By Noelle Morrow

Standard disclaimer applies. Paramount owns it,

I have fun with it. Don't steal it from either of us.

JADZIA

Worf had been on DS9 for a full year, and I still hadn't told him how I felt. I have no idea what I was waiting for; each time we were together, I kept thinking, *This isn't the right time*. Well, one day, my time ran out.

~~~~

"It is the power of his voice, the strength of his intonation that make Baraq Kadan a great singer. There are none like him."

I took a seat across from Worf on the replimat, where we were sharing our usual morning drinks and conversation, "None as boring anyway."

Worf frowned; I had just insulted his favorite Klingon performer. "He never varies his performance, not even by a half tone."

"I prefer traditional opera performed in the traditional manner," he explained.

"You know, Worf , for a Klingon who was raised by Humans, wears a Starfleet uniform-- and drinks prune juice-- you're pretty attached to tradition," I gave Worf the smile that had lately been reserved only for him, "But that's okay, I like a man riddled with contradiction," I took a sip from my cup, never letting my eyes leave his. Worf's attention was drawn away from me and to the airlock behind me. He set his glass down and his mouth gaped open. I noticed what he was looking at, and commented on it, "That's a welcome sight. The peace talks must be going well if the Klingons are back on the station." Worf was paying me no attention what so ever. He got up from the table while I was still talking, "Worf?"

Worf's gaze was on the three Klingons that just boarded. One was a elderly man, one a young man and the third was a woman, about our age. "Did you see her?" he said, his voice was awestruck.

"The Klingon woman," I stated flatly.

"She was glorious..." Worf left the replimat and walked after them. No, this can't be happening. I slowly stood from the table and followed him. I kept telling myself that this was not what I thought it was.

When I caught up to him, he was standing outside of Quark's, looking in at her.

"Her? She's okay," I said, putting as much sarcasm and levity as I could in my voice. My head peaked over his shoulder to get a good look at her.

"I have never seen such a woman. Who is she? What house is she from? I do not recognize her family crest."

The woman got up, and Worf changed his position so that he could continue to watch her from a distance. Of course, I followed. The Klingon woman warmly greeted Quark, wrapping her arms around him in a tight embrace. I looked up and saw Worf's jaw grind, something he did when he was not pleased, "She is a friend of the Ferengi."

Grilka. That's Grilka.

"Now I remember who she is. Her name is Grilka and she's not just Quark's friend. She's his ex- wife."

Worf looked at me, then back to the two of them, and I could see his jawbone moving under his skin. He let out a low groan, and turned quickly to leave. I almost had to run to keep up with him, "Worf!"

He stopped, and turned to me, "What?"

"What is wrong with you?" I asked, trying to suppress my annoyance.

"Nothing," he said curtly.

"Okay..."

We stepped onto the turbolift and he ordered it to ops. At first it was silent, then Worf spoke up, "How does she know Quark?"

"Quark killed her husband.

"Quark killed a Klingon?"

The doors opened and we entered ops, "Yes. And even though it was an accident, Quark took credit for killing Grilka's husband."

I stood with Worf at his station.

"Why?" he asked.

"As a way of boosting business at the bar, and it worked. But then Grilka kidnapped Quark and took him back to the Klingon homeworld and married him."

"Why?"

"I'm getting to that," I said haughtily, "As a woman, Grilka was forbidden to lead her house. By marrying Quark, she could retain control through him. Eventually, she convinced the council to give her control and she divorced Quark on the spot. As far as I know that's the last time they saw each other."

"A marriage of convenience," Worf stated.

"Certainly for Grilka, but I'm not sure how convenient it was for Quark."

"His opinion is of no consequence. He is not worthy of such a prize as she."

I folded my arms and tried my best to conjure up some joviality, "Worf, it sounds like you have a bad case of par'mach."

Just then Benjamin came out of his office.

"Is that contagious?" he asked, tossing his baseball to me. I walked over to him to return it.

"Par'mach is the Klingon word for love, but with more aggressive overtones."

"Love?" Ben asked, "Worf?"

"Stranger things have happened," I said.

"Especially around here."

