knew, my Lij, how much I love you..." Dom whispered to Lij's back as the echo of his feet vanished into the morning.. Dom waited for a few moments to make sure that Lij had gone, and returned to his room. As he climbed into bed, his feet touched Ede's. He was surprised to find how cold her feet were. He pulled the thick fur coverlet over her legs, and closed his eyes. Ede turned towards him and rested her head on his breast. Her breath was warm against his cool skin. * Lij opened the door to his room wearily. Porphyry, who was drowsing in a chair, got lazily to his feet as Lij came in and asked "What is it you require, master?" Lij sighed, irritable with fatigue. Nekeb would have known, and had it all ready and waiting. "I need something light to break my fast and a warm drink. I am cold, now." Indeed, now that the fire of the god had departed from him, Lij felt cold and vulnerable again. When he had seen Dom on the ramparts the god still sparkled in his flesh. Now he wished he had taken advantage of the moment and kissed Dom, even though Dom had remained silent. His thoughts of Dom were interrupted by his servant returning with a wing of fowl left over from last night's dinner and a beaker of warm milk, sweetened with honey and sprinkled with cinnamon - another luxury from the East Lij thought as he drank it slowly down. He ate two bites of the chicken before weariness overcame him. "Go, I must sleep!" he ordered the man who bowed low and left without a word. * The Ard-Ri was in the Great Hall dispensing justice and listening to an old lord's complaints against another lord he claimed had stolen his land. It was late in the afternoon and he was tired. Dom had slept little the night before and he had dispensed with the midday meal to finish the business of the Feis which had threatened to stretch over a fourth day. Consequently, when Lij arrived holding Cormac's hand, the feelings of jealousy and despair he usually covered so well in Lij's presence threatened to burst out. Ede, who had been absent for a few hours now returned to the room, and as she walked towards her seat beside Dom she was shocked to see his face as he looked on Lij and Cormac. Dom was angry. She sat down without a word and gazed benignly on the couple before her. "Welcome, Egypt and Cormac to the court of the Feis. Have you a dispute you wish the High-King to settle, or something for the seanachie to include in the annals of history?" Before Lij could marshal his thoughts to speak, Cormac bowed low. "Indeed, lady, I have, so. I wish it to be recorded that I have taken Knefer-Lijedefer of Egypt as my bond-mate." Dom snorted, and Lij's eyes flew up to the king's face. "You are displeased, lord king?" Lij asked in a voice as sharp as a razor. "Not at all, Great Egypt. I give you joy of your choice. May your life be long together. " Dom could not help the bitterness that edged his voice. Lij bowed his head in slight acknowledgement. "As may yours be with the spouse of your heart." The emphasis on the last word was heavy and very deliberate. The air crackled between them with words unspoken. Dom's hand rose before he knew what he was doing and slashed the air between them in a gesture of repudiation. Quickly, Dom recollected himself and spoke, "My wife, the kind soul that she is, informs me she has received a message today brought by a cloth merchant from the harbour. The Phoenician trader has landed. He will be here within the month. You will not have to wait long to return to your homeland and loved ones." Lij's eyes sparked cold blue flame. Cormac, staring at his chosen partner, thought he had never seen him look so beautiful, or so deadly. "I thank you and your lady for this news. I shall prepare myself for the captain's arrival and thus my return home, together with my future bond-mate." Dom breathed deeply. His feelings threatened to overcome him. Ede could not be allowed see how moved he was by the thought of losing Lij. The longer Lij stayed in front of him with that proud look, so beautiful, the more Dom felt his control slipping away. "I shall be glad to see you gone from this place," he said, holding the arms of his chair with white-knuckled fingers and hating every word that issued from his mouth. A lie it was, and yet, not. Lij recoiled as though he had been struck. Never had Dom spoken to him in such terms or in such a tone. Lij bowed slowly, "In truth, I shall be glad to be gone. You will excuse us, lord king. I am tired, and have slept little and eaten less. If you require our presence later, you will find us in Cormac's room. If you send the merchant who brought the message to us, tell him to be prepared to wait. We will be much occupied." Lij grasped Cormac's hand again and gave it a