The Anti-Spotlight
Well, you could probably see this one coming too: with a Song Spotlight on a potential chart breaker, I offer a page devoted to describing the worst song- or songs- on the radio. This is where I get my club and bash these records good, hoping the radios will follow suit and NEVER PLAY THESE SUCKERS AGAIN!!!
Blackstreet- Wizzy Wizzy Wow
I think I wizzied myself to sleep with this sucker. The lyrics are downright horrible, as is the chorus of "Wizzy, wizzy/Wizzy, wizzy/Wizzy wizzy wow/Wizzy wow". Wow *yawns*. This song makes me so "wizzy" I don't want to hear it anymore, thank you very much.
Rocco- Drop The Bass
Ever wondered what an incoherent, messy dance song sounded like? Well, Rocco provides you with a crash course on it, with a track so messed up, it's laughable. Basically, Rocco believes putting in syth loops and continous thumps constitutes a strung-together track and it fails horribly. This track is more confusing than entrancing, and, from a dance artist, this isn't acceptable.
Shaggy- Strength Of A Woman
This song is supposed to be about how good the love of a woman is but you can't tell because the lyrics hardly ever explain themselves, so all you get is confusion. Not only that, Shaggy tries his hand at singing and proves he can't do that either. He's complaining about a lack of MTV airplay: well, why not give us something good and maybe we'll consider you, okay?
O-Town- These Are The Days
Really, really dry pop garbage from a manufactured boy band that just won't go away. "All Or Nothing" may have been in the same mold, but at least that song was peaceful and touching, which doesn't describe this horribly simply, dull, dry song from the boys. If Lou Pearlman just stopped thinking for a second about all those dollar signs....
LL Cool J- Clockin' G's
LL Cool J showed hip-hoppers how to correctly sing a love song with "Luv U Better" and now shows hip-hoppers how to sing them wrong. This song keeps with the LL tradition of offering smart tracks ("Father", "Luv U Better") mixed with more terrible ones ("Hot Hot Hot", "Doin' It"), as, like the stinkers, this song's all about sex and what positions he likes in bed, using the same cliches other hip-hop artists he's supposed to better use. LL's always been wildly inconsisent and, with this stinker, obviously proves it.
Madonna- Die Another Day
Hey everyone! It's Sarina Paris...check that, it's Madonna!(?) In another transformation, Madonna decides to go to the light, fluffy dance route to sing the title for the new James Bond movie "Die Another Day" (as in what Bond's movies plan to do) and sounds more like Paris than anything else. Not only that, the lyrics are absolutely abysmal, as Madonna exclaims "Sigmund Freud" after the first verse for absolutelty no reason at all. I liked "Frozen" Madonna: can we have her back and not this crappy version?
Foggy- Come Into My World
THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP...you know, with all this thumping, I may "thump" this song out of the room thank you very much.
-DG
The WORST Songs on the radio
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