The side of Spirituality that involves higher reason, restrain, discipline, etc., all have to come out of a place of passion. You have to HAVE a passion before you can evolve it into something higher. Kundalini energy begins in the lower centers of survival fear and sexuality, and works up through the highest charkas. There has to be an exploration of the more basic feelings in order to create a context for higher experience.
We have, in our culture, attempted to disown our own being, leapfrog it, and directly reach higher states. It is like skipping kindergarten and going directly to high school. We need those experiences to create a context of ourselves that can reach to higher levels. A great deal of Spiritual work that is devotional in nature contains an element of sexuality. You might identify with the God or Goddess and engage in sexual/spiritual union.
To allow yourself the full flavor and texture of sexual fantasy, and to develop and nurture it, is to allow yourself to begin to be creative. As you follow your sexual passion, it becomes more emotionally fulfilling, more intense and leads you to higher creativity. The passion of the two to become one is the catalytic element that allows two beings to experience unified consciousness. In the realm of the imagination, you can take this even farther, experience the complete merging of yourself with another being.
The intense bliss and pleasure that comes out of that experience is difficult to describe. You can imagine being intimate with a person in such a way that your consciousness actually merges with theirs to a certain extent, and part of you and part of them merge to become one single being. This being is an improvement on your being and theirs, taking all that you both are and creating something higher and better. Rather than doubling your weaknesses, it compounds your strengths.
This is an example of high-intimacy, which can come out of the imagination. We can take the ideas of our sexual passion, fulfill them, and then develop them in unexpected and new directions. I have had creative projects that went sour because I listened to other people and didn’t follow my own passions, and always regretted it. That doesn’t mean you don’t accept advice, rather you make it a rule to follow your inner passion, and to not be so overly attached that you can’t drop those things about which you are no longer passionate.
When we feel sexual passion, it draws us out of the depression and staleness that can develop in life, from our enslavement to work and responsibility to make money, and into a world where our entire being is alive and awake. In this sense, sexuality is the counterpoint to artificiality; it comes directly from us unfiltered. Spiritual work has always cautioned practitioners to not carelessly waste their sexual energy on mere indulgences. But, you have to actually explore and familiarize yourself with your own inner sexual landscape before you venture farther.
When our curiosity naturally takes us farther, and has been somewhat satisfied in the realm of the sexual, this is natural process at work. Many people in this day and age are sexually oppressed in new ways that prevent them from even tapping into their own passion, much less developing it as a means to get to higher realms. While historically our parents and grandparents may have lived in a culture that suppressed and denied the sexual, we now live in an age that openly panders to it.
This comes from false sexuality, which is marketing that has killed and “skinned” sexuality of its most blatant imagery, and misused it. When sexual imagery is enslaved to marketing and to culture gone wrong, people are taught to hate their bodies, hate themselves, and live in shame unless they have a “perfect” figure. They objectify their own being, cutting themselves off from their deepest sexual feelings and are reduced to “pieces of meat.” Simultaneously, they are taught to disown their sexual imagination by being sold a very limited palette of sexual choices, and being told that to live outside of these choices is impossible.
People can easily be taught to open their legs, but opening their hearts would a tougher sell. Marketing steers clear of such treacherous waters, reducing sex to a mechanical, “heartless” act. The best bet in our culture, we are being told, it to not have a heart. The ability of sexual passion to allow us to feel and open ourselves to others is more interesting than the physical act itself, in so many ways. But the heartfelt aspect of sex is also the most intimidating. To have the ability to be hurt, to not be “in control,” and to risk the possibility of falling in love and losing the traditional boundaries of self are frightening.
If we disown our imaginative sexual experience and live in a world of flesh-only, we can only express our sexuality through the act itself, with others. We share premature intimacy with people we don’t know, ignoring our own discomfort as we attempt to seduce them into allowing us to “use” them sexually. We don’t know this person and don’t want to. It is too painful to feel in this situation, so we objectify our bodies, close down to our own feelings, and operate mechanically. We also have to become more cold and brutal with others, quickly slamming the door on the possibility of further intimacy.
