Title: Revenge is sweet Author: Alison (aka Alleyb) Disclaimer: All the characters come from David E Kelley’s Productions "Ally McBeal" and "The Practice" It was a hectic morning at the office, being only one week until Christmas. All the lawyers were rushing to get as much done as possible before the holidays. "These Christmas parties are becoming a little too regular for my liking," Ellenor said to no one in particular. "Since when does this firm have any traditions?" "Oh come on Ellenor," Lucy replied tartly. "It’s the only fun you guys have all year. The least you could do is put on a party hat and pretend to be happy about your job." "Lucy, shut up!" Rebecca snapped, searching her desk furiously. "Has anybody seen the case file for my drive-by shooter?" "I have, but you told me to shut up," Lucy sulked. Exasperated Rebecca turned to Lucy, "Well just point to it then!" Lucy went to her desk and retrieved the file for Rebecca. She handed it to her silently, noticing as she did there was a man standing in the doorway. He hesitated, not knowing who to approach. In the background, completely oblivious, Ellenor was inquiring as to Rebecca’s bad mood and Bobby was yelling at somebody on the phone. Lucy smiled at the visitor, "Hi, can I help you?" "Oh, you look so busy." He turned to leave, but Lucy, not wanting to let a prospective client go replied, "We’re always busy at this time of the year, do you need a lawyer?" "Yeah," he mumbled, looking around the still bustling office. "Can I put this somewhere?" He handed Lucy a gun with a blood-covered hand. She shrieked and stepped back into Bobby who was still on the phone. He frowned at her, "Lucy can we have some quiet here please?" "Bobby, it’s a gun!" The office was suddenly quiet and turned to look at the stranger, who under their glare fainted to the floor. They all rushed to him. "Is he dead?" Lucy wailed. "Shut up Lucy," Ellenor replied. Bobby turned to Eugene, "He’s not our client, we should call the police." "But he came to hire us. In his mind we might be his lawyers. We can’t call the police until he wakes up." "This is stupid!" interrupted Ellenor. "He may have killed someone." "Lindsay, call Helen, then call the police." Lucy looked up, realizing what they had been saying, "He told me he needed a lawyer." "So should I call the police or not?" "Yes," said Bobby. "No," contradicted Eugene. Lindsay sighed. They all turned to look at the man lying on the floor, who at that moment had begun to wake up. He let out a loud groan and everybody stepped back, making sure the gun was out of range of his hand. He squinted up at the lawyers, "Who are you?" Bobby stepped forward, "We’re lawyers from Donnel, Young, Dole and Frutt. Can you tell us why you came here?" "I need a lawyer," he groaned sitting up. The others took another step back, realizing now that that the gun was in his range. Lucy kicked it away. "Oops." They all glared at her. "Why do you need a lawyer?" Looking around at his attentive audience, he came to life. "Well my neighbor killed my dog with that gun, I want to sue him for all he’s got." Everybody sighed with relief and went back to work. Bobby turned to Jimmy. "Jimmy will take this one." Curious, Lucy approached the man, "Is that blood on your hands dog blood?" "Lucy!" "Of course," the man replied. "What did you think it was?" "Oh, nothing!" She said hurriedly, ushering him into the conference room. The office returned to its usual calm and night soon approached. Everybody was wishing that they were somewhere else, except for Lucy who was looking forward to the party. Rebecca wandered in, tired from her court case. She immediately regretted it and was about to turn and leave when Lucy spotted her. "Rebecca! Good, you’re here!" "Mmm Hmm." "I thought you might go straight home after the case." "I wish I had." She sat down. Lindsay got up from her desk and went into Bobby’s office, the others watched, wondering if they should get the glass to listen to their conversation. Ellenor made the move to get up, but Eugene came out of his office. She sat down again. "Ready?" Lindsay asked. "Almost," he replied distractedly, rustling through papers. She walked behind him and put her arms around him. "Ready now?" She teased. Helen appeared in the doorway. "So are you guys going to spend the whole time in here like you did last year?" She was hoping that Lindsay wouldn’t leave her alone with any of the psychos that the