Subject: The Spinster's Will

A good lawyer knows the law.
A great lawyer knows the judge!


> An elderly spinster called the lawyer's office and told the
> receptionist she wanted to see the lawyer about having a will
> prepared.  The receptionist suggested they set up an appointment
> for a convenient time for the spinster to come into the office.
> The woman replied, "You must understand, I've lived alone all
> my life, I rarely see anyone, and I don't like to go out.  Would
> it be possible for the lawyer to come to my house?"
>
> The receptionist checked with the attorney who agreed and he
> went to the spinster's home for the meeting to discuss her estate
> and the will.  The lawyer's first question was, "Would you please
> tell me what you have in assets and how you'd like them to be
> distributed under your will?"
>
> She replied, "Besides the furniture and accessories you see here,
> I have $40,000 in my savings account at the bank."
>
> "Tell me," the lawyer asked, "how would you like the $40,000 to
> be distributed?"
>
> The spinster said, "Well, as I've told you, I've lived a reclusive
> life, people have hardly ever noticed me, so I'd like them to
> notice when I pass on. I'd like to provide $35,000 for my funeral."
>
> The lawyer remarked, "Well, for $35,000 you will be able to have
> a funeral that will certainly be noticed and will leave a lasting
> impression on anyone who may not have taken much note of you! But
> tell me," he continued, "what would you like to do with the
> remaining $5,000?"
>
> The spinster replied, "As you know, I've never married, I've
> lived alone almost my entire life, and in fact I've never slept
> with a man.  Before I die, I'd like you to use the $5,000 to
> arrange for a man to sleep with me."
>
> "This is a very unusual request," the lawyer said, adding, "but
> I'll see what I can do to arrange it and get back to you."  That
> evening, the lawyer was at home telling his wife about the eccentric
> spinster and her weird request.  After thinking about how much she
> could do around the  house with $5,000, and with a bit of coaxing,
> she got her husband to agree to provide the service himself.

> She said, "I'll drive you over tomorrow morning, and wait in the
> car until you're finished." The next morning, she drove him to the
> spinster's house and waited while he went into the house.  She waited
> for over an hour, but her husband didn't come out. So she blew the car horn.
>
> Shortly, the upstairs bedroom window opened, the lawyer stuck
> his head out and yelled, "Pick me up tomorrow!  She's going to
> let the County bury her!"