| I have recently had the displeasure going to a site that had a vote going on. The vote was: Who would win in a fight? Raptors or Aliens? It's not the vote that irritated me. Nor what they were voting about. It was worse. Much worse... So I read this and am like, hey no problem aliens would whoop there scaly asses. Then suddenly like the freezing hand of Lucifer himself it hit me. 60% said RAPTORS WOULD WIN! DEAR SWEET MOTHER OF ALL THAT IS GOOD WHAT IS THIS! HOW COULD SOMEONE SAY A SCALY DUMB AS A ROCK OVERGROWN GECKO WITH NO REAL SPECIAL NATURAL DEFENSE SYSTEM BEAT AN ALIEN! *Starts foaming at the mouth* Ok, ok Genocide, go to your happy place. Alien hive full of the corpses of my fallen enemies. Yes my happy place. Phew. Ok anyhow. So I read some of the responses just out of freakish morbid curiosity. One post written by some INBRED GEORGIAN HICK said and I quote (That is if you can quote blasphemous sayings) "Raptors are way smarter than Aliens. They'd kick their asses before they knew what hit them!." OBVIOUSLY you foolish hick they are MUCH MUCH less intelligent than Aliens. In Jurrasic Park a raptor goes through a hole in the wall. Whoop de la de freaking do! When a mouse goes through a hole in the wall do we say! "My God that is one smartass mouse!" NO! we DON'T However when a mouse gets 30 of his buddies, cuts the power to your area then finds their way around dual sentry guns and drop through the ceiling upon their prey THEN YOU'VE GOT INTELLIGENCE! And a second thing even if a raptor DID sneak up on an alien (extremely unlikely) and manages to hit him. Then what happens? Well the raptor gets a nice face full of molecular acid. This of course promptly eats through the raptors skull turning it into a rather unpleasant to look at mess on the floor. And Raptors, what do they have for natural weaponry and abilities? Can they climb on walls? NO, have they got a powerful bladed tail? NO, do they have a secondary jaw that can punch through a human skull? NO, do they have razor sharp claws NO...uh well actually yes but THE POINT STILL STANDS. The idiotic idea that RAPTORS could beat the MOST PERFECT, GREATEST, MOST TERRIFYING SPECIES EVER CREATED is foolish in the extreme. |