Removal Van.


Evil Removal Men get their comeuppence.

Removal Van. The Removal Van turned right and immediately everybody started reading the house numbers. "Six� eight� ten! That's it there!" Jim swung the van sharp to the right and into the drive. A woman came out of the house towards them. "You're late." She greeted. "Yes, sorry about that, darling. We had a problem starting the van this morning." Jerry explained. "Well you better hurry up. We want everything in the new house before tonight." Said the tight-lipped woman. "As you pack her stuff, guess how much each item's worth." Jim told Jerry and John. It was half an hour before Jerry found the money earner. "Hey, Jim, take a look at this Bureau! It's got to be worth a few hundred quid!" "A few hundred quid? That's got to be worth a few thousand! Thomas Chippendale or one of his rivals probably made this! This is eighteenth century mahogany! Haven't you got any appreciation of furniture?" Jim was beside himself with glee and greed. "Well I do like my chair in the evenings after a hard days work�" But Jim interrupted Jerry. "Your share of this little masterpiece will buy you so many chairs, your backside will have a hard time deciding which one to sit on! It's Chippendale all right! Give me a hand getting it into the Van! And be carefull! Or I'll make sure you never sit down in the evenings again! They carefully lifted the Bureau and carried it out of the room and down the stairs. "This Bureau's heavy!" Jerry grunted. "Well it's mahogany, isn't it!" Jim replied. They managed to get the Writing Desk into the back of the van. Then they carried on with the job while daydreaming about what they would buy with their share of the money. "A Caribbean holiday!" Jerry said to John as they passed each other in the hall. They had finished by lunchtime and were sitting in the front of the van eating sandwiches when the woman came to see them. "You do know the address don't you?" "13 Lemon Road, Birmingham." John reassured. "Your furniture won't get there though." He added when she had driven away. They started driving and soon they were on the motorway heading for London. "We'll take it to be valued first then decide whether to sell it at Christie's or Sotheby's." Jim said as he overtook a car. But tragedy struck a few minutes later when they went round a junction. There was a crashing sound in the back of the van which sounded ominously like a grandfather clock falling on a Bureau. They pulled onto the curb and dashed round to the back. Jim flung open the door and looked horror struck at the mess. "Who forgot to strap that clock up?" Copyright: Jax Ferguson.

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