By Sandra Hedin
Here comes the pounding of those overbearing drums again
Here comes the laughter of the demons always wanting to win
Here comes the pain, here comes the rage, here comes insanity
Here comes the sadness, the confusion, the fragility
I thought I saw a light just a little further down,
But it's illusory, it held me there to make me drown
Now I can't breathe, now I can't think, now I'm just terrified
Now I feel sick, now I feel weak, now I feel dead inside
Why must I always go back to this familiar horrid place?
Why must those cold dark hands find me for another embrace?
Here comes the pounding of those overbearing drums again
Here comes the laughter of the demons always wanting to win
Here comes the pain, here comes the rage, here comes insanity
Here comes the sadness, the confusion, the fragility
I thought I saw a light just a little further down,
But it's illusory, it held me there to make me drown
Now I don't know which way to go, is it down or up?
I just can't tell, I just don't know, everything's getting rough
Why am I always lost and trying to get out of this?
Why do I always fall back and plunge into this deep abyss?
Here comes the pounding of those overbearing drums again
Here comes the laughter of the demons always wanting to win
Here comes the pain, here comes the rage, here comes insanity
Here comes the sadness, the confusion, the fragility
I thought I saw a light just a little further down,
But it's illusory, it held me there to make me drown
I will swim and swim until I see the light get closer
I will try and try and drain myself of all the moisture
I will be tired, I will be sore, I'll be completely drained
This I must do, this I won't stop, as long as the light remains....
***
"Night of Light"
By Sandra Hedin
Beautiful fireflies dance in the night
Tiny little orbs that give off such light
The waves lap, the wind sighs
It all comes together and seems to bind
This is not something I thought I could have
A sliver of peace is all I can grab
The forest is alight and so alive
Too much to behold, my soul cries
Not tears of sadness, tears of relief
It can all be so simple, I can let go the grief
This precious moment I wish would not end
I will keep it inside until I need it again
This beauteous night of such simplicity
Only for a moment can it be so easy
A flicker of awakening, a side not often seen
This beauty will peak, then fade like a dream
This may heal me, this night of light
Might give me the strength to continue to fight
***
"Silent Shouting"
By Sandra Hedin
Always resigned, I never mind
Can't let go, what will I find?
I will remain, you will go on
A presence here has now gone
I wince, tears well
I cry, whispered yell
Cut up and bruised
You must be amused
Slapped by wind and waves
Making time for delays
Sucked in from seduction
Biggest part of my destruction
Am I hurt? not anymore
The ocean calls, such a lure
I close my eyes, I feel the breeze
Near a cliff, on my knees
Silently shouting with the tide
As I shout, the current dies
Needing this peace close to my ocean
It�s rhythmic noise, such a potion
I close my eyes, I don't want to move
I don't want to think, what do I do?
The current flows, time passes by
Letting it out with just a sigh
I stand up, not wanting to go
How much more pain, I don't want to know.....
I close my eyes, I'll stay a bit longer
Can't I stay and continue to wander?