-
getting fatter -
What am I looking for? I prefer
women. However, I know
that there are very few female
feeders out there and the chances of finding one who is into what I am,
especially one that is local to me,
is practically nil, which is pretty frustrating. Experience in
dominant feeding is a
definate
plus. Most important is having a strong resolve and willingness
to
see it through to the end. Also, I need to be able to trust
you. You
need
to want a long-term feeding relationship and you must be obsessed with
all aspects of supersized women and love to watch someone eat and
overeat. You need to be interested in
growing a small person into your ideal fat woman.
I don't want to self-feed. There would be
little satisfaction
in making myself gain, as well as a sense of guilt; weight I gain
alone would be fat that I didn't submit to having someone else put on
me. I could probably keep putting off gaining
weight
and becoming the real me indefinately. I know my resistance might
slowly fade
over the years and, like most other people, I'll gradually gain and
spread out over
time (middle age spread?), but that's not the
best way. The sooner I get fed, the more of my life I'll get to
spend being fat. Besides, it's more meaningful to share it with
someone else. I need a dominant feeder to
step in and do what must be done, to turn me into the kind of woman you
like best-- utterly fat. Overcome my reluctance to gain--wear
down my willpower and convince me to open my mouth for your food.
Convince me to become lazy and totally let myself go.
Since I'm submissive feedee and like
helplessness,
I want you to make me fatter and flabbier. Impose it upon
me. I want to lose
all
say in the matter. I want to give control of my weight, diet, and
growth
over to my feeder, totally and irrevocably. After my initial
consent,
my
weight will be completely out of my hands. It's kind of scary to
realize that the consent may well be the last decision I ever make
about my size and my eating habits, but it's also exciting. It's
kind of like a slide: at the top I'm relatively skinny and in
control, and
at the bottom is the image of the helplessly huge woman my feeder wants
me to
become. Once I push off, I won't be able to stop or slow myself,
and I get
fatter the farther I go, sliding inexoribly towards that image until I
slide into it and it
becomes me.
One
of my deepest
desires
is to surrender the power to say 'no more'. I want to know that
once I give up control and that if my feeder sticks with it, I will
inevitably end up a waddling, jiggling
fattie no matter what. No way to back out, no escape, no way to
avoid that
fate. The very first fattening bite will start me down a path
that
you won't allow me to stray from until I'm grossly overweight. My
waistline will no longer be under my control; it would belong to
my feeder.
It's so
exciting to imagine being a helpless observer, watching in amazement
and
disbelief as my body expands around
me and starts to sag, as stretchmarks bloom, as I grow into and then
grow out of ever larger clothes, as my meals get bigger and fattier and
both my stomach and appetite grow to accomodate. I want to need
to eat more and more and feel myself become heavier and heavier even
while I feel increasingly powerless to prevent it. Every day I
imagine
what it would be like to see my tummy growing into a soft, jigging
potbelly, and continuing to swell and start to sag
under its own weight, and fold over into a tiny baby apron (and that
magical moment the first time I feel my
growing apron brush my the tops of my thighs while still standing),
what it
would feel like to get heavier all the
time, what it would be like to need to eat more and more just to get
full. I imagine what it would be like to go through the stages of
plump to fat, fat to obese, obese to supersize. What it would be
like to see rolls form on my body, deepen into permanent creases, and
form new
rolls of their own. What it would feel like to have heavy fat
hanging from every inch of my body, or to see such a body every time I
looked in the mirror. Or discovering what it
actually felt like to
have my girth prevent me from reaching some parts of my own body.
What it would be like to realize I could no longer run or even walk
fast, only plod along in a waddle.
What would it be like to be bigger than I ever imagined possible and
not want to gain any more weight, yet still
have to keep getting fatter? And
the best part would be not being able to stop any of it. My only
absolute
limit you
must
agree to is to not make me
immobile (or so close to immobile that it'd be inevitable).. I
need to be able to fend for
myself
and get around on my own, even if it's not very gracefully or as easily
as before. I don't wish to gain nonstop for life or spend the
rest of
my life in bed, nor am I going for any record-breaking size. The
purpose of the gaining is to simply make me end up as a very fat woman
and to insure that I
remain that way for life.
I want to know that I'll continue to get fatter even
after the initial thrill of the feeding wears off. I'm sure that
there will be times when I panic and
change my mind or
get scared. I might not truly believe that I
could ever end up like one of those supersize women I envy, even after
I
started to put on some weight.. but my feeder would believe.
