Dedication: This story is for Jenny, who tried for, like, a year to get me to like Westlife and has finally succeeded. She does tons of stuff for me and I love her for it. You rock, Jenny!

Note: I was originally going to use “Love Crime” for this story’s song, but as I wrote it, I changed it because this one seemed to fit more.

Dreaming In Denial

“Yes, well, there were times when we wanted to rip each other’s throats out, but----” Dom chuckled, “---we really, honestly, love each other as brothers.” Smiling, he waited for the next question to be asked.

The girl at his arm was looking around apprehensively at all of the photographers. Lights flashed in her eyes, making tiny spots blur her vision. She clutched at his arm, sighing heavily as her heart began to speed up. “Lilly,” Dom whispered out of the corner of his mouth, “You’re crushing bones, love.”

She let up slightly on his forearm and nervously tucked a piece of short, dark brown hair behind her ear. Her brown eyes were wide with apprehension at the screaming crowd in front of them, behind the reporters. As her palms began to sweat she saw a figure step out of the crowd and smile at her. She felt her nerves immediately begin to calm down.

Dom posed a bit for a picture and then the reporter asked the question he knew would be coming, “Who’s the lovely lady, Dom?”

He visibly stiffened and she looked at him, partially dreading the answer and also longing to hear what he would say. The man that had smiled at her was about a foot away, answering questions of his own, with no one at his side.

“This is my friend, Lilly,” Dom replied, nodding and stepping to the next reporter and camera man pair. The crowd squealed with glee as they caught sight of him moving their way. The entrance to the cinema was wide open, admitting crowds of people.

She breathed a sigh of relief as the dread floated away. ‘Friend.’ That was good; that was all she wanted to be to him.

Baby you’re so beautiful

And when I’m near you

I can’t breathe

A girl like you gets what she wants

When she wants it

You’re so out of my league

Billy tugged at the collar of his tux, silently wishing it to loosen; it felt like a very tight noose and he wanted it to let go of its hold on him. He was sweating, maybe because of the lights on him, maybe because of his attire; maybe of something completely different.

He saw her moving from foot to foot as if she couldn’t wait to bolt out of the lime light; he liked that about her, she shied away from media attention. Ever since he had known her, she’d go forty blocks out of her way in order to avoid photographers.

She looked incredible in a subdued shimmering purple dress; it brought out the light highlights in her hair, and the specks of green in her eyes. As Billy watched her, he felt his throat close up. He always had this trouble when he was near her, it was as if she were some sort of poison to him. Like kryptonite.

Lilly glanced at him and smiled, then turned back to Dom, who was speaking to her. Dom and Lilly had been friends since Dom had moved in next door to her in Manchester, England when he was twelve. Billy couldn’t tell what their relationship was, though; he’d never had the courage to ask either of them. Though he’d spent lots of time with both, the words never came out. Billy was a brave person in everything concerning everything, except for when it involved Lilly. He was putty when it came to her.

I show you no emotion

Don’t let you see

What you’re doing to me

I imagine the two of us together

But I’ve been living in reality

“Billy, it’s so nice to meet you,” Lilly said, biting her bottom lip nervously, “I’ve heard so much about you.”

“I’m sure those things aren’t at all true,” Billy replied, grinning cheekily as he shook her hand. “Dom has a tendency to lie.”

“I don’t lie,” Dom put in, “I exaggerate. There’s a difference.”

Billy shrugged, and then turned back to Lilly, her full lips were curled into a huge grin, “It’s nice to meet you, too.”

“I was hoping the things were true,” Lilly said, looking serious suddenly, “They were very amusing.”

Billy raised an eyebrow, “Really, now. What did Dommy boy say to you?”

Dom took a seat, feeling as if this conversation was going to last for a while. “I think I mentioned our showers together,” Dom remarked offhandedly as he flipped through a magazine.

“That was supposed to stay private.”

Lilly laughed, “He only told several reporters…and maybe some random people on the street.”

Billy’s eyes grew wide, but then he began laughing when he realized she was kidding. As she laughed and fell onto the couch beside Dom, Billy noticed how lovely her laugh was and how her eyes sparkled when she was being foolish.

Fear of rejection

Kept my love inside

But time is running out

So damn my foolish pride

Billy snapped back to earth. “BILLY? BILLY!”

“What? Huh? Sorry.” Billy shook his head, the corner of his eye catching a glimpse of purple dress and dark hair.

“It’s alright,” the man was saying, brandishing a microphone in Billy’s face, “Tell us, why are you by yourself tonight?”

