selfless love

This morning I was doodling along in the classroom until the song entitled "Only Selfless Love" by Jaime Rivera was played in the speakers. It was one of my favorite song at this moment. Its a song for The World Meeting of Families this January.

I paused. A tear rolled down to my cheek.

Selfless love? Does all of the people have selfless love in their hearts? This question has been running in my mind when I heard the song... I pity myself.

I feel so bad. I feel so sad. I try not to show to others how much pain I'm suffering right now. Yesterday, when I got home from school mom opened the door for me and then when she sat on the sofa she began bawling. She was crying that later on I cried too. She feel depressed about everything. My father, our lives, our home-- everything. Everything's gone. I have nothing to be proud of telling that I have a family. My family is broken. I am starting to grow up from a broken family.

And this morning, when I heard the song; I can't let my other classmates see the tears from my eyes. I cant tell anybody from what I am through now. I can't even utter the words that my family is broken at this very moment. I feel so alone. No one could see the deeper feelings inside of me.

I am wishing that these things never happened in my life. I hope that everyone has a selfless love like HIM. He never thought of himself. He selflessly gave His life to all of us just to pay for whatever sins we made. And yet, how come we never had selfless love in our hearts? We only think of ourselves. We never thought of giving our life to our families and loving them all through our life. We never listen to our family's needs and the affection that they give us. We never loved them at all.

And I was thinking, is that the reason why my family's broken? Because of selfish love?

I wonder. 

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©November 2003 by Vanya Robiso

respect, do not steal.