I can imagine that starting out I might just see it
as a fun game, a new experience, an indulgence in a long time
fantasy. There may well come a point that it's no longer the
naughty thrill that it was at the beginning and I become reluctant to
continue. After all,
10 or 20 pounds isn't
a big change, but 50 is. Eventually, I'll reach a certain size
that will make me realize that it's no longer a fantasy or a simple
game, and that it's really happening. I'll have really and truly
begun to get seriously overweight. I'll understand first hand
that there
are real, long-lasting or even permanent consequences to having
surrendered
control over my weight. I'll
realize how much work it would take to lose what I had already gained
and
that any further gain would make it all the more difficult. I'll
find that the dream is becoming a squishy, heavy
reality,
and
I will understand that if you kept feeding me, I will eventually end up supersized,
buried in
my own womanly flab.
At that point, I might get overwhelmed and say, "I want to
stop. It's too real. I'm big enough, I'm not curious
anymore.
I'm already too fat, I don't want to get bigger." But if your
goal is for me to be much larger, be firm and keep feeding me until I
am. I must end up huge if it's what you want, even if I
try to change my
mind. I might fight with you to get back control over decisions
about my growth or my diet. Don't let me have it back. All
of the weight gain decisions will be yours, not mine.
I
might beg, plead, or try to bargain with you to stop making me fatter..
I may ask you to postpone it a while or at least slow down so that I
can get used to my current weight for a couple of years. If
you're okay with me slowing down, that's fine-- it's your choice.
But if you want me
to continue gaining, that's
when you need to be firm and ignore my complaints and keep me eating
through those rough patches. Day by day, through steady gain,
making it increasingly harder for me to go
back and lose the weight if I tried. There will surely come a
point of no return when I'll see that I've gotten so fat that it would
be just take too much hard work, dieting, and exercise to lose even
half the weight
I'd gained, and I'll just give
up and surrender to my size... far easier to just keep eating and
getting fatter than to try and
get skinny again. If possible, you could grow me to that point
before I even fully realize it, before the reality of the situation
kicks in enough to cause me to have serious second thoughts. I'm
not sure what size that point of no return might be for me, but the
sooner you get me there, the sooner I'll accept that I can't stop
you, that I can't prevent my continuing fattening, and that
I will end up the size you
want
me to be.
I would consent beforehand to let
you disgregard any
objections
I might have later on in regards to my growth, since you'll understand
that
being turned into a fat-laden sow is my fate. How much I eat and
what
I weigh will no longer be under my control. You'll understand
that my protests and reluctance is just that part of me that is holding
on to the image of being thin and conventionally attractive, a part
that is struggling to
keep me from being a contented, well-fed, and well-fattened sow.
You'll understand that, for my
own good, you need to gag that skinny, inner bitch with food, smother
her with
fat until she's wiped out and all that is left is a fatslave who
finally
accepts that there can be no going back. You'll have the
final say concerning what and how I eat, how fast or slow I gain, and
anything else that might effect my fattening (such as some physical
activities that might burn off calories that you wanted me to
keep). Whether I gained as rapidly as possible or in slower
plateaus or stages would be up to you. This
doesn't
mean that you or I give up the option to leave the relationship for
whatever reasons, but that for as long as I choose to remain as your
feedee,
I implicitly consent to give up all rights over my diet, growth, and
ultimate
size.
Of course, you could always manipulate me into being less
psychologically able to leave the relationship (I go into that sort of
stuff on the humiliation page) or alter my eating habits to such a
degree that I would continue to gain even without you.
Conversely, as
long
as you stay as my feeder, you must put in the effort to keep me growing
until I reach your
goal.
You can use whatever methods are
necessary..
positive reinforcement and seduction (like physical pleasure as a
reward for over-eating or getting stuffed), coaxing and encouragement
("Open wide, baby, and eat for me. I can't wait to see your fat
belly resting on your lap. You know it'll feel so nice. Be
a good piggy for me, eat up and get fatter."),
punishment (I don't need a
lot of pain, a
little
goes a long way for me, and I'm far more inclined to obey honeyed,
sternly seductive demands than cold, barked orders), force-feeding,
funnel
feeding,
restraint and bondage, ultra-fatty concoctions (weight gain shakes,
heavy cream, loads of desserts),
intoxication, appetite stimulants, enforced laziness .. whatever it
takes to make me as fat as you want, as long as you know what you're
doing and it's
not dangerous. I'm susceptible to repeat and insistent persuasion
in the form of temptation. I want my will to resist to be worn
down until I was willing to do most anything. Of course, once I
lost any
will to resist or came to love my fat, real force would no longer be
necessary. I can easily see my chubby self pouting and insisting
that I didn't
want to get fatter, even as I obediently sat down in the feeding chair
as ordered,
offering no resistance as I was restrained in place, and opening my
mouth wide for the next meal that would surely make me chubbier.
