100 NOVELTY CONDOMS...
YOU'RE SURE TO FIND SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE
BY CARSON DOWELL
1) L'oreal Condoms- Because you're worth it.

2) Lays Flavored Edible Condoms- No one can eat just one.

3) Pringles Condoms- Once you pop you can't stop

4) Brandy's Condoms- Remember, Almost Doesn't Count

5) Britney Spears Condoms- Hit Me Baby one more time

6) IMac Condoms- They Come in Colors

7) Secret Female Condoms- Strong Enough for a man but PH balanced for a woman

8) Titanic Condoms- Sheer Size, strength and above all, stability

9) Edwin McCain Condoms- You could not ask for more

10) Tide Condoms- New and Improved

11) Ici Condoms- Put them where you want to be kissed

12) The Rocks Homosexual Condoms- Turn them sideways and shove them straight up your candy ass

13) Energizer Condoms- Keep going and going

14) Duracel Condoms- The copper top

15) Doritos Flavored Condoms- Inhale em

16) Maybelline Penis Enlarging Condoms- Maybe he's born with it- maybe it's maybelline.

17) Chyna's Female Condoms- Feast your eyes on the ninth wonder of the world

18) Friends Condoms- They'll be there for you when the "rain" starts to fall

19) Gateway Condoms- You can get a bargain basement condom, or get a gateway.

20) Michelob Condoms- Theres condoms, and then there's Michelob.

21) Iams pet condoms for your dogs- Good for life

22) Procter and Gamble Condoms- They make every day better in every way they can.

23) Lever 2000 full body condoms- For all your 2000 parts

24) New Kids on the Block Condoms- Are Hangin' Tough, and will never break

25) Mercury Condoms- Imagine Yourself in a mercury now.

26) Revlon Female Condoms- Make you feel like a woman

27) Lenox Condoms- Everyday Pleasure

28) Sarah Michaels- Enjoy the moment

29) Chevy Condoms- The More You Know, the better it looks

30) Liz Claiborne Condoms- Feel Comfortable

31) The Free Country Condom- Live in it

32) Stila Brand Female Condoms- Revolutionize your lips

33) Hennesy High I.Q. Condoms- Appropriately Complex

34) Nivea Condoms- Bring your skin to life

35) Lancome Improved Condoms- The New Age Solution

36) Chanel Double Ribbed Condoms- Share the Fantasy

37) Lycra Condoms- Enjoy the difference

38) Omega Condoms- The sign of excellence

39) Lucien Lelong Flavored condoms for Lesbians- For the other woman in you

40) Elige Condoms- Without a word you make your presence known

41) Scope Condoms- Meet a Handsome Stranger

42) Aunt Jemima Flavored Condoms- More mmm's per mouthful

43) Avitar Condoms-  The Condom of Possibilities

44) Nicole Condoms- Meet Boundless Imangination

45) Nokomis Condoms- Creative, Intuitive, Mystical and Magical

46) Emporio Armani Condoms- It's About Time

47)  Chanel Rainbow Condoms- A jolt of intense colour

48) Camel Condoms- What you're looking for

49) Jasmine Condoms- Sensuality begins with jasminetherapy condoms

50) Secs Appeal Brand Condoms- Irresistably attractive

51) Vidal Sassoon Condoms- Style that's perfectly you

52) Jordan Knight's Condoms- You know he wants to "Give it to You"

53) Sheryl Crow's Arrousal Enhancing Condoms- They will bring you "Anything But Down"

54) Prince Matchabelli's super thin condoms- Life without limits

55) Curve Condoms- See where they take you...

56) SilverTab Condoms for Large Penised Men-  Celebrate Your Specialness

57) Gossip Brand Penis enhancing Condoms for Orgys- Give them something to talk about

58) Elizabeth Arden's Quickie Condoms- Sometimes there's a moment when everything comes together... a moment of Splendor.

59) Clairol Hydrience Brand Impotence Ending Condoms- It's not impossible, it's Hydrience

60) Virginia Slims Brand Female Condoms- It's a Woman Thing

61) Mazda One Night Stand Condoms- A Change From your high maintanance relationships

62) Bulova Brand Condoms for longer orgasms- Of all the things you give time is the most valuable. 

63) Kool Brand Flavored condoms- No artificial flavors, always a smooth taste.

64) Psychic Condoms- They Know when you're coming.

65) Geicoc Direct Mail Order Condoms- A 15 minute call could save you 15% or more.

66) Stone Cold's Condoms- Like it or not, you will buy these condoms, and that's the bottom line, 'cause Stone Cold said so.

67) Timex Muliple Use Condoms- Takes a licking and keeps on ticking

68) The Eagles Hollywood Boulevard Prostitue Condoms- Welcome to the Hotel California

69) The Beatles Condoms for parents who have kids at sleepovers- I Think We're Alone Now

70) Nirvana's remember sex after you got drunk condoms- Tell me where did you sleep last night?

71) Hole's Condoms for Your Barbie and Ken- They are for "Doll Parts"

72) Ritz Brand Edible Condoms- Open a box, make up a snack

73) The Rock's condoms with explicit instructions for use- The Rock says, know your "roll".

74) Burger King's Pick a Pack flavored Condoms- When you have it your way, it just tastes better.

75) Aliz`e Condoms- Pour on the Passion

76) Neutrogena Female Condoms- Treat your lips beautifully

77) Disaronno Originale Condoms- Light a Fire

78) Speedo Condoms- There are no limits

79) Neiman Marcus Blow Job Softening Condoms- Because you really sink your teeth into things

80) Lancome Condoms 2000- The new age solution

81) Raymond Weil quickie condoms- Celebrate the moment

82) Baccarat Designer Condoms- Beauty has its reasons

83) Louis Boston Orignal Condoms-  There is something irresistible about a one of a kind item

84) Elizabeth Arden condoms for small penises- For all the laughter that lies ahead of me

85) Bonne Bell flavored condoms- Don't put it on unless it tastes good

86) Cover Girl female skin smoothening condoms- Lips just got smoother

87) Fancy Feast Feline Contraception- Good taste is easy to recognize

88) Phil Collins' Impotence relief condoms- Get it up Against All Odds

89) Michael Jackson's Condoms- Keep them around so you don't have to beat it

90) R. Kelly's adultery condoms- Keep it on the down low

91) En Vogue's Condoms that stay fresh- In case you think you are Never Gonna Get It

92) The Rock's One Size fits all Condom- It doesn't matter what size your dick is!

93) Smucker's Flavored Condoms- With a name like smuckers it has to be good

94) Tamotsu Thin Wear Condoms- In the spirit of understatement

95) Jif Condoms your mother gives you-  Choosy moms choose Jif

96) BeeGees Condoms Excellent for HIV prevention- Stayin' Alive

97) Snoop Condoms- Only for doggystyle

98) Dr. Dre's Condoms for married people-  Been there, done that

99) Silkies Condoms-  There's no excuse for not trying them

100) John Casablanca's Condoms for Virgins- Life is an adventure, we prepare you for the journey

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Note: Disclaimer, these are not real brands of condoms nor do the advertisers of the real products make any claims that they are. Also none of the singers/actors endorse or provide condoms about them.
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