Inwardly Billy groaned heavily, but outwardly he remained composed and normal, “Couldn’t get a date,” he joked in his thick Scottish accent. The man laughed falsely.

“Are you single, Billy?” A woman asked, elbowing her way into the tiny group. Billy shuffled back in forth on the red carpet, looking like he was really ready to get inside and just watch the movie.

“I am, yes,” Billy responded, nodding slightly. The woman grinned at him, batting her eyelashes. Billy wasn’t normally one to ignore such blatant flirting, so he winked and moved on.

I don’t care if you think I’m crazy

It doesn’t matter if it turns out bad

I’ve got no fear of losing you

You can’t lose what you never had

“How long have you known Dom?” Billy asked, dipping some chopsticks into a container and stuffing some food into his mouth.

Lilly thought for a moment and then shrugged, “As long as I’ve known myself.”

“So, about a year?” Billy teased, “That was a really bad joke.”

Lilly laughed, nodding vigorously, “I’ll say.”

The two of them were comfortably sitting in Billy’s living room devouring enough food for several armies while watching some classical movies.

For Billy, there was always sexual tension between the two of them. With her sitting so close, he wondered how he was able to breathe.

“He pushed me into a mud puddle on our way to school. He had just moved in next door. I was twelve, I hated him for getting me all muddy on the first day of school.” She laughed fondly.

“His charm won you over in the end,” Billy stated, smiling, “He did the same thing to me when I met him. We should tell him to think up some new opening lines.”

Lilly laughed and leaned her head on his shoulder, “Girls don’t like getting muddy.”

“I don’t mind it,” Billy replied, shrugging slightly.

She picked her head up and looked at him, “That’s because you’re unique.”

Now I’m going to confess that I love you

I’ve been keeping it inside

Feeling I could die

If you turn away

Then that’s okay

At least we’ll have a moment

Before you say goodbye

You can’t lose what you never had

“Hey Lil,” Billy said warmly, giving her a quick hug. She embraced him strongly, happy to have someone she knew talk to her. She’d been talking to Dom in between his interviews, but she felt extremely out of place. In fact, she’d never been so glad to see Billy in her entire life.

“Billy, I am so glad to see you,” she replied, pulling away.

His eyes brightened, “Dom’s hotness not enough for you?”

Lilly leaned towards him secretively, “I’ll tell you a secret.” Billy made a motion telling her he was all ears. “Dom’s not really hot. It’s just a façade. He likes to THINK he’s hot, but it’s not true.”

Dom’s eyes widened and his mouth dropped open, “I’m offended!”

Laughing, Lilly put a hand to her mouth, “Sorry, Dom, didn’t think you were listening.” She shrugged, “I only speak the truth, you know.”

“I don’t think he’s that hot,” Billy commented, smiling at her. While Dom laughed and went back to his questions, Billy and Lilly shared a mysterious smile and knowing glance.

Rules are made for breaking

Nothing ventured

Nothing gained

I’ll be no worse off

Than I am right now

I might never get that chance again

Billy shook his head, his long soaked hair spraying water droplets all over the place. Lilly covered her face until he was finished. She was dripping wet as well, and now more so.


“I didn’t realize you had turned into a dog between here and the car,” Lilly commented, wringing her hair out a little. It was dripping down her shirt, the cold was making her shiver.

“Sorry,” Billy apologized, closing the door and shrugging out of his jacket. “Let me get you a towel.” Taking a quick trip around his apartment in search of towels, he found two clean ones in the bathroom and gave Lilly one.

She was shivering uncontrollably as she ran the warm towel through her hair. Billy put his own towel down and began rubbing her arms slowly, in an attempt to warm her up. Lilly looked up at him, watching his face; he stared back at her.

“Lil,” he whispered, swallowing and then taking a step towards her.

Lilly parted her lips slightly in anticipation of what she thought was to come.

“GOD!” Dom hollered, as he, Elijah and Orlando fell through Billy’s front door. Billy pulled away from Lilly and she dejectedly began drying off her hair again. “It’s pouring out there!”

“We hadn’t noticed,” Billy remarked dryly.

Elijah raised an eyebrow at his sour looking friend, “Are we interrupting something?”

Dom, Elijah and Orlando all exchanged glances and turned back to the semi-blushing couple. Lilly looked at Billy to answer their question.

“Nope,” he answered, putting on a falsely cheery voice, “We were just drying off.”

Fear of rejection

Kept my love inside

Told my heart

I didn’t want you

But I lied

“Dude!” Elijah exclaimed, shaking his head, “You need to TELL her.”