Although I obviously prefer the all-or-nothing
route of ending up supersized once I started growing, I have thought of
gaining in small amounts. Trial or 'experimental' feeding, if you
will, of maybe 20 or 40 lbs just to see what it was really like.
Or agreeing to grow one panty size larger. That trial would have
pros and cons. It would give me a chance to see
what gaining and feeling fatter and growing out of clothes was really
like, though it wouldn't tell me what it would feel like to be
supersized and live that way. An extra couple dozen pounds is
nothing like an extra
couple hundred. And if I did choose to lose that weight
afterwards, I probably wouldn't be able to get back to where I started
by the sheer nature of gaining, like a woman who can't regain her old
figure after a pregnancy. So a small, experimental gain might
still have repercussions on my size, such as a plump belly and
lovehandles I could never be rid of. And consider
stretchmarks. If
I gained rapidly enough, I might have scars on my waistline that would
always be there even if I lost the weight. That can also be
exciting,
though, as much as it is worrying... how even a relatively small gain
wouldn't be 'safe' and could still permanently
change me even if I lost most of it. There's also the chance that
I might love it so much that I couldn't stop in spite of myself, and
find that a simple trial gain had trapped me on the path to obesity.
I'd like it if you kept telling me how I was going
to keep getting
bigger and I couldn't do anything about it, told me that I had no
concept
of how huge I'd become but that it would happen no matter what.
Make me know
that with every pound I gained, I would never weigh less than that
again in my life- I'd weigh more, but never less, and with every
clothing size I outgrew, I'd never be small enough to fit into them
again. You could have me give away all my smaller clothes, since
it would be
pointless to hang on to them. Then replace them with plus-size
clothes and tell me that I was going to fill them up
with
fat. Show me pictures of massive women
you wanted me to be like,
that you were going to turn me into one of them regardless of the
consequences. It's exciting to think that at some point most of
my body
will be made of fat. Tell me that you're going to totally and
permanently ruin my
figure and destroy my self control and that I'm helpless to prevent
it, that I'll, in fact, willingly submit to it.
I'd like it if you got off on hearing me complain about my
weight, as if my whining about the fat you were packing onto me was
music to your ears: "Look at me, I'm too fat, I look like such a
pig," I might say, and you might reply "Yes, you do look like a fat
pig,
but you're still nowhere near fat enough for me." Make me
accept
that food and fat is my future, that I should just try to relax and let
it happen, that the sooner I accept it the happier I'll be. Help
me become totally resigned to my fate.
Eventually, I'll be able to stop fighting it and
get
used to it. I'll have no choice but to embrace the prospect of
getting bigger
and
always remaining a very fat woman.
My final weight is entirely up to you. Again,
the only the only hard limit is to stop my gain before my mobility
becomes significantly compromised. Of
course, you're not obligated to
keep fattening me until I'm ridiculously
huge, but your
goal will become
my physical fate,
even if it's more than I think I'd want either now or later on.
You'll be growing my
body to conform to your preferences, not my own. If you had
originally told me your goal was to make me 350 pounds, but when I got
that
size you
decided I still wasn't big enough and wanted me to be closer to 450,
you would be free to keep
fattening me until I was the
right size for you- I'm not done gaining until you say I am. If
you think
a proper sow's belly should rest on the floor
when she's on all fours, then make mine grow until it does just
that. If you love it when a woman snacks constantly and never
seems to stop eating, train me so
that I habitually graze all day long. Or if your
ideal woman has a large stomach capacity and needs to eat a large
amount to get full, or habitually overeats, stretch me until I can
binge like you want me to. If you want me to have a certain waist
size, upper arm circumference,
or anything like that,
layer my body with fat until it reaches your preferred
dimensions. If you want my belly apron to hang near to my knees,
make
me gain until my belly is a swaying sack of fat.
