Written by: Yutaka
Categoly: Narration
Mark: A-

The importance of affinity

Affinity is the fact that we have people with whom we can get along well and people with whom we cannot. It does not mean someone is right or wrong, but it means we have congenial people to do something with. The differences between those people might be caused by their character, tastes, and skills. If we want to live comfortably, we should be aware the importance of affinity.

In September, I started my Canadian college experience at Camosun College. At the beginning of the year, I took a basic composition course in English. The teacher of the course had a good reputation, as far as I knew. And that was the reason I chose the teacher, for I had to choose teachers carefully as an international student who had handicap in English. I thought I chose a suitable teacher for me.

The first day, she appeared in the classroom and gave us some instructions. I found her character and teaching style rather reasonable although she spoke at a very fast speed. I thought that I could survive in the class. One strange thing about her was I could not figure out where she was looking although she was looking somewhere in the classroom because when she spoke, her eyes became so thin and formed the shape of caterpillars. Looking at her obscure black lines on her face, I did not think this was the omen of a bad affinity yet although these kinds of feeling often foreshadow unpleasant future.

The third day, the teacher showed up and asked us to exchange our letter-writing assignments and peer edit them. As we were sitting in the class with our desks arranged in groups, she came to me first and stared upon my resume. She said,

“What is this?”

I answered that it was my assignment. In the previous class, she had told us we could write any kind of business letter we wanted, so I thought a resume was acceptable. However, it was out of the question. Her face became increasingly stiff, and she said,

“I said ‘write a letter’. This is not a letter. Why did you write this?”

Probably I had misunderstood what she meant the other day because of my poor listening skill. I explained why I wrote the paper, but she never heard me and asked me the same question three times. Each time I explained the reason, but it meant nothing to her. Finally she really lost her temper, hit my desk, left me without saying anything, and went to another group, like a little child who doesn’t know what to do with anger. She seems unbearable to be misunderstood. However, understanding what teachers say exactly in detail is very difficult for me. To sun up, the teacher might not be good at teaching international students.

Later she came back and suddenly picked up a red pen from my pen case and started writing something on my notebook. She said,

“You don’t understand me at all by listening, so I will write it down”.

Her face was tormented with terrible emotion; her hand was shaking with anger. Her reaction surprised me, and I could not speak. I barely said,

“Thank you”.

At the end of the class, I went to the teacher with my friend who was my classmate. We were supposed to rewrite our letters with advice from our peers, so I asked her if I could have my friend edit the letter I was going to write. She accepted my request and started making excuses that she had many students and could not handle someone who did not understand her well. Then my friend talked to her that she could offer to help me with my assignment. The teacher started explaining to her about how I should write a letter she wanted. Their conversations showed resemblance to ones that is done between a teacher and a mother in a kindergarten. Although this situation was caused by my lack of listening skill, I did not feel I was fairly treated.

The fourth day, after we submitted our revised letters, we learned different learning styles each person has. The teacher gave us a piece of paper that would show us our characteristics of learning styles by filling out blanks and calculating numbers. From the results of the analysis we found that because each person has his or her own ways of learning, we should learn from a teacher who has similar ways of learning so we could learn efficiently. Learning from those teachers must be easier to understand. The idea shows affinity between a student and a teacher affect the efficiency of learning.

The fifth day, we received the evaluated letter assignments. I picked up my letter from its envelope and read the evaluation. The score was not too bad, but her comment said,

“You learned so little from this assignment. I hope the whole class isn’t wasting time”.

This comment sounded more than what it said. I could imagine her disconsolate feeling and gloomy fear. After thinking for a while, I decided to withdraw from the course over looking at the letter. I could have continued the course; however, I preferred to have a teacher who is suitable for me.

The next day I went to the teacher’s office to tell her that I was withdrawing from the class. Having her office door opened, she was writing something facing to her desk. When I greeted her, she asked me how she could help me. I told her my determination calmly. After a moment of silence, without showing surprise on her face, she said quietly,

“I think it was really nice of you”.

She told me that she was grateful about it and excused herself having let me down. Then, she explained that she had had terrible experience in her childhood that adults had not understood what she had said; therefore, still now if someone did not understand her, she could not stand it. Realization came to me why her anger seemed excessive to me. She was willing to show me another teacher who had experience teaching English Second Language courses. We parted happily with a handshake. The decision of the withdrawal will probably create pleasant circumstances both for the teacher and for me. I learned the importance of affinity through this experience.