Escape
I’ve given up on giving up slowly
I’m blending in so you won’t even know me
Apart from this whole world that shares my fate
This one last bullet you mention
It’s my one last shot at redemption
Cause I know to live you must give your life away
His feet made deep imprints on the grass as he made his way across the darkened lawn. His shoes squished beneath him, making light squelching noises that hurt his ears in the dead silence. The streetlamp nearest to him was dim, and the one up ahead was out, so he was simply a shadow crossing the yard; his figure was unseen unless someone looked more closely. He felt sure no one would.
The house was dark when he finally approached it, feeling his way in the dark; he had sustained several minor injuries from unpleasant shrubbery but it was nothing he couldn’t handle. The pain in his heart cancelled out all over forms of pain; he noticed, vaguely, that one of his cuts was bleeding and stung as a fresh bout of rain drenched him.
In record time, he bounded up the steps of the house, looking graceful like a cat. He was unsteady on his feet, however, and slipped on the welcome mat; he grasped for the door handle and his knuckles connected with the wood. He yelled out in pain and pulled his hand back, examining it the best he could in the dark. He could tell he’d gotten a splinter. The thought made him both cringe, and smile, because it reminded him of before. He let out a rather loud yelp, accompanied by several choice obscenities.
A light turned on in the hallway, but he was too busy cursing his hand (and the wooden door) to notice. When the offending door swung open, however, he tumbled down out of sight, landing spread-eagle in a hydrangea bush.
“Dom?” An unsure voice called out just as a porch light went on, illuminating the surrounding area, and giving away his position.
He jumped to his feet; he was now covered in mud, leaves and bits of twig. Not to mention a healthy amount of rain water. His hair was slicked back and stuck to his head, and though he still felt a throbbing pain somewhere on his leg, he strode to the bottom of the porch looking like he’d meant to land in the bush the whole time.
“Lovely night for a stroll,” Dom commented airily, waving an arm around like a talk show host introducing a guest.
The younger, and shorter, man climbed down to the bottom of the steps, a wry smile on his lips. His hair was disheveled (giving him the look of a little boy, a thought that made Dom want to embrace him and never let go) and he wore tattered slippers on his feet as well as a pair of warn pajama bottoms (adorned with SpongeBob SquarePants) and a t-shirt declaring his love of NYC.
“You’re out strolling, are you?” Elijah questioned, his head cocked to the side curiously. “In the middle of the night?”
“Yes,” Dom answered stoutly. “I prefer to stroll when it‘s dark. The night air really strengthens my lungs.”
Elijah chuckled, an eyebrow raised. “Huh.”
“Never mind that I strolled about eighty kilometers out of my way.” He dug his feet into the wet ground, unearthing a worm, and then stepping away from it quickly to make sure he didn’t kill it. “So, how are you, Lijah?” His voice held a bit of an undertone of longing, possibly mixed with incredible sadness, but he tried desperately to make it sound like he was just asking about the weather.
“I’m okay,” Elijah replied slowly, watching as the rain came down, beating against his lovely grass. “Wanna come inside?”
And I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity
And I’ve been locked inside that house
All the while you hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out
And that might be the death of me
And even though there’s no way of knowing
Where to go I promise I’m going because
I gotta get out of here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I gotta get out of here
And I’m begging you, I’m begging you, I’m begging you to be my escape
It was considerably warmer inside the house when Dom arrived inside, dripping onto Elijah’s clean hardwood floors. He was shivering as water droplets went from the tips of his hair, down his neck and inside his shirt. For a moment, he wished he hadn’t made the trek. His house seemed terribly inviting at the moment; despite the fact that a half hour ago found him pacing in an attempt to get his mind off Elijah.
Then, he had felt like a gerbil trapped inside a tiny cage. Now, he thought that perhaps he had gotten a bit drastic with that simile. He was certainly not a gerbil. He was just a guy who happened to be longing for something that seemed too far out of reach.
In this case, the ‘something’ was Elijah. And he happened to be standing in front of Dom gazing at him with those huge, clear blue eyes.
Dom’s head felt fuzzy, and he shook it in an attempt to clear his thoughts. Excess water rained down upon Elijah, and he laughed.
“You’re like a dog,” Elijah commented lightly, heading out of the room.
Dom could hear him opening up the linen closet, and it was a moment before Elijah shouted, “Come here, boy!”
Apparently, Dom was not only drenched, but was also being referred to as a dog. Surely the night couldn’t get any better.
As it turned out, the night certainly did turn around.
Elijah was holding the towel out at arms’ length when Dom rounded the corner; once within reach, Elijah wrapped Dom up in the fluffy blue fabric (the color of which matched his eyes) and pulled him into a tight hug.
“I’m glad you came,” he said into the older man’s ear, making goosebumps run up and down Dom’s arms. “I missed you.”
Dom turned around in Elijah’s arms, a huge smile gracing his shivering lips. This declaration was just what Dom wanted to hear, and it made his heartbeat pick up, and his stomach churn with nervousness. “You just saw me two hours ago.”
“That’s all it takes,” Elijah responded simply, letting his arms drop to his sides. He smiled cheekily. “I think we should get you out of those wet clothes.”
“You just want me to be naked so it’s easier for you to have your way with me, Mr. Wood,” Dom replied steadily, despite the shivering and the rapid thoughts of just what might happen once he was out of the wet clothes, and the goose bumps, which hadn’t gone away.
As Elijah came closer still, in the darkened, very small hallway, Dom was quite sure the goosebumps weren’t going to go away anytime soon.