If your favorite supersized model wears a 5X dress
size, fatten
me until that size fits me perfectly. If you
love the sight of stretchmarks, have me gain in such away that I
grow them all over for you. If you
feel
that I'm still more active than how you think an ideal fat woman should
be, train me to be lazy or
feed me until I'm so large I need
help to get out of a low chair, if that's what you want. If you
had previously told me that you weren't interested in making me gain
beyond
400, but then
realized once I reached that size that I still didn't properly fill out
a certain size
of clothing, or
my belly didn't rest on the floor like you wanted, or that my that my
face wasn't round enough or my double
chin wasn't fat enough, or you simply decided on a whim that 500 was a
nicer
number, then you could continue to feed me. It
doesn't
matter what my size limits are, what my expectations are, or what
weight I think would suit me
best, even if it went against prior agreements.. my feeder's opinion as
concerns my ultimate
size is the only one that matters. I want the amount of weight I
gain to be completely beyond my control. The bottom line is that
I will have to live with whatever body my feeder chooses to give me.
Of course, my feeder is free to take my preferences
into consideration and work with them, disregard them completely, or
even use
them against me. One thing I like to think about, for instance,
is what it would be like having my walk reduced to a slow, plodding
waddle. Knowing this, my feeder could get me to beg to be
waddle-sized, and hold me to it until it became reality, even if I
discovered that waddle-size isn't wasn't all that pleasant and I wanted
to
change my mind. Or, if
I
asked for a huge fat apron, not letting me stop gaining until I
developed
one, even if it meant the rest of me had to get far larger than I
would
have preferred. My
feeder might fulfill my wishes, even if it was by force by the
end. One must sometimes be careful what one wishes for.
I need a determined feeder who won't get frustrated
if I go through
periods of slow growth. I have no control over my metabolism or
how quickly my
body
assimilates fat, so don't punish me if I'm not gaining fast
enough.. it's not my fault. Also, don't punish me
if my weight fluctuates naturally, like if I lost a few pounds here and
there or something. In other words, don't get mad if the scale
reads
lower sometimes. The point is to add permanent fat to me and
ignore
the minor fluctuations in my inexorable conversion to obese
piggy.
You can punish me, though, if I attempt to diet, refuse to eat,
exercise with
the intent to lose weight, or intefere with
fattening in any way. Any of that would be me trying to regain
control of my size, which is taboo. Of
course, you needn't go for world record gain speeds, either. Too
much
too fast can be pretty dangerous. As little as a couple of pounds
a week would
have me well into the supersized zone within a couple years.
There's
no great rush. Remember: unless you have me on a yo-yo diet, I
can only gain all
this weight once, so I might as well be able to savor it all. But
fast or slow,
that's up to you. And
please don't order me to gain x number of
pounds
in a given week.. that'd be, in effect, giving me back control of my
weight. I want to have no control over my weight, even if the
purpose is
making myself
gain. If you want to try to put a certain number of pounds on me
in a
week, help me eat more or alter my diet or make my body more efficient
at storing fat. If I don't reach that goal, well, there's
always
next week. And I'd need someone who had a respect for what my
body can endure. Don't be reckless and abuse the power you'd have
over me. For instance, just because you could make me 500+ without making
me immediately immobile doesn't
necessarily mean you should,
not if my body just can't support it in the long run. It's
important not to let fantasy overcome pragmatism. I need a
feeder who can control their own urges and feed with some common
sense. Also, I
need someone who won't
get carried away and
will
understand physical
limits, especially in the beginning. You'll need to discern the
difference
between my saying I'm too full and can't eat another bite (but can),
and me saying I can't eat anymore and it being true. There's no
way I'll be able to eat as much as a lifelong overeater can, not right
away. Don't force
me too keep eating past my body's limits and end up with me getting
ill and puking.. that would be neither pleasant nor productive.
You need to make me enjoy and anticipate total fullness, not fear
it. Reward
me for being stuffed to groaning
insensibility. Be
patient
and slowly expand upon my physical limits until I'm able to eat (and
eventually need to eat) as
much as you think a
fatslave should.
I would also need a feeder who understands the
very real and serious consequences of their actions. Someone who
would understand that
by fattening their feedee, they were moving her into a high health risk
group. A feeder would need to be informed about the problems I
will face and
be responsibly prepared for them as a possibility. I'd need
someone strong
enough to cope with
problems if they arose and not just abandon me at the first sign of
trouble, right when I needed help the most. That said, I would
need
someone who was aware of the dangers yet still willing to fatten me in
spite of them. They would have to knowingly put me at risk in
order to achieve their goal, believing that making me obese outweighed
the dangers I would have to face. All decisions about my growth
and the resulting increase of the risk I would be facing would be made
for me. For my part, I would have to
accept that by
surrendering control over my weight I might someday very possibly
develop fat-related
problems
that I wouldn't be at risk of otherwise, and that my feeder would be
consenting on my behalf for
me to face those weight-related
risks. I might have some opinions on that matter, but the final
decision would always be in the hands of my feeder. I would have
to go along with the decision, whatever it might be.. I couldn't refuse
to gain on the grounds that it would be unhealthy for me. I would
accept that while my feeder had only the pleasure
of fattening me, I would be the one to face the consequences of their
feeding, whatever those might be. I would agree to not blame my
feeder if
something happened, absolving my feeder of any guilt. I would
know that even though becoming
supersized would likely be unhealthy, it would happen regardless and
for
my own good.