firm represented. "Don’t worry Helen, we’ll be with you the whole time." "The whole time? The last time I was with the two of you, you discussed what I was like in bed all night." Lindsay patted his arm, while Helen laughed, "That was a great night wasn’t it?" Helen paused and smiled again, "By the way Lindsay, have you noticed what we discussed last time?" "Oh you mean the way he-" She stops as she sees Ellenor walk past the still open office door. Helen and Lindsay burst into laughter. "Oh please! Not again!" Bobby groans. Ellenor hesitates, but decides she may as well go in. When Lindsay and Helen laugh like that, it’s usually about Bobby. She has always wondered whether Bobby resents Helen for being around so much. "Bobby, can I talk to you for a minute?" "Sure," he says with relief. Lindsay and Helen walk out to where there’s a crowd gathering around the punch bowl. Helen whispered to Lindsay, "Why don’t we get out of here?" "We can’t Helen. I have to talk to the clients." "Can’t Lucy do that?" "She’d probably scare them away" "Hey!" Lucy said from across the room. "I heard that!" At about ten when the party was slowing down, Bobby and Lindsay sneaked out. Helen watched and decided to follow them, some old balding guy had been talking to her for the past two hours about how he missed his dog and she saw no other way to escape. She interrupted him mid sentence, "Sorry, I have to go now." He watched her leave and turned to Rebecca, "Do you know anything about dogs?" Rebecca sighed and decided she needed a pay rise for this. She decided she’d also talk to Lucy about the future of Christmas Parties in the firm. Bobby and Lindsay were walking arm in arm down the road. Helen caught up to them and took Bobby’s other arm. "Hey! Get your own guy!" "No. We had a deal that you wouldn’t leave me alone in there." "But you looked so happy." "That was a fixed grimace, not a smile." She looked around and saw a bar to her right. "Why don’t we go in here? I’ve heard about this place." They wandered inside to find that there was only one spare table, they sat down and ordered drinks. At the next table, Helen recognized one of the other Assistant DA’s, Renee. She turned around to say hi, only to see who was sitting next to her. "Oh. Its you." Ally turned around and when she saw Bobby, she almost fell off her chair in surprise. "Bobby! Umm, uhhh, hi!" Renee gave Bobby a flirtatious smile. "Hi, I’ve heard a lot about you." Bobby shifted uncomfortably, glancing at Lindsay and Helen. They both looked at him, waiting for his response. "Ally, its uh good to see you again." "You too. Hmmm (smiling) I was just thinking about you." Lindsay, unable to stand it any longer, jumped in. "So have you seen any unicorns lately?" Ally fixed a smile on her face and turned to Bobby, who had turned to give Lindsay a dirty look, not liking it when she acted jealous. Renee and Helen meanwhile were enjoying the exchange. "So, Bobby. We should go out to dinner some time, you know, catch up?" "Oh, so you’ve run out of men to date? I heard that you went on a dating spree recently." Lindsay spoke up before Bobby could respond. "Well at least I have the inclination to date. I’m not too busy representing drug dealers." Ally responded. There was silence at both tables. Lindsay was waiting for Bobby to refuse Ally’s offer, Bobby was hoping that Lindsay would just say something about their relationship. Helen wasn’t going to end this conversation if she could help it; it was too much fun. Ally began humming and everyone turned to her in surprise. She looked up to see everyone staring at her and almost fell off her chair again. "Oh! Sorry. So who wants to dance?" She smiled looking at Bobby. "Go on Bobby, go and dance with Ally." She stood up and as Ally walked past her, she put out her foot and watched her sprawl out over the dance floor. "Hey!" Ally got up and picked up her drink, dumping it in Lindsay’s lap. Renee and Helen laughed, thoroughly enjoying the night. Bobby decided that they had better leave before the two women killed each other. He looked at Ally and hurriedly said goodbye, pulling Lindsay out of the bar. Helen watched them leave and said to Ally, "so I guess you didn’t hear that they’re engaged?" "Engaged!?" "Yeah, I know you like married men, but I’d stay away from him." "I had no idea." She looked at Renee, "Why didn’t you tell me?" Helen smiled and left, leaving a sulking Ally and a smiling Renee.