I’ve given up on doing this alone now
Guess I failed and I’m ready to be sure now
You told me the way and now I’m trying to get there
And this life sentence that I’m serving
I admit that I’m every bit deserving
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair
The kiss was like something out of an old Hollywood movie. Deep, deliberate, intense. Possibly black and white, as it seemed to Dom that all color drained out of the room. In fact, for Dom, the room ceased to exist altogether. It was just he and Elijah, wrapped up in each other in the middle of an empty house as lightning struck outside and thunder rolled overhead.
It was rather romantic, if he did say so himself. Which he did.
“This is rather romantic,” Dom said, chuckling slightly at Elijah’s entranced state. His eyes took a moment to focus, and it occurred to Dom that Elijah didn’t have his contacts in so he couldn’t really see all that well.
Elijah’s eyes adjusted after a moment, while Dom watched on in bemusement. “Shit,” Elijah muttered suddenly, heading for the stairs.
“Lighe?” Dom questioned, following him.
“Freaking romantic as all hell,” Elijah replied, cursing as he stomped up the stairs. “My roof is leaking. I forgot.”
Dom jumped up the stairs two at a time and saw Elijah dumping a bucket filled to the brim with water into his bathtub. “Why don’t you ring a roofer?” Dom asked, leaning his hip against the doorjamb and pulling the towel closely around his shoulders. His goosebumps had not yet left him, and it was drafty and cold upstairs, making it impossible to stop shivering.
Elijah looked up from the tub, a crooked smile on his lips. “Dom, it’s after 1am. What roofer in his right mind is up at this hour?”
“You could at least ring one and leave a phone message.”
A glasses-clad Elijah turned around fully and sat cross-legged in the middle of the bathroom. Dom held back a laugh; Elijah looked like a little kid, but a completely adorable one. “Did you come here just to badger me about my roof?” His voice held a casual note, but was underlined with a large desire to know what was really going on.
“No,” Dom stated earnestly. He pushed himself off the doorjamb and went into the bathroom, plopping down in front of Elijah. His wet clothes made squishy noises as he sat down. “I came because I have something important to tell you.”
Elijah, for his part, was completely baffled. He had never seen Dom so serious, and it scared him. While he was secure in their relationship, there was a nagging little thing in the back of his mind that said anytime Dom gets serious it means he’s going to utter the words you least want to hear: ‘We have to talk.’
Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity
And I’ve been locked inside that house
All the while you hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out
And that might be the death of me
And even though there’s no way of knowing
Where to go I promise I’m going because
I gotta get out of here
Cause I’m afraid that this complacency is something I can’t shake
I gotta get out of here
And I’m begging you, I’m begging you, I’m begging you to be my escape
The thunder and lightning were getting progressively worse as Dom and Elijah made their way downstairs to the living room. Even though every light was on in the house, it was still dark and dreary thanks to the sky outside.
Elijah dropped heavily onto his large sofa and waited, his face impassive. Dom stood in the middle of the floor, hands in his pockets, eyes on anything but Elijah. A picture on the wall above the couch held his attention for a while, with its flowing purples and pinks and blues. Seeing it reminded him of Elijah, actually. Although, most things these days reminded Dom of Elijah.
“You said you had something important to say,” Elijah prompted helpfully.
“I do,” Dom replied, suddenly remembering the reason he was here in the first place. He cleared his throat and tugged at his wet collar. “It’s pissing rain out there,” he commented, gesturing to the large picture window.
Elijah cocked an eyebrow, looking amused. “That’s what you came here to say?”
Dom blinked. “Well, no,” he allowed, his voice even. “That was just an observation.”
“You mean it was a stalling for time tactic.”
Dom’s lips quirked upwards. “That too.”
“Dom,” Elijah stated quietly, his voice filled with sincerity. “What’s going on with you?”
I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self-detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for you to do what you can with me
But I can’t ask you to give what you already gave
He sat slowly in the armchair that was his favorite piece of furniture in Elijah’s house. He remembered many movie nights spent in this very chair, and he smiled at the memories. This was the right thing to do, he decided. It was time.
“I’m in love with you,” Dom said slowly, enunciating every word so nothing could be misconstrued.
Elijah sat immobile in what seemed to be a very awkward position. He had been, before Dom’s announcement, attempting to change positions and was about to tuck a leg underneath himself. He was now hovering slightly above the couch, one leg bent clumsily, and the other on the floor, the only thing keeping him from toppling over.
“W-what?” Elijah stuttered, letting himself fall back on the couch.
Dom’s lips curved into a hesitant smile. “I’m in love with you, Lighe. When I’m not with you…” he trailed off with a shrug. “I’m nothing,” he continued. “I just want to be with you.” He smiled fully this time, standing up and crossing to sit beside Elijah. “I just want you. Forever, if that’s possible.”
The younger man let out a short laugh, accompanied by a slight smile and a nervous twitching of his left eye. He seemed to be in shock.
“You don’t have to say anything,” Dom stated evenly, suddenly feeling worried that Elijah couldn’t reciprocate his feelings, even though they’d been ‘hanging out’ for more than a year…as more than just friends. “I understand if you don’t feel the same.” He moved to stand up, but Elijah caught his elbow and held it steadily.
“I’ve been in love with you since day one.” His voice was hoarse, and thick with emotion.
The smile that spread across Dom’s lips was one of the brightest Elijah had ever seen. And it was followed by a very intense kiss that caused them both to have weak knees and drop down onto the couch, tangled together.
Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity
And I’ve been locked inside that house
All the while you hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out
That might be the death of me
And even though there’s no way of knowing
Where to go I promise I’m going because
I gotta get out of here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I gotta get out of here
And I’m begging you, I’m begging you, I’m begging you to be my escape