With Ben gone, I took a long look at Worf and sighed. This was a mess, and it was all my fault. Now, Worf's enamored with some woman he doesn't even know, and I'm alone, with nothing but my own bad case of par'mach to keep me company.

WORF

"I am a fool," I declared.

"You're in love... which I suppose is the same thing," Dax and I were in the Defiant's mess hall. I had just come from Quark's where I made an absolute mockery of myself and Grilka. I foolishly tried to engage traditional Klingon courtship customs by challenging Grilka's body guard. Something possessed me to believe that she could actually have an interest in me, and her elder, Tumek, abruptly proved me wrong.

"You're making too much of this Worf," Dax stood with her foot propped up on the stool next to me, "Tumek said that Grilka wasn't offended, she was probably flattered."

"There is no flattery in a great lady being courted by a traitor," I replied harshly.

Dax slowly took a seat across from me, "Is that what's really bothering you? Or is it that Tumek said that you didn't know anything about Klingon women, and you're afraid he's right."

I turned my eyes from her. That is exactly what was bothering me. I had absolutely no experience with genuine, traditional Klingon women. K'Ehleyr was very much against Klingon ways, Ba'el knew nothing of them and Deanna... Can I really include her? After all, we were never really together. I decided not to think about that right now.

The door to the mess hall opened and Quark stepped in, "What do you want?" I snapped at him.

"I want to talk to Dax, if that's all right with you."

I did not object, but I let out a loud groan, just so he'd know that it was not all right. He invited himself to a seat at our table, "I need help," he said to her. She rolled her eyes, "Grilka invited me to dinner and I need to brush up on Klingon manner and protocol--"

"She invited you to dinner!" I exclaimed.

"In her quarters, a private dinner, a *very* private dinner."

I stood up with an audible huff. This was an outrage! Grilka would have nothing to do with me, yet she was socializing with a Ferengi!

"What's wrong with him?" Quark asked her.

"He's having a bad day."

"Oh, that's a shame," Quark responded, not at all concerned with my mood. The two of them spoke, but I was not really listening. Instead, I slumped over in the corner, trying to figure out where all this was coming from. I did not even know Grilka, we'd never said two words to each other, yet there was something about her, something mesmerizing. I had always imagined one day getting married. Long ago I was certain it would be to K'Ehlayr, but after she died I stopped thinking about it. Lately, the idea had been popping in my head, and seeing Grilka, well, she was glorious. She would make any man a fine mate, so why not me?

I caught a piece of their conversation. Dax was trying to explain to Quark the intricacies of Klingon relationships, and I interjected, "Grilka is from the Mekravok region," I had done some checking, "It is customary among her people that the man bring a leg of linta to the first courtship dinner. Make sure it's fresh, as if you have just killed it," I came back to where they were standing. My face and voice showed my excitement, it was as if *I* were having dinner with her tonight, "Then use the leg to sweep aside everything on the table and declare in a loud voice, I have brought you this, From this day I wish to provide food for you and your house, all I ask is to share your company and do honor to your name."

Quark looked skeptical, and Dax wore an unusually reverent gaze, "Then what?" he asked.

Dax answered for me, "Well, either she accepts your offer, or she has her body guard shatter every bone in your body."

"Sounds reasonable," Quark left, and Dax looked up at me. She looked sympathetic, and though I usually do not like sympathy, it was okay from her.

"Are you okay?"

I paced the room, "Yes, of course."

"I'm sure it isn't easy for you to watch Quark--"

"I am fine," I said calmly.

"Okay," she paused, "I know you'd rather be having dinner with Grilka, but, I'm always available."

Dax was the best friend I had. She was always around, when I needed her and even when I didn't. I smiled at her, "Of course."

She returned the smile, "You know, Worf, there are lot of women out there. Just because things didn't fly between you and Grilka doesn't mean the world is over."

"I have a feeling *you* have never experienced rejection, Dax."

She hung her head, "Believe it or not, there's someone right now that I want to be with that couldn't care less about me."