“Tell her?” Billy repeated, “How in the world can I do THAT?”

“Usually opening your lips and letting words come out, works,” Orlando commented.

Billy snorted, “Yes, I know how to SPEAK, thanks.” He rolled his eyes and then sighed miserably. “I can’t.”

“Why can’t you?” Sean wanted to know. The four of them were sitting in Billy’s trailer. After knowing Lilly for five months and spending hours upon hours with her, Billy had developed a bit of a crush, or more than a crush, and had called a hobbit meeting; Orlando was in Dom’s place, however, because this was not the type of thing you said to Dom since he was extremely protective of his oldest friend.

“She’s Dom’s best friend,” Billy replied, playing with the straw in his drink and plunking the ice cubes to the bottom of the glass.

Elijah sat back in his seat, “If you’re in love with her, you need to tell her. Preferably before she leaves and you never see her again.”

“I’m not ‘in love’ with her,” Billy retorted, putting finger quotes around ‘in love’ for emphasis.

“Then what would you ‘call it’?” Orlando wondered, putting finger quotes on ‘call it’ even though he didn’t need to.

Elijah laughed, “You don’t need finger quotes around call it, Orly.”

“I will use finger quotes when and where I want to, Elijah Wood.”

“You are in love with her,” Sean stated, ignoring the other two’s bickering.

Billy put his head in his hands and rested it on the table, “All right, so maybe I am.”

I don’t care if you think I’m crazy

It doesn’t matter if it turns out bad

I’ve got no fear of losing you

You can’t lose what you never had

Shuffling back and forth on his feet, Billy watched as Lilly became animated when the interviewer asked her what she thought about the Lord of the Rings trilogy. He loved that she was so passionate about the movies; having been a huge fan of the books since she was practically in diapers, she had lots to say on the subject.

“Will this be your first viewing of Return of the King?” The woman asked, fluffing her hair and glancing at Dom, who was watching Lilly.

“Yes,” Lilly answered, “I can’t wait.”

“You’ve seen the other two?”

“Oh, God, yes,” Lilly replied, smiling and laughing a bit, “I was first in line to see both. This will be really cool, though, because I’m actually here at the premiere.”

“And how long have you known Dom?”

“Since we were twelve.”

Billy smiled kindly in her direction; he loved her voice. She sounded very proper this evening, though usually she swore like a sailor and used American and British slang together to sound like a ghetto Londoner. He loved how quirky she was, and how she marched to her own drummer, and how she got nervous around press even though regularly she was what you’d call a “spit fire.”

Lilly seemed to feel his eyes on her, for she turned away from the interview to let Dom do the talking, and caught Billy’s eye. He shyly turned away after smiling happily to himself at her attention.

Now I’m going to confess that I love you

I’ve been keeping it inside

Feeling I could die

If you turn away

Then that’s okay

At least we’ll have a moment

Before you say goodbye

“I really like Lilly,” Billy said, chewing on his sandwich thoughtfully.

“Mmmm, I know,” Dom replied, sticking a few chips into his mouth and swigging down some Pepsi.

“She’s really lovely.”

“Yes, she is.”

“She’s fun, too.”

“She likes you, too, you know,” Dom said, watching Billy’s reaction out of the corner of his eyes. Billy remained impassive to this news. He knew she liked him, he just doubted she saw him as more than a friend. Billy, deep down, had a feeling that Lilly was secretly in love with Dom.

“I think she might be in love with you,” Billy blurted out before thinking about what he was saying.

“What?” Dom laughed, spraying some crumbs all over the table and onto Billy, who sat across from him at the pub’s small booth. “Hardly.”

“What do you mean?”

“She’s not in love with me, you twit.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Why do you think that she is?”

“You know I hate when you answer my question with a question.”

Here on the outside looking in

Don’t wanna stay dreaming

About what could have been

Need to hear you speak my name

Even if you shoot me down in flames

Lilly was all smiles at the after party. She was walking around by herself, talking to random people. She saw many of the other actors of the Lord of the Rings movies and congratulated them on how well they did. Lilly wasn’t usually such a mingler, but she was in a good mood and felt the need to show it.

“So, you liked it?” Dom asked, stepping up behind her as she ordered a drink at the bar.

“I LOVED it!” Lilly raved, smiling widely. She gave him a quick hug. “You were wonderful.”

“Why thank you,” Dom bowed modestly. “Have you spoken to Billy?”

“No, not yet,” she answered, looking around the crowded room for him. “Do you know where he is?”

