This article submitted by Hannnah aka Manicstreethamster
After his best friends get all maternal, James decides to give motherhood a go.
James: My contractions have started.
Nicky: (girlishly) Ooh, ooh! Oh my God, Oh my God!
Sean:(heroically pulling up sleeves) Stand back - I'll deliver this baby!
Nicky: (pushing Sean out the way) Shut up, you fat oaf. Remember your breathing James...now push, damn you, push!
James: Nrrgh!!
Sean: Ooh, I see a head! I think it's a boy - wow, a BIG boy!
James:That's mine, you idiot!
Nicky: (camply hopping from one foot to the other, waving hands) Ooh, I'm getting all emotional!
Doctor: Here you are, Mr Bradfield. Your healthy baby son. Oh no, Mr Bradfield! You can't eat him! That's right, just breastfeed him gently...
Sean: A-coochie-coochie-coo!
Nicky: Hey James, what will you call him?
James: Richey of course, after his father. (fights back tears)
Nicky: (sympathetically) Come on James, you're a single mother now. You'll meet another man one day, in time.
James: (sighs) I know. I just wish Richey were here.
Doctor: (removing mask) Ta-da! Surprise!
All: Richey!!!!!!
Wend your way to the Severn Bridge