I frowned. What fool could possibly pass up the chance to be with Jadzia Dax? If I even thought there was a one in a trillion opportunity, I would jump at it, "Who could possibly be that senseless?"

"Senseless?" she asked, smiling.

I suddenly felt very uncomfortable. I answered her very stodgily, "You are fine woman, Dax, whoever this person is obviously does not realize that."

She blushed and hung her head a bit, "It's no one you know," she mumbled.

Dax looked like this upset her, and I hated to imagine someone breaking her heart. It was nothing new for me to be disappointed, but she did not deserve it. Dax is one of the strongest, most beautiful women I know, but I knew I would only be fooling myself if I thought that she and I could actually have something more than friendship. We are just too different.

JADZIA

Things were beginning to look up. Well, maybe, I don't know. As it turned out, Grilka had absolutely no romantic interest in Worf, instead, she and Quark were getting back together. Worf decided to help Quark win Grilka's heart. It was really very noble of him, and even though I should feel bad that Grilka had turned him down, I didn't. Not one bit.

Quark needed both our help. Grilka's bodyguard Thopeck had challenged him to a fight to the death, and, it was certain that Quark would be the one to die. However, I had devised a plan that might spare his life. With the use of neural implants, Worf was going to control Quark's movements, and hopefully, it would save him.

The three of us were in holosuite two testing my devices. Quarks was fighting me, and Worf stood alongside of us, his movements being transmitted to Quark. With just as much ease as Worf, Quark managed to wrestle my weapon from me, rendering me helpless.

"Congratulations," I said to Quark. He had a pained look on his face, "How do you feel?"

"Like a puppet. And I have some complaints for the puppeteer. You nearly wrenched my arm out of its socket."

"The movement would not have hurt if you were in better physical condition," Worf replied.

"Exercise makes me sweat," Quark countered.

I laughed as I deactivated Quark's transmitter. It was carefully hidden under his Ferengi hat, "You need to get some sleep. If your body's tired tomorrow, Worf won't even be able to save you."

"Bedtime," Quark said definitively, and left the holosuite. That left me there with Worf.

"I cannot believe the lengths I am going to for that Ferengi. I'm practically giving him Grilka."

*As if she were yours to give*, I thought. Instead, I approached him and deactivated his transmitter.

"What is it you see in her anyway? I mean, she's attractive, but, other than that?" is what I said. What I wanted to say was, *You don't even know the woman, and you're in love with her. I've been your best friend for a year and you act like I don't exist. And what does she have that I don't?*

"It is everything about her. The way she carries herself, confident and strong. She commands those around her, the proud tilt of her head, the way her face betrays none of her true feelings," Worf was entranced, "The power of her voice... And her eyes, like as hard as sep'her gemstones, and twice as sharp." This was really pathetic, "Sounds like you're describing a statue. What would you do with a woman like that? but her up on a pedestal and clean her every week?"

"You do *not* understand."

Worf was always saying that, little did he know, I understood better than he did. One thing was certain, he was wasting time and emotions on Grilka, the same time and emotions that could be spent on me, "If I were in your shoes, I'd be looking for someone a little more entertaining. A little more fun. And maybe, even a little more attainable."

"You are *not* in my shoes."

"Too bad. You'd be amazed at what I could do in a pair of size eighteen boots."

With that I left. I wasn't sure know how I felt anymore. I was angry, angry that Worf didn't feel the same way about me that I did about him. Why the hell and I wasting my time on Worf anyway? I asked myself that as I headed home. I could be in a nice, stable relationship with Julian right now. What was so great about Worf anyway?

"Everything," I said breathlessly as I leaned against the back of the turbolift. He's powerful, strong, and dominating. He is one of the most selfless and courageous people I know. His voice was mesmerizing, when he spoke gently it was like a hearing the deep ceremonial chords of a Vulcan cello. His eyes, small and as black as the sky were filled with emotion.

Suddenly, I could feel a lump in my throat, and my vision was clouding up. A single tear fell down my cheek, "I can't believe this," I said aloud, "What the hell is wrong with me?" The dark walls of the turbolift didn't answer.