The monster we have to become to “get what we need” is not worth the price. If we allow ourselves to enjoy a full, rich, sexual landscape, then we don’t need a physical partner. There is a great deal of cultural shame associated with not having a lover. To not have a lover is to be a “loser” and to have “failed.” People feel shame and fear around the idea of not being sexually attractive to others; they look at themselves naked in the mirror and evaluate their sexual “worth” based on what they see. Most people have been sold the idea of their having a certain body, and are disappointed. If they are sufficiently filled with shame and fear, they will go to the gym and work out constantly until they get that body.
Some fail and some succeed, but all are motivated by fear. People who choose not to pursue physical perfection are rejected violently by others, as they mirror what they are being told. People buy that lie and do not allow themselves to feel sexual because they do not look like a model. The majority of people who are in this system are victimized by it, and yet actively seek to keep it alive. Even the rampant spread of disease does not slow people down. The fear of having no sexual outlet is more powerful than the fear of death in some cases. Without imagination, there is only the physical acting out of our desire, and all the pain that entails.
We, as a culture, are losing our ability to establish sexual/emotional intimacy. And yet it is exactly that ability to finally surrender that is so important in our devotional work. We can pray, and generate the consciousness-energy of the deity in our life, but we can’t use it until we bring ourselves into alignment with the ideas that are what the deity is. We have to be the deity, see through their eyes and open to their values. We can’t get there without a catalyzing agent that brings the two into one and makes gold, through the alchemical process. This is an essential aspect of Spirituality. Without the ability to be emotionally intimate, we are shut off from an aspect of our Spirituality. Sexuality is part of that intimacy key. Let’s discuss an exercise to create a plane of existence where we can fully explore our sexuality.
Exercise #25: Spiritual-Sexual Plane of Existence
What is your biggest sexual turn-on? Think about that idea, that fetish, and then imagine a plane of existence that is both sexual and Spiritual in nature, that is themed around your particular taste. The sexual aspect must be given a structure, and that structure flows naturally from your fetish. If you have multiple fetishes, just focus on one. Now, take your idea of the Spiritual, of the Creative Force, and bring it into the picture as an element, perhaps as a Spiritual Sun, shining down on this plane of existence, and sharing of its energies. Or, the very earth, trees, clouds, etc., could be made of a Spiritual substance that glows with this energy.
Here in this idealized world, the sexual aspect of your life can be fulfilled totally, without the pain and emotional discomfort of real life entanglements. Sexual features of body can be exaggerated, and sensation can be amplified. Emotional connectivity can exceed human limits, and you can even explore the consciousness of your partner. The only limitation should be that sexual interaction should be consensual between adults. If it isn’t, then that idea is not going to be compatible with a Spiritual environment.
Now, allow yourself to be a being here, native to the plane of existence, and part of what is going on. Get a feel for what the mode of interaction is between beings that are native to this place and how this plane feels. The sexual energy should not feel compressed or held back, but strengthened and exaggerated. The emotions around the sexual feeling should be extremely heightened. It will probably feel strange to allow yourself to take sexual fantasy this far, but by allowing yourself to explore the limits or your imagination, you are allowing yourself a wider palette to paint of off, and a wider variety of experiences to explore. Explore this plane and state of being over time. Interact with others, get familiar with the landscape, and even have a place of residence here. Allow yourself to experience the breadth and depth of feeling that is possible here. Engage in sexual activity here freely and don’t hold back. Develop this aspect of your relationship with yourself.
Never accept sexuality that only belongs to and serves others, because that is power being abused. Sexuality belongs to you, and is yours to use as you choose. Remove yourself from situations where sexuality leads to humiliation or loss of control. The power of your own mind to be creatively sexual can be the most fulfilling aspect of your life.
For the vast majority of people who don’t look like models, we can either crawl into a dark corner and cry, or we can own our own minds and bring forth Spiritual/Sexual passion and use it fully, trusting it to take us where it will. We can transcend the limitation of the physical in our minds and experience the “impossible.” To find the hidden locations where our sexual passion is hiding, and to bring it forth, and make those places our homes, is to free our sexual experience on earth. Goodbye until next time, and always play responsibly!!!
