Irony

1. Tiger Woods is teeing off from the first hole at Atlanta. He turns to his caddy and says, "I must take up this game seriously some day". (His words are ironic because Tiger Woods is a top professional - if he doesn't take the game seriously, nobody does! Tiger is being ironic intentionally to be humorous. He knows anyone listening will take his words as ironic.)
2. A man is committing suicide. Before jumping off the ledge of the balconey of his 12th floor hotel room he rings room-service and orders a meal. He then jumps to his death. (It is ironic that a man who is about to die should order a meal he does not intend to eat. The irony is clearly intentional, although we cannot explain it, we do not know why he did it.)
3. A man has lost his job, and has no money left. He decides to take his own life because he cannot face a life of poverty. As he jumps off the 12th floor of his apartment building, a messenger is on his way up in the lift with a telegram to say he has won a million rand in the sweepstakes. (His suicide isa ironic because we know that he does not need to do it. He is in fact rich. The man is not aware of the irony though, he believes he is poor. No irony is intended, and only we know his act is ironic.)
4. A student does no work the whole year, and spots for the exam. They study only Algebra, thinking Geometry will never come up. When he opens the exam paper he sees that the first question is on Geometry. "Great!" he says. (The student's words are ironic - it is not "great" at all!)
5. A woman has just lost her boyfriend and feels very depressed. She decides to go and watch a movie to cheer herself up. She likes eddie Murphy's humour and sees a film with Eddie Murphy in it. She choses to watch that movie - Eddie Murphy's only tragic role about a man who breaks up with his girl! (the irony lies in the fact that she chose a tragic movie thinking it was a comedy.)

1. A boy has just opened his lunch-box expecting to find some cake his mother made the day before. Instead he finds peanut-butter sandwhiches, which he hates!
2. A teacher standing in front of a class which has just done very badly in a test, ready to hand back the scripts.
3. A beggar standing in front of a BMW at an intersection, approaches the car and ....
4. A porter in an hotel is given a 2c tip by a millionaire patron.
5. A dog comes up and wees on your shoe.

Sarcasm

• A student has failed an exam. When handing the paper back, the teacher says,"Well done!" (The words are ironic, because the student did not do well, but they are sarcastic because the teacher meant to ridicule the student.)
• A waiter spills a man's coffee in his lap. The man says,"Thank you!" (the words are ironic because you would not expect someone who has been hurt to say thank you, but they are also sarcastic because the man is intentionally mocking the waiter.)
• A man jumps a queue. A woman he has rudely pushed past says to hi, "No I insist, after you!" (She is being ironic because the man was not not waiting for permission, but she is also specifically being sarcastic because she intended to shame the man.)

1. A woman steps on your toes.
2. A friend borrows a pen, and then puts it in her/his own pocket.
3. A friend sits in your usual place at school.
4. A dog eats your supper when you aren't looking.
5. It starts raining just as you finish washing your clothes.
6. The teacher announces a test which you got 100% for won't "count" .
7. The one day you wake up late, the bus comes early!
8. Your teachers work on through a teachers' strike.
9. You get a pimple on the day of the matric dance.
10. The bell rings just after you had to give a speech for which you were not prepared.