"I can't go on like this. I've got to do something."

WORF

I watched Jadzia leave the holosuite. What was that about? Dax had been acting strangely every since Grilka came aboard, or should I say, stranger than she normally did. She seemed unusually concerned about my feelings for Grilka, and was set on discouraging them. I began to slowly pace the small room. What if *I* am the man she was talking about yesterday? My heart began to quicken, could it be me? All the fond glances, the smiles, the flirty remarks, could Jadzia Dax really want *me*? No, she would have just said it outright, Dax was not shy at all. Maybe she was afraid that I did not feel the same way. If it is true, if Dax does want to be more than friends...

"No, stop fooling yourself," I admonished aloud, "Dax is your friend, nothing more."

JADZIA

The next day I was still angry. Not at Worf, at myself. I spent the previous night feeling sorry for myself and drowning those sorrows in a old bottle of blood wine. My head was pounding, and the three cups of raktajino I had this morning hadn't done much to help. When I got to the holosuite, Worf was already there.

"I thought you weren't going to come," he said, referring to my tardiness.

"I'm here aren't I?" my annoyance was obvious, "I just want to get this over with."

Worf frowned, "Are you alright?"

"Fine. Come here," As I attached the transmitter to his neck, my lips were pressed into a firm line and my eyes were narrow, "Give me this," I ordered harshly, referring to his sash.

Worf took it off and draped it over my arm, "Are you sure there is nothing--"

"I told you I was fine," I cut him off. He looked concerned, but, it passed. I looked down at my tricorder, which was monitoring the holosuite where Quark and Thopeck were, "He's in position," I activated the transmitter and stepped back. Worf began, slowly at first. I watched as his large, yet agile body moved around the room, fighting an invisible opponent. He was sleek, his body was one with the bat'tleh and he was totally focused on the battle.

Then the worse thing that could have possibly happen happened. Worf broke the transmitter. I rushed to his side and picked up the piece that had fallen to the floor. I scanned it for a moment, "You damaged the optronic relay." "Can you fix it?" he asked.

"I don't know."

I kneeled on the floor, trying not to think about how Quark was faring. Worf stood at the wall and scanned he other room, "I do not know how, but he is still alive," Worf turned to me, "You must work faster."

"I'm going as fast as I can," I snapped. If Quark's life weren't at risk, I would have left Worf right there to fix it himself. After a few tense minutes, I was able to patch it up, "Come here."

He obeyed, and I reattached the device to his neck, "No showing off this time, Worf, just get it over with" I ordered as he began fighting again.

"I was not showing off!"

He had been showing off, because once I'd reactivated the device, he defeated Thopeck with ease. It was over. Worf had saved Quark's life and now Quark and Grilka were probably ready to ravage one another.

I didn't feel any better. If anything, I felt worse. Angrier. No, angry isn't the right word. I was frustrated.

"Congratulations," I barked as I took the transmitter off of him, "You did it."

"What does she see in that parasite?" Worf grumbled.

I was *so* sick of hearing about Grilka, "Who knows? But they're on the same wavelength, and at least *Quark* can see an opportunity when it's standing in front of him."

"He would have to be blind not to see it," Worf turned his back and walked away from me.

That's it. I've had it. I want Worf, and I'm going to have him. I decided right then and there to put forth all my frustration and anger and focus on what I want, and if Worf didn't feel the same way, I would just have to *make* him.

"Movak, Aki, Rustak."

Worf turned quickly and stared hard and confused at me.

"Computer," I said, my voice filled with abandon and determination, "Bat'tleh."

A Klingon sword appeared in mid air and I gripped it firmly. Once it was in hand, I repeated the words, Klingon words of love, passion and desire. Worf looked into my eyes, probably to see if I was serious. I was indeed, dead serious.

Quicker than I expected, Worf responded to me. We continued the words, traditional words that meant only one thing. Our bat'leths crashed against one another, until finally, I knocked his from his hand, gripped his forearm, and forcefully flipped him onto his back...

