Only one person could stop the gay and lesbian demons from Hell. That was a Catholic priest that was about to be fried in the electric chair, for murder and fondling a young boy. What happened was, a Catholic priest put his hands down the pants of a 12 year old altar boy, when the boy's father walked in and caught him. The boy's father was so upset, he pulled out a gun and tried to shoot the priest. At that split second, the priest realized that he needed to defend himself, so he pulled out an AK47, and shot the boy's father dead, a shooting that was justified for self defense. When the state's attorney found out that the priest fondled a young boy, he filed charges against him for fondling the young boy and murder. He succeeded at having him convicted. The priest was sentenced to death.

        An organization called, "Crusaders Against Repression of Sexual Minorities", CARSM was aware that, that Catholic priest had special powers to get rid of gay demons. A CARSM spokesperson asked the Governor to give the priest, Father Paul, not only a stay of execution, but a full pardon from prison. The Governor decided to give Father Paul a temporary stay of execution, if he would get rid of the gay demons. The Governor called Father Paul and asked him if he would get rid of the gay demons. Father Paul said, "Are you going to give me a full pardon from prison"? The Governor said "no". Father Paul said, "then I'm not going to destroy the gay demons". The Governor said, "they could destroy the world". Father Paul said, "I don't give a fuck". The Governor said, "don't talk to me like that, or I'll fry you in the electric chair this minute". Father Paul said, "go ahead and fry me, asshole, then this planet is doomed because I am the only person that can save this planet from the gay demons". At that point, the governor hung up the phone on Father Paul and didn't know what to do. Then, the Governor decided to give Father Paul a hearing before a parole board and here's what went on there:

Parole Board: Father Paul, do you have any remorse about murdering the boy's father?

Father Paul: no

PB: Do you think that fondling that boy was inappropriate behavior?

FP: Not at all, and I'm proud of it. I only wish I had a chance to fuck him.

PB: Why did you shoot the boy's father?

FP: Because he was a fucking asshole, prick, with shit for brains and this world can do       without people like him. Besides, he tried to shoot me.

PB: If you were released from prison, would you ever kill anyone again?

FP: If they're a fucking asshole and try to fuck with me, I will.

PB: If we release you, what would you do to benefit society?

FP: Get rid of the gay demons, you fuckin' imbecile.

     Even though Father Paul could get rid of the gay demons, the Parole Board would not let him out of prison, because they didn't like his attitude.

     Meanwhile, some lesbian demons managed to make it all the way to Tallahassee. Then one broke into the Governor's mansion, without him knowing it and a lesbian demon bit the tits off his 19 year old daughter and fatally ate out her pussy. When that happened, the Governor called Father Paul and offered to give him a full pardon, Father Paul placed another demand on the governor. He asked him to abolish every repressive law against sexual minorities including age of consent laws and prostitution. After Father Paul made that demand, the Governor said, "I can't do that. There is no way that the state legislature is going to approve of abolishing age of consent laws and legalize prostitution". Father Paul said, "then you can kiss all humans goodbye, asshole because the gay demons will take over and kill everyone". After that, the Governor said, "ok I'll get rid of every repressive law against sexual minorities, no matter what it takes, but I do have to ask you one more question before I agree to pardon you. Do you want rape to be legalized"? Father Paul said, "no you stupid fuckin moron, rape is an act of violence that is forced upon someone and there is no fucking way I would ever want it to be legalized". The Governor said, "ok then, I will pardon you, but you better destroy all those gay demon bastards"!

       Father Paul mixed up the formula that would destroy the gay demons: which consisted of thousands of used condoms, preferably from gay men, holy water, piss imported from the Pope, and that very secret ingredient, that wouldn't work from anyone else; Father Paul's own piss. Father Paul had to light all those used condoms on fire. After he lit the fire, he had one more ingredient to put in. He had to beat off and cum in the fire. After the fire got started, the smoke from all those condoms went up into the atmosphere and then God would act, by causing it to rain. The rain would cause all the gay and lesbian demons to melt.

       Father Paul got the fire going, but would it be fast enough for the Governor? After the lesbian demon killed the Governor's daughter, she tried to kill his wife. His wife managed to run from the lesbian demon. She ran into the bathroom and locked herself in, but the lesbian demon tried to break down the bathroom door. Then, the governor whipped out his dick and pissed all over the lesbian demon. That was enough to knock her out, but not stop her.

      Just then, it started raining. The Governor asked, "how can this special rain kill gay demons when they're indoors"? Then he figured something out. Put a bucket outside and the rain will go into the bucket. Then bring the bucket in the house and throw the water on them. Oh.

      Then, just before it started raining, a gay male demon, who was John, managed to break into the Governor's mansion. The rain destroyed all the gay demons, except for the 2 that were in the Governor's mansion, which were John and the lesbian demon. The Governor saw John, so he ran out to get the bucket of water. Just then, John tried to bite the dick off the Governor's 13 year old son, Eric. John chased Eric into a corner and he was trapped. Just then, the Governor threw the bucket of water on John and he melted.

     Meanwhile, his wife thought it was safe to come out of the bathroom. but the lesbian demon was regaining consciousness. The Governor said, "oh shit, I have no more water". He said to Eric, "take out your dick and piss all over her and hurry". Eric was freaked out that his father asked him to do that, but he pissed all over her and that knocked her out, temporarily. Lesbian demons can not stand to be pissed on, unless a woman pisses on them. Meanwhile, the Governor had to put the bucket outside and wait for the rain to fill the bucket. Just as the lesbian demon was regaining consciousness, there was enough water in the bucket, so he threw the bucket of water on the lesbian demon and she melted.

      Action 5 News did a report on how Father Paul got rid of the gay demons and reporter Linda Grotto asked him some questions, such as, "What do you plan to do with your life now"? "Open an orphanage, for homeless boys". Linda asked, "are you planning on abusing those boys"? Father Paul said, "fuck off, you fucking cunt. I love boys, don't you dare accuse me of abusing them, twat face".

      Father Paul decided to move to Alaska and open that orphanage for homeless boys. The boys found him to be the coolest Catholic priest on the Planet and he always did things to make sure that the boys felt good, as well as himself. Father Paul, a Catholic priest you'll get to love because he's the coolest and he swears a lot. Also, after Father Paul left Florida, a lesbian demon was left behind, in Linda's house, uh oh. THE END

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