Today, I am going to talk about something that "normal" people talk about, like baseball. I will never forget the time when I saw my 1st baseball game. It was on June 9, 1976 when I was in the 6th grade and I went on a field trip to see the Chicago Cubs play the Atlanta Braves at Wrigley Field. 1 of the kids that I went with on the field trip was Randy and I remember that he was being real nice to me on the way to the ballgame, but Randy was a scumbag and he was someone who I couldn't trust and his mother should have had an abortion! Randy was 1 of the bullies who picked on and tormented me. I was looking forward to seeing the baseball game, but 1 of the things that happened to me when I was growing up is whenever I looked forward to something, things would end up turning to shit. People told me that nothing tastes better than eating a hotdog at a baseball game, so I order the hotdog and it came with mustard on it. I hate mustard and I HATE it when people put that fucking shit on my hotdog! Another thing is the Chicago Cubs lost that day 2-0 from the Atlanta Braves.
I don't know if any of you know this, but did you know that Wrigley Field is located right in the middle of Newtown and a lot of homosexuals live in that neighborhood? I remember going down Clark Street on the way back from the baseball game and that street has a lot of gay bars and gay bath houses. Something seemed peculiar about that neighborhood, but no one bothered to notify me of that at the time. Do you know that some baseball players are gay? That's why it is important to have a baseball stadium in the middle of a gay neighborhood because it makes it convenient for a gay baseball player to visit a gay bath house because he might have a burning desire to find a man who will be willing to suck his cock!
Anyway, another thing is Randy decided to stop being nice to me and act like a fucking asshole by harassing and tormenting me on the way back from the baseball game. Randy bought this Chicago Cubs pencil with a plastic Chicago Cubs hat at the end of it and he decided to hit me over the head with it repeatedly. Things had gotten to the point that I couldn't take it anymore, so I got up, walked up to Randy and to his surprise, I took my fist and I bashed his fucking head in! Thankfully, a teacher who was there was on my side, so she confiscated Randy's Chicago Cubs pencil and she gave it to me! That teacher was way cooler than the other teacher I had when I was in the 6th grade who told me that I brought it upon myself when I got picked on by bullies and the reason that she said that is because she was a fucking cunt! The thing that makes me feel good about all this is someone decided to fuck with me and he got to suffer the consequences!
A discussion about baseball generally ain't that interesting, unless Pat talks about and this is also part of his spoken words moving more towards storytelling. About 75% of Pat's spoken word performances in the future will probably be storytelling because he has a lot of deep personal shit to share with the world, which is why you need to continue reading, Pat's 2004 vision of the World Page and there is a good chance that you will learn something useful for a change!