I wouldn't mind a feeder who isn't necessarily
looking for a sex-oriented
relationship
(of course, if that happens naturally, great), but mainly is obsessed
with fat.. the
look of it, the feel of it, the creating of more of it. Someone
for whom the
act of feeding itself at least as exciting as sex, if not far more (and
who wants me to
come to feel the same way). Someone who
delights over the formation of each new roll and stretch mark, loves
the sight of cheeks bulging with food, enjoys the moans of an
overstuffed feedee. Someone who is fascinated by the thought of
pushing food in someone's mouth, penetrating them in a sense, and that
by that simple act, changing the way the feedee's body is shaped
forever.
We might
agree on you using me sexually (I consent to your having control over
my body, but not automatically in that
way), or just keep it to a
strictly feeding
relationship. To you, I may be little more than an object to
encase in fat; not
interested in me as a partner but as a project. I'm
okay with that, as long as you're unrelenting and consistent. I
need someone
who doesn't just enjoy fat women; I need someone who loves the
idea
of the real-life transformation.. turning a skinny person into a fat
one, making a normal person eat and
gain
weight, patiently watching them get fatter until their body is buried
under
heavy, quivering rolls of blubber- turning them into a
different person in body, lifestyle, and mindset for the rest of their
life. Someone who
doesn't just enjoy feeding someone and playing with the fat they've
made, but takes pleasure the fatslave's growing limitations, the way
their lifestyle
changes as
their fat takes over, and the idea of making someone become sloppy and
piggish. The
transformation
should be as pleasurable for you as the end result. I don't want
you getting bored halfway through the process, which could take years..
I want you to relish every pound and milestone on the road of my
fattification, and I want you to make me enjoy it, too.
As part of giving up control over my weight, I would
naturally consent to have no control over what I ate. Even if my
feeder and I didn't have a total D/s relationship (total ownership) or
even a sexual relationship, my feeder would have total control and free
reign over one part of me--my mouth. My mouth
would effectively cease to belong to me. It would become my
feeder's property, since it's their
access to my stomach and ultimately the key to my weight gain. It
would be as though I had a funnel permanently implanted between my
lips, metaphorically speaking.
What
sort of food or drink went into it, the quality or quantity, would no
longer be my
decision. As though my mouth truly belonged to another person
(i.e. belonged to my feeder's fantasy fat woman) and
whatever it ate wasn't up to me,
although I'd have the privilege of tasting it. I
would have to eat whatever I was told, even though I knew it was going
to make me fatter, or even if I knew the purpose was to stretch my
stomach
and end up with me overeating even more in the future. I'd have
to just accept the bodily consequences of whatever my feeder did with
my mouth. I want to be trained to chew and swallow whatever food
was placed in my mouth with total obedience and compliance, as though
it was truly beyond my control, even if I didn't want to. If I
was angry, not hungry, or in a non-feeding mood, I would still have to
open wide and
eat and be unable to shut my mouth and refuse. If my
feeder wanted my mouth to eat like a good and eager feedee's would, no
matter when or where,
that's what it would do even if I didn't feel like an eager feedee at
the time. Whether it be
healthy food or junk food or any other kind, everything I
ate would
be up to my feeder. I would even have to eat things I didn't like
(though not without bitching). My feeder would decide what their
pet mouth, the mouth that used to be mine, liked or didn't like.
They could decorate it as they chose, with lipstick, or piercings, or
even collagen. If my feeder decided the mouth
belonged to a fat woman who loved fast food, then my diet would consist
almost totally of fast food. Even if they decided it belonged to
a woman who
was a heavy smoker or who drank a lot, then I'd find myself smoking or
drinking more. Absolute oral surrender.
Hopefully, this lack of control
would eventually be interalized, so that my appetite would take control
over my mouth like a feeder on my shoulder, overriding my willpower and
common sense (if I saw food that I knew my feeder would want me to eat,
I'd just eat it without hesitation). Perhaps my
tastes could
be changed to like things I didn't used to, increasing my gustatory
range so that I would enjoy most anything, like a proper glutton.
At the moment I don't have
a high tolerance of
super-fat things like cream and such, it makes me kinda queasy.