“In the corner, somewhere. He was talking to Elijah about something. I couldn’t approach them because they gave me the evil eye. Apparently, I was not wanted.” Dom faked looking hurt, “I think it’s some secret mission. They’re probably going to pull my trousers down once I’ve gotten sloshed enough.”

Lilly giggled a little, “Yes, that sounds like something they would do.”

“You should go find out for me, to warn me.”

“What makes you think I’d take YOUR side and tell you what they’re planning?”

“Because you’ve known me longer,” he replied, grinning cheekily.

“Longevity is not the deciding vote, Dominic.”

“Oh, fine, take Billy’s side, since you fancy him.” Dom said fancy in a teasing way and she hit him playfully on the arm. “You do fancy him.”

“I don’t,” she responded, sipping at her drink, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I should find Viggo and tell him how very, VERY attractive he was in the last scene.”

“What about me? How attractive was I?” Lilly laughed, but didn’t answer him. Dom watched her walk off, but she went in the opposite direction of where Viggo was stationed, and headed towards Billy’s table in the back.

I don’t care if you think I’m crazy

It doesn’t matter if it turns out bad

I’ve got no fear of losing you

You can’t lose what you never had

“So, you have to tell her,” Elijah was saying, leaning in close to Billy so that no one would overhear.

“Tonight?” Billy answered his own question, “No, not tonight.”

“Oh, come one. You have to. It’s all over tomorrow. We won’t be seeing each other on a regular basis. There won’t be any extra scenes we have to shoot. You might see Dom, but it’s not a guarantee you’ll see her, too.” Elijah’s voice got deeper, “Bite the bullet!”

Billy shrugged, “Eh.”

Elijah grinned like the Cheshire Cat, “If she comes up to you, will you?”

Billy laughed, figuring that’d never happen. “Yeah, why not.”

“Brilliant,” Elijah replied, raising his eyebrows suggestively, “Here she comes.” He stood up and walked off in the other direction. Billy became wonderfully aware of the alcohol flowing through his veins. He willed the two glasses to become twenty-two so he’d have more courage.

“Hey, Billy,” Lilly said, approaching the table, “Where’d your entourage go?”

Billy waved his hand to the left, “Over there, somewhere.”


Lilly sat beside him, “So, the film was fantastic. You were bloody incredible.”

“Thanks,” Billy replied sincerely, smiling at her. He shifted in his seat so he could look at her face on. “I’m glad you liked it.”

“I don’t know how I couldn’t.” She waved at Dom, who was standing by the bar with a girl she didn’t know; he waved back and smiled.

“Oh, right, Dom’s hotness.” Billy rolled his eyes, “It’s always Dom’s hotness. Never Billy’s.”

“It’s sometimes Elijah’s. Or Orlando’s.”

“Thank you,” Billy deadpanned, “That helps.”

“You’re hot to,” she cooed, smiling.

Billy suddenly felt very weak, and would have had to sit down, had he not been already. His palms became sweaty and his heartbeat picked up considerably. “Lilly, I need to tell you something before I pass out.”

She looked alarmed, “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” he assured her, “I just need to get this out.”

I’m going to confess that I love you

I’ve been keeping it inside

Feeling I could die

If you turn away

Then that’s okay

At least we’ll have a moment

Before you say goodbye

You can’t lose what you never had

“Billy,” she said, sounding serious and looking worried, “What’s going on? Are you sick?”

“No, no,” Billy replied, “I’m just…I’m not myself lately.” He swallowed, thankful for her not saying anything just yet. “I’m kind of---well, kind of----”

His head screamed, ‘Just tell her already, you twat!’ but he wouldn’t listen to himself.

“I’m kind of drunk,” he finished lamely.

“You don’t look drunk,” Lilly said skeptically.


“Well, I’m not, per say…” Billy’s voice trailed off. “I’m a bit in love, is all.”

“Being drunk and being in love are two different things,” Lilly laughed, “And who is the lucky girl?”

Billy stared at her, trying to tell her with his eyes because his voice wouldn’t work properly. Instead of trying to find the words, he leaned over and kissed her passionately on the lips. When she began responding, his heart nearly burst out of his chest.

After several hot moments, he pulled away, “I’m in love with you. I have been…for a while.”

Lilly smiled slowly, “I know.” She rested her head on the back of the couch; he watched her apprehensively. “I love you,” she said suddenly, not looking at him, “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything before now. I was afraid you didn’t feel the same.”

Billy could hardly believe his ears, “I was afraid too. I kept trying to tell myself that I didn’t love you, that I was just infatuated by you. But I was being stupid. Obviously.”

She laughed, “Yes. Obviously.”

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