Oh what an exciting time this is as it is time to find out who will be selected to be the 2008 American Idol and I just found out that the new American Idol is Tiffany Shmuntz! Tiffany's happiness at fame and fortune was short lived. 1 day Tiffany was sitting on the toilet trying to take a shit when she noticed that she couldn't as she was severely constipated. The best that she could do was blow a few farts. She took some laxatives and she was finally able to take a shit. About a week later she was constipated again and even laxatives wouldn't work. She was in so much excruciating pain, she had to go to the emergency room when she found out that she had a severe case of colon cancer. She had to have most of her colon removed, but it that's not all, Tiffany was going to have to start wearing a colostomy bag!

    Not only is American Idol the most horrible music that I have heard in my life, but people involved with that shit are a bunch of phony backstabbing assholes such as Tiffany's so called "friend" Karen who told her that she would be there for her if she needed someone to talk to. Tiffany decided to eat a lot of burritos before a concert. She was singing a song called Jesus Gave me Cancer Because he Loves Me and her colostomy bag filled up so fast, causing it to bust open causing fecal matter to splatter all over the stage and some of it even hit people in the audience. Tiffany was so embarrassed and upset, she decided to go over to Karen's house and Karen said "get the fuck out of my house, you colostomy bag freak." She slipped into a deep depression, so she started taking Prozak, but that only made her feel worse, so she decided that she was going to kill herself. Tiffany swallowed an entire bottle of Prozac and then she decided to wash it down by drinking a bottle of Jack Daniels! All that did was knock her out for awhile, but when she woke up, she saw an image of GG Allin in the sky and he said, "hi Tiffany, I was looking down when I saw your colostomy bag break. I was so turned on, I pulled down my pants and jerked off. Karen is a fucking cunt! You need to make her pay for what she did to you and remember, I am your friend!" Tiffany went over to Karen's house, snuck up on her and wrapped her colostomy bag with fecal matter and all around her face and suffocated her! It didn't take the police long to know that Tiffany was a suspect in Karen's homicide and Officer Fergesson tried to arrest her, but she lunged at him with her colostomy bag, so he shot her in the head. Officer Fergason loves shooting people with his gun, so he decided to celebrate by eating some doughnuts! When he reached for the doughnut, he noticed that it smelled like shit and there was fecal matter all over it. Then Tiffany's colostomy bag wrapped itself around his face and suffocated him. There's a killer colostomy bag on the loose and no 1 can stop it!

In this fucked up world loaded with uptight fucking assholes, people need to hear a story like this!  When Pat was a kid, he saw a movie called Babe, which was about some tennis player or some woman athlete.  He can't remember at this point, but she got colon cancer and she had to wear a colostomy bag.  It was so depressing.  Not only that, it was "serious".  Serious things suck!  It's more fun to read things that are in bad taste and it will cause people who are cool to laugh!  Also, serious people are a bunch of uptight fucking assholes, but cool people will continue to read Pat's 2008 Vision of the World Page, which will cause you laughter while informing you of important issues that make this world suck.