A feeder might be able to change that so that I'll be able to digest
very rich
and high-fat foods with ease, if you wanted to see me eat those
things. Even if I was put on a high carb or an ultra-fatty diet
designed to make me gain as fast as possible--or low protein to sap my
energy
to make me lazy--regardless of the
consequences, I'd have to submit to it even if I knew it was bad for
me in the long run. I would have to trust my feeder to be sane
and not completely
disregard my safety in the course of utilizing the mouth that used to
belong to me.
As a side note, I've thought a long term feeding
might roughly have
the following chain of events:
-- Stretching of the stomach to have a
larger capacity, increasing appetite, and adjusting to a fattier diet.
-- Learning to enjoy overeating for its own
sake, learning to love food, especially desserts. Adjusting to
laziness.
-- Starting to gain fat steadily.
Becoming plump. Developing an association of fattening = pleasure.
-- Learning to love the feel of fat on myself
and coming to look forward to getting more.
-- Learning to enjoy fat humiliation and
dependence on feeder.
-- Becoming obese. Accepting that I will
only ever continue to
grow and never lose. Learning to accept/anticipate possible
disabilities and hardships.
-- Acquiring habits the feeder likes and wants
to make a part of me (appearance, behavior, clothing) / adjustment to
new
lifestyle.
-- Becoming supersized. Possibly
developing fat related
disabilities/health
issues as fat takes over / learning to deal with them as a part of
normal life.
-- Possible loss of
self-pleasuring ability, replacing it with food.
-- Continuing to grow until reaching the goal
size, adjusting to life at that size.
-- Going on to live the rest of my life as a
hugely obese woman.
A very important thing to me is the permanence of
the transformation.
Even though the thought can be intimidating, I want the
fat you put on me to stay on me. I want to know that I'll stay
fat long after the initial excitement wears off and being obese has
become boringly normal for me. If I have the ability to diet
and lose weight, I might be tempted to diet just to make things easier,
after all is said and done, or
frequently worry about if I should. If I lost weight
to relieve some of the burden on me, then I would be disregarding the
sacrifices I willingly made for the priviledge of being fat. If I
can't diet, then I won't
have to worry about whether I ought to lose weight because it could
never happen anyway.
If it's possible, I don't want to even be able
to lose the weight even if left on my own, not without your express
permission or assistance. I'm not just
consenting to giving you control
of my weight in regards to growing me to a certain size, but control of
my eating habits and, as a result, influence over how I will most
likely look and
weigh for the
rest of my life. If you liked me best at 450 pounds, and wanted
me
to
stay that way, then 450 I would always remain (or thereabouts). I
don't want to
finally become supersize, decide I don't like it, and then set
about to losing it all. Part of the urge is not just the
transformation to obesity, but also the experience of always remaining
that
way and be just like any other fat woman who can't seem to lose the
weight. I don't want to prematurely cheat myself out of that
experience
by deciding to diet. I want to have to
grow
old
as the morbidly obese woman you turned me into. I look forward to
it, even.. getting ever more
comfortable with soft heavy body over the years until I'm a sagging,
shapeless, fat
old woman who long ago lost any motivation or ability to lose
weight.
I like the thought of
always
being at least the same dress size I was when I reached my goal weight,
and certainly unable to fit into any of the clothes I grew out of on my
way there. You have a
vision of how
big
I should be and how I should stay and I don't want to be able to
tamper with it: it's my duty and privilege as
a
fat slave to carry my fat through life. That said, if my feeder
got to me a certain goal, and decided to have me lose a little weight
to perhaps make things easier for me in the long run, or for any other
reason, that sort of thing would be okay since it wasn't up to
me. And if I decided
to lose some of the weight on my own, I want my habits there as
insurance that it wouldn't be easily done on a whim, if it could be
done at all.
Make dieting virtually impossible
for me. I'm not a big eater right now,
ironically,
I often go hungry. One of the differences between me and most
people who are naturally supersized is that people who are already that
size love food and love to eat (and it shows on their waistline).
I enjoy tasty food but I don't love it. I want to learn to love
it.