comforting squeeze. "Come, muh chree, I have need of you," Lij said clearly. It was obvious both Ede and Dom heard this remark. Dom's face was white with anger. "You have my leave," he said curtly, waving his hand in dismissal. Both Lij and Cormac bowed low, and hand in hand left the room. Dom was silent for a few moments, aching to call Lij back to explain all things and fighting the jealousy that rose within him but when Ede put her hand on his arm, he called the next person awaiting his judgement to the throne. The Ard-Ri had responsibilities to his people above all else. Outside the doors, Lij released Cormac's hand and turning his partner examined the young man's face carefully. In it there was no trace of jealousy or any expression that hinted of guile. Cormac touched Lij's face gently. "It is my hope that one day I will make you happy, my love....that you will come to love me as you still love Dom. When you are home, in Egypt, perhaps..." Lij took Cormac's hand again. "You are a kind soul, Cormac. I do not deserve such devotion." Cormac shook his head. "Yes, you do. I love you, you see." They went to Cormac's room, and no-one was sent to disturb their love-making that night. * Ede was pacing Lij's old bed-chamber. She had spoken curtly with Neeve and sent her off to finish some task she had in hand. Alone she waited for Dom to finish with the minor kings and come to her bed. The rushes were burning low when he arrived, and she had replaced them twice. She wanted to talk and Dom needed to listen. He arrived holding a bottle of the Samian wine, and was very drunk. Ede was surprised, she had never seen Dom in such a state before. He despised drunkenness. He often remarked scathingly of it in others. He leaned against the connecting door and waved the bottle at her. "Want some?" he slurred, drinking from it, spilling the liquid down the new lawn shirt she had had made for him. It was embroidered with shamrocks and heathers around hem and neck and had taken six women two months to compete. Now it was ruined. Anger rose in her. "A fine example to the other lords, you are, great king!" she spat at him. "First you ogle your former spouse - that little, weedy man - in my presence, and now you come into my chamber as drunk as a pig. What use will you be to me tonight? And I need you, Sean. I am burning for you!" Dom laughed at her. It was not a pleasant sound. "Well, burn away, Ede. Tonight�tonight, I sleep alone, woman.� He went to shut the door, but she stopped him by wedging her foot in the aperture and following him into his room. "Well, a stor, if you are too drunk to rise to the occasion you can use your mouth on me. I need to come off," she said crudely, throwing off her night robe and lying on the bed, legs apart. Dom leant against the wall, his face filled with scorn. "You disgust me, Ede. There is no grace in you, none." He drank again, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Lij has more grace in his little finger..." She bounced off the bed and rushing at Dom, slapped him hard across the face. "Do not speak of him when I am in your bed! Soon he will be gone, and you will never see him again!" She clung onto his clothing in an effort to make him see the truth of her words. Dom put the bottle down and removed Ede's hands from his body none too gently. He shook his head. "No, you are wrong. I�ll do my duty here until I see the country settled. Then I will go to Egypt to find my love and...my child. Do you not understand that Lij is my soul? That I love him above everything? That he is more precious to me than my life? Do you not see, Ede?" He swayed against the wall. "When he is gone he will be safe..." he murmured as the wine took hold of him. "I will be glad when he is gone, for he will be safe...all I ever wanted�him safe." He slid down the wall and began snoring loudly. Ede pulled her robe back on and went out in the corridor and shouted for assistance. Two servants rushed in and Ede pointed to Dom with a shaking finger. "Undress the king and put him to bed. He had taken too freely of the wine," she smiled, not without effort. Appearing calm when rage boiled inside her took all of her skills. "He will not remember much of this night when he wakes in the morning. I shall retire to my chamber. I leave him in your gentle hands." The two men bowed as she left. In her own room, she leaned on the door breathing heavily. Suddenly a thought came to her. She walked to her chest and pulled out a warm cloak. Lij will be safe when he leaves, Sean said. I will have Sean to myself when he is gone. She was still smiling when, an hour later, she climbed into her bed. She could hear Dom snoring through the walls. Let him sleep she thought. In the morning, it begins! |