~~~~

We were quiet for a long time, trying to regain some form of composure. We were both in a state of shock, what just happened was amazing, more than amazing, *extraordinary*. Finally I stood. I wanted to face him, but I didn't. Instead, I quietly began to put my uniform back on. He put his on as well, our eyes never met, and not a word was said. So much had changed so fast. We could never go back to being 'buddies,' it just wouldn't be the same. And if we could no longer be friends, we had only two choices. Lovers or nothing. I definitely didn't want the latter, but the first seemed so out of reach, even after what had just happened.

I slung his heavy sash over my arm and finally our eyes met. We stood before one another, fully dressed, and not knowing what to say.

"We're going to be sore for quite sometime..." I managed to utter.

"Yes... are you okay?"

I touched my ribs, the there pain was returning, "I'll live," My fingers touched his bleeding cheek, "I didn't mean to--"

"It is fine. You were enjoying yourself."

My face turned a bright shade of crimson. I lowered my eyes briefly before speaking again, "Maybe we should go pay Julian a visit."

He nodded, "I agree."

My knees were still weak from what I'd experienced only moments ago. I leaned against him, and he leaned right back. We didn't even notice the people on the promenade staring at us. Something had happened between the two of us, something *much* more than just sex.

~~~

"What happened to you two?" Julian asked as we entered the infirmary. We looked a mess.

"We, um," Worf looked to me, for some clarification as to how he should explain this.

"Well, um, if you must know, uh--"

"No," Julian put his hand up, "No, I don't need that image either. In fact, I'm going to stop asking that question all together. People can come in, I will treat them, and that's all. Please, have a seat, I'll be with you in a minute."

I wasn't sure what all that was about. Worf and I went into the next room and took a seat next to one another on the exam table.

Worf began slowly, "You do realize that according to Klingon tradition..."

"According to tradition we have to get married," I finished for him.

"But as you keep insisting, you are not a traditional woman."

I stood before him and patted his chest, "The truth is, Worf, at heart, you're not much of a traditional man."

He paused, "You might be right. How do you wish to proceed?"

My hands played with the loose strands of his hair, "I don't know."

"You must have some idea, you were the..."

"Aggressor," I said, blushing.

"Yes, and now there are questions that must be answered."

I sat on his legs, and wrapped his arms tightly around my bosom, "I don't feel like answering any question," that was the truth. I didn't feel like answering questions because I didn't have any answers. I just wanted to relish the moment and not think about anything serious, "Let's just take it one day at a time, and see what happens."

I could hear Worf grumbling, I knew he wasn't thrilled with my answer. He stood up, forcing me to stand as well. We faced on another, "I, I do not like the, uncertainty, of that arrangement."

I expected as much from him. Worf liked to have everything carefully planned out, I'm sure this whole situation, no matter how magnificent it may have been, was very unsettling for him, "One thing is certain," I began, trying add some levity to our discussion, "You stopped thinking about Grilka."

Worf paused, as if he were trying to remember who she was. Then he let out a loud, jovial laugh. It was so unusual to hear him laugh this joyfully, I had to laugh with him. Worf pulled me close and we hugged one another, "Please tell me that you did not do this *just* to get my mind off of Grilka."

"Of course not, but we can talk about all that later. Right now, I just want to make sure you're okay."

"I am fine," Worf gave me a gentle squeeze, and I winced. He noticed it, "Are *you* okay?"

"Oh, I'll be alright. You got a little rough when you slammed me on the floor."

Worf looked embarrassed, "I am sorry, Jadzia. I lost control, I should have been more--"

"I'm the one who engaged a Klingon, I knew what to expect," we sat on the bed again. I paused, I had just noticed something, "Hey, you just called me Jadzia."

"Yes..."

"You never use my first name. Dax, or Commander, but never Jadzia."

"I think we are on a first name basis now, especially after what just happened."

I hesitated before speaking softly, "Do you regret it?"

Before he could answer, Julian entered, "You know, the two of you really should be more careful. I'd really hate it if one of your 'fights to the death' actually ended that way."

Worf and I exchanged glances. Julian thought we were training. Boy, was *he* ever wrong.

We remained silent as he patched us up. We were still silent as we left the infirmary. I had no idea what to say to him, and I was sure he was in the same situation. So, we walked. There was no set destination, just aimless rooming around the station, with an occasional fond glance.

"You didn't answer me," I finally said.

"Pardon?"

"Do you regret what happened between us?"

Worf didn't hesitate, "No. Not at all."

"I don't either."

"Good," he said.

"Good." I stated, "What does that mean exactly?"

"It means what it says. Good."

