I can c why you didn't want me reading your journal, oh well atleast I know what you really think of me know although I wasn't going to to email u at all and I don't know why Im that surpised since u always badmouth becky, the dawns and lee ann to me I figured I'd shudder to think what you say of me to them and now I know. I'm really hurt you'd paste emails and IMs I sent to u on the web, makes me not want to ever im or email u again for fear it'll become fodder just good no one i know prob reads it presumably and evne so wouldnt know it was me. All we can ever do is agree to disagree after all. I wasnt trying to say you're the worst singer I've ever heard or that people can't say they didn't like you, I'm just saying I think some of the people may've only told me that cause they knew I was a virgin to be n ice so maybe we couldn't take what they said too seriously, IC why you went without me afterall. I didn't expect you'd have fun going into it afterall not knowing the bands just that you wouldn't want to talk thru it all so i couldnt hear than i wasnt as intersted in them as foreginger after all and thinking u werent having fun and i dragged u just cause u were bored and it was free and something to do as you yourself said that i would try to keep you company cause u know how silence makes me uncomfortable. I am not saying I never did anything wrong at my internship but you shouldve seen the way the lady treated me there as well, i wasnt trying to be the victim but she did have the responisiblity when she hired me so if i didnt work out the way she planned it was partially her fault she never told me very clearly what she wanted and like mom and amy said they made a lot of judgments on me in 6 days. i think you're just jealous and have basically admitted it yourself that u feel bad that becky and i have graduated before u hgave when she has and i havent and that of course makes you feel superior to me cause your smarter and shouldve and couldve in four years had u not had to take a break. it makes me sick to think after all the times ive tried to b there for u, you'd think so little of me. The main reason why i've had so much trouble finding internships is because there aren't much local media, they blew me off cuase i didnt drive, i applied after switching majors the summer before last so i dint have many clips than i was only looking last summer and this summer and dint look much than cause of my trip. although i really shouldnt even b emailing u cause you'll prob just post it to your journal.