I want to acquire those eating habits and love of food that made other
people
supersized to begin with. I need you to expand my stomach to a
large
capacity
so that I need to eat a lot to feel satisfied or graze all day long
without
ever really feeling full. I love the idea of
being frequently forced to not just indulge in delicious, fattening
things, but
forced to overindulge in them until the overindulgence becomes habitual
and eating to
excess
is a goal in and of itself. Induced
gluttony. Make me so that I can't
stand hunger pangs. Make sure that
you have so
totally ruined my self-control and made such a glutton of me that that
I'll panic at the thought of not having food nearby. Make
eating my most pleasurable activity, better than sex, so that my
thoughts are always on
my next meal. Totally
destroy my willpower
and
self-control when it comes to trying to deny myself food. I want
to be
unable to leave any food on my plate, even pathetically licking the
plates clean and eating every crumb. You could compel me to
keep eating whatever
is in front of me until I can't take another bite, or make me graze
constantly until that behavior
is so engrained that I'll automatically do it without thinking;
if something is edible and within reach, it'll soon end up in my
stomach without me hardly noticing.
Also, I've never been a big eater of sweets, so I'd like you to make me
addicted to fattening cakes, candies, and desserts. Leave me
without any portion control so that every small craving
ends up as a binge-eating session.. like getting a craving for perhaps
a simple
slice of cheesecake and end up eating the whole cake. It'd be so
cool to eventually zone out while binging, not even being aware of how
much I was eating until I came to, totally bloated and surrounded by
empty plates and wrappers.
I like the idea of habitual overeating or food
addiction being engrained so deeply in me that it would be just as hard
(or harder) for me to overcome them as it would be for an (normal,
non-feedee)
overeater who
had those traits normally. I like it because if I acquired those
habits then I would naturally, helplessly gain even in the absence of a
feeder, just like anybody else who unintentionally became obese on
their own due to their uncontrollable appetite. It's very
difficult for many people who are already
obese to lose
weight and stop yo-yo-ing because they have to retrain their basic
nature and overcome their food-love to do so. I want to be the
same as them and have that
same difficulty and sense of helplessness. I can imagine a clever
feeder crystalizing those
habits and food addiction in me and stretching my stomach even before
setting about to make me seriously gain.. that way if I decided to
stop the feeding even while I was still
relatively small, I would still find myself stuck with the same
overeating habits
that made naturally huge people that size to begin with. Thus,
even if I left my feeder and took control over my size away from
their direct influence, it would still remain beyond my own
control.
As a
consequence of the habits I had been given, I would have no choice but
to keep gaining on my own. Although
it would happen much more slowly than with active feeding, my feeder
would have the satisfaction of knowing my new food addiction and
appetite would
inevitably cause me to feed myself to obesity whether I wanted it or
not.
You could make me habitually lazy so that I
won't be willing to exercise, or at least not enough to actually cause
weight loss (exercising only as necessary to maintain a level of health
or
mobility). I love the idea of being forbidden to exercise and
forced to get out of shape. Such as having all exercise-like
activities off limits, even having recreational walks limited to a
short distance, and restricted to only sedentary activities. I
wouldn't be allowed to lose any precious calories that could be used
for making more fat. Tell me it's good for me to be lazy.
Time would pass and I would grow increasingly physically unfit even
while I kept getting fatter. I would have to comply, even knowing
that I would eventually get so out of shape that simple activities
would become exhausting, my movements becoming more sluggish. I
would get used to being so lazy and free of the responsibility to stay
in shape. Most importantly, the longer I stayed like that, the
more insurmountably difficult getting back into shape enough to simply
exercise effectively would be. Reinforce the lazy lifestyle
you'll
give me so that I'll lose all motivation to attempt to live any other
way. Warn me that I had gotten so unfit that I might risk a heart
attack just trying to exercise, so that it would be healthiest for me
to stay as lazy as possible. Make me so that I'll spend
most of the rest of life off of my feet and sitting around while my
butt
spreads wider and wider across the sofa.
I need to be made to
believe
that losing my fat is the biggest offense I, a fatslave, could commit
in my
life.
Make me unwilling to even
consider
weight
loss
surgery as an option, and have me repeatedly vow never to get it no
matter what. Make me love my fat so much more than
anything else that I wouldn't dream of intentionally losing any of the
precious
lard. I love the idea of having so many redudant 'weight-loss
barriers' implanted in
me over time--being fat, laziness, over-eating, food addiction,
fattening habits, psychological conditioning, fat-lust--that ending up
fat and
remaining fat would be utterly unavoidable. How even if I
overcame one or two of the issues, the others would see to it that I
became massively overweight. I want to end up trapped within my
luscious fat as completely as possible. It's a lovely thought
that
after I had given up control over my size, it would end up staying out
of my hands forever. I
would never be able to reclaim it no matter how hard I tried, even
without a feeder present;
I
would be left without the willpower, desire, or self-discipline to
regain any
control. I could watch the digits on the scale move up or down,
but I would have no influence on that at all. The number on the
scale--as well as my dress size--would
only change due to the whims of my
appetite.