I stopped walking and we turned to face one another, "Look, Worf, a lot has happened today. Why don't we both go home and think about how we really feel before we say something we'll regret."

He nodded, "If that is what you think is best..."

"I do. And then, around 2300, come by my quarters. Once our minds are clear, we'll be able to look at this objectively. I don't know about you, but after the amazing experience I just had, I'd say yes to just about anything."

Worf smiled, "I will see you then."

We kissed one another, and parted.

WORF

My whole body tingled. My mind was in a whirlwind, I could hardly believe what had just happened to me. I stood there in the corridor, frozen, finally letting the reality of it all set in. My eyes closed slowly and I sagged against the wall. This morning I was infatuated with a woman who felt nothing for me, and now, I had just made love to Jadzia Dax. I could still feel her gloriously naked body intimately pressed against mine. I could still hear her seductive voice calling my name. Her scent, her soft skin, her beautiful hair, I did not want to forget any of it.

As I walked toward airlock six, I realized that I wanted more than to just not forget it. I wanted it again. I want *her*.

Once I was home, I climbed up on the top bunk and activated the music Jadzia gave me. My eyes were focused on the ceiling, and I thought about her. Even though she has an appreciation for my culture, we are still very different. I am reserved and private, whereas Jadzia is outgoing and open. She probably is not ready for a serious commitment, and I definitely am.

If she and I do engage in a relationship, and it does not work out, I would be losing a wonderful friend. Yet, if I allowed my fear and apprehension guide me, I could be throwing away something I have wanted for so long.

It was so much easier being alone. It might not always be pleasant, but, it was easy. I would now have to be careful about what I say, and what I do. I had no intention of offending or hurting her. I just want to make her happy. She is so exquisite, so amazing. I would have to be careful not to crowd her life, I would prove to her that I could be everything she had ever wanted.

JADZIA

I had wanted this for so long, and now that it was here, I had no idea what to do with it. Worf and I were at a crucial crossroad. We could either go our separate ways, forgetting about this day and, consequently, never being the good friends that we were before, or we could go for it. I was almost certain what Worf would want now. He would not have slept with me if he didn't want to be with me. Klingons don't believe in one night stands, especially not Worf.

So, it was really my decision. Do I want to forge a serious relationship with him? I was also pretty sure he wouldn't go for one of those 'see other people relationships,' the kind I was used to, where I see who I want, and he sees who he wants, and we occasionally meet up to have a night of passionate sex. No, Worf would want all of me, and he had every right to ask it. I consciously had sex with a Klingon, and I knew what that meant before I did it. I'm his now.

That prospect was both frightening and comforting. Being with one person in a serious monogamous relationship was something I hadn't experienced since Torias was married to Nelani. The thought seemed so binding. Yet, at the same time, it was wonderful. The security of knowing that there would always be someone, that Worf would always be around was something that I yearned for. Sure, it's fun flirting with men and taking a different guy home every week, but, I'm coming to a point where I want someone to love.

Love. I could fall in love with Worf. I could fall madly in love with him. Sure, he's not perfect, but neither am I. It was only 2019, and I knew Worf was probably engaged in some deep meditative mok'bara to figure out exactly what he wanted. I'd already decided.

I didn't hear my door slide open later that night. I'd fallen asleep on my couch, all the lights were out, and Worf entered. His heavy hand gently stroked my face, and I woke up smiling, "Hi."

"Hello," came his melodious voice.

"I'm glad you're here."

"As am I."

I swung my legs off the couch and he sat next to me. After taking a few deep breaths, I prepared to speak, but Worf began for me, "I want you," he said bluntly, "I want you to be with me."

My hands cupped his face, and I let my fingers graze his skin, "I want you too."

His shoulders sagged, and I could see the tension melt away, "Thank you."

I laughed, "You don't have to *thank* me. I kind of like the idea of being your par'machai."

"I have wanted this for a long time."

"I've wanted you too, Worf. Why didn't you *say* anything?"

"Why did you not?" he countered.

I blushed, "I didn't think you felt the same way."

"Neither did I."

I rose from my seat and took his hands in mine, "Why don't we go to bed, and get a good night's sleep. I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted, and I would love to fall asleep next to you."

Worf stood and scooped me up in his powerful arms. He carried me to my bed where he gently laid me down. We undressed ourselves, and slid our bare bodies under the blankets. As we drifted off to sleep in each others arms, I felt greatly compelled to whisper, "I love you." I didn't, though. I wasn't ready. At least not yet.

~finis