The reason why the permanence
is is
important is
because
it is unlikely that our relationship will last forever. It's
possible
that after I reach your goal and you're satisfied that I'll stay that
way,
you'll move on to fatten someone else. Maybe not, but
possibly. If we do part ways, I
want you to have made me so that you can rest assured that I won't be
able
to undo your handiwork, that I can never commit the sin of reclaiming
what I sacrificed so much for by losing weight. Or if I decided I
had enough and left prior to reaching your goal, if my habits had been
altered enough I'd still not be able to effectively lose weight.
I might even continue to helplessly gain on my own because of the
changes and
end up at (or beyond) your goal anyway.
I want to end up physically and
mentally unable to
turn myself into something other
than what you have turned me into. Even
years
later, if you make me unable to diet, you'll know
that
I'll still be carrying around the fat you gave me-- a waddling,
jiggling
testament of my submission to your feeding and to being a
fatslave.
Don't you
think
that's a wonderful image? If anything, I'll likely continue to
get
fatter throughout my life. No matter where you are or what you're
doing,
you'll know that I'll still be helplessly shoving food
into
my fat face and blissfully rubbing my belly. You'll know that
I'll
have been trained to subconsciously sabotage any attempts on my own to
lose weight, and will spend the rest of my life as the sedentary piggy
you turned me into. Even if I ended up not liking being fat as
much as I thought I would, I'd have to stay fat anyway. Just be
aware that once I
reach your goal, it
will be your
responsibility to alter my eating habits enough so that I stabilize at
that size,
otherwise I might not be able to ever make myself stop
gaining.
And what happens after the feeding? After I
become supersized and reach my feeder's
goal and either didn't have to--or wasn't able to--gain further, what
then? Hopefully, I would have been rendered unable to change
anything, so I
would never again give any serious thought to dieting or weight
control again. My transformation would no longer be a fantasy,
but a day-to-day reality. I'd be the real me, for all the world
to see, and I would have to come to terms with it. Having a huge,
hanging apron of fat would eventually
become no more out of the ordinary to me than having a flat tummy is
now. The person I was would be a distant memory. It would
be as if I had never been anything other than an
obese food addict. I suppose I would just settle down, go on with
my
daily concerns, eat whatever I wanted, and grow old as a content
fatty. While the actual feeding would end after I reached a
certain size goal, the whole experience of the path I had taken would
last for the rest of my life. Thusly, the experience of being a
feedee and fatslave wouldn't really be complete until I had gotten fat,
lived the rest of my life, and eventually died as a supersize person.
My feeder might lose interest in being with me
after I
reached my goal, but
might enjoy feeding me long distance. If I was already
hopelessly fat, I could have no objections to self-feeding
online if we remained on good terms. For years they could
reinforce the changes they had made
to me long-distance. Using a webcam, they could have me weigh and
measure
myself to show that I was staying at the proper proportions or that I
still wore the
clothes or lived the lifestyle they liked, or prove that I was still
single and devoted to food. I like that idea. If I
disobeyed, I would be completely alone, and isolation would quickly
drive me to repent and punish myself to get back in my feeder's
graces.
My feeder might decide at some point, even years
later,
that I needed to be fatter, perhaps as just slow
gain over time. I would still have no control over my weight and
to keep my feeder happy I would have to show the rising numbers on the
scale. I can imagine having to slowly continue to fatten up by my
own hand from my feeder's will, slowly but surely growing out of my old
clothes. The gain might not be fast- deceptively small amounts-
but over the years it would add up. Just a couple of pounds a
month for 5
years would result in over 100 pounds, and that's a lot if you're
already supersized. Hopefully, in such a situation, my feeder
would allow for
gains and losses.. gaining 20 then losing 15 or something, a perpetual
yo-yo diet, with small net gains
but resulting in me staying mostly the same, perhaps ending up a little
bit fatter than the year
before, so that I didn't really risk becoming immobile. That
might be okay.
When I give over control of my size, I want to
never reclaim that control ever again. Even though I couldn't
keep gaining nonstop for the rest of my life without compromising my
health and mobility, that wouldn't mean I had any
control over my weight. If I hovered around 450 pounds, say, it
wouldn't be because that's where I wanted to be; it would be
because that's where my feeder decided I should stay. It
might not be possible, but it's my dream that (as long as we remained
on good terms) my feeder would retain their control for the rest of my
life. It's such a comforting thought that the numbers on the
scale
would be forever beyond my control and that my mouth would never again
belong entirely to me.