Title: LOSING STREAK - Miracle on Lindsay's Street
Author: Ally
 

Authors notes: This one is for Jewel who never stopped begging for a 
miracle cure for Lindsay. It was written for her birthday originally, 
and she calls it her alternative universe. Hope you all enjoy it too!

Summary: Its probably a good idea to wade your way through Losing 
Streak before you read this. But if you haven't read it, a quick 
summary is that Lindsay has cancer and is undergoing treatment. The 
firm is going up against Tommy Silva in a law suit against the firm. 
Lindsay has just had more tests and the doctor is here to share the 
results...

Disclaimer: The usual! Not mine, they belong to DEK and ABC and lots 
of other people. I make no profit.

********************************************************************

"I have bad news," the doctor announced.

 Bobby gripped Lindsay's hand tighter and felt the blood drain from 
his face. All optimism flew out the window. Lindsay felt the muscles 
in her legs go flaccid and thanked god she wasn't standing. "What is 
it?" she whispered.

"We got the results back from the tests we did yesterday."

"And?" Bobby asked impatiently.

"And…the chemotherapy has so far been unsuccessful.

"What are you saying?" Lindsay asked evenly.

"Lindsay…there is no other way to say this…the cancer has 
metastasised in your spine. It isn't a good sign."

 Lindsay digested the news numbly. She had dreaded those words since 
the moment she had been diagnosed with cancer. Ugly word…metastasis. 
She had been warned that it was a possible consequence but had never 
really believed it would happen to her. But then she had never 
thought that she'd get cancer either, so someone above was obviously 
enjoying destroying all her beliefs. She looked at Bobby, he was 
silent, contemplating: a thousand thoughts crossing his mind. The 
churning in her stomach was not fear for herself, but more fear for 
him. Without thinking, words popped out of her mouth.

"How long?"

Bobby turned to her in horror, the implication of her words piercing 
through his muddled thoughts. How could she be so calm? So 
calculating? He saw the doctor's mouth open to reply, but heard no 
words. Without further thought he moved towards the door, his legs 
feeling detached from his body…a mind of their own.

"I have…I…I need some air," he announced; the words forming of their 
own accord. He had lost complete control of all his actions.

Lindsay watched him go, wishing she could jump out of bed and enclose 
him in her embrace, never to let go. The doctor also watched him go, 
feeling awkward. Lindsay turned back to him, tears shining in her 
eyes, "Two years?"

He nodded.

"What if…what if I don't want treatment?"

Dr. Morrison watched her face intently for a second before 
answering, "Maybe 6 months. Maybe less."

***

 Bobby blindly walked out of the hospital and found himself in a 
garden. He sat on a bench and covered his face with his hands. He had 
been so sure, so certain that Lindsay would be okay. How could God be 
so cruel to put him through this twice? Did he have some agenda 
against him? He went to church regularly, went to confession, lived a 
reasonably moral life. He fought for people that other people 
persecuted, people nobody would help. Sure he had often used morally 
questionable tactics, but he had often returned freedom to innocent 
people. Why was he being punished?

A hand fell on his shoulder and he looked up to meet Lindsay's 
concerned eyes. Wordlessly he stood and wrapped his arms around her. 
Her body moulded into his naturally, as it had done countless times 
before. Holding her seemed so right. So natural. If only he could 
hold onto her forever. Protect her forever. She looked so thin, 
fragile. As though the cancer was not only destroying her organs but 
also her spirit. He held her as though he would never hold her again. 
He could feel Lindsay's tears wetting his chest, through his shirt 
and fought the urge to shed his own. She needed him to be strong for 
her. His moment of weakness was over. He had to be strong now. It was 
just like when his mother had died and people had patted him on the 
back and in a comforting tone told him, "You have to be brave" 
and "take it like a man". Yes, he had to be strong now. Strong for 
Lindsay. Her sobs eventually abated, but her head remained 
obstinately buried into his chest. Finally he heard her voice, 
muffled by his Armani shirt. "This is so unfair."

Bobby silently agreed. The words however pierced into his emotional 
vault. His mother had always had a response for him when he had 
uttered similar words. "Life's not fair," she'd say. Somehow he 
didn't think Lindsay would appreciate the same sentiment now.

"I know," he whispered instead.

"We need to talk," she told him. The sun disappeared behind a cloud, 
leaving the garden in shadow. Clothed only in thin pyjamas, Lindsay 
shivered. Bobby took of his jacket and wrapped it around her 
shoulders. Sitting on the bench he pulled her down into his lap, 
enclosing her in his embrace to keep her warm. Lindsay relaxed into 
him and they sat for a few moments, enjoying the peace. Bobby sat 
watching a bee sample a selection of flowers, not really seeing it 
but following its movement unconsciously.

"We need to talk," Lindsay repeated finally.

He nodded.

She took a deep breath. "He says that if I continue treatment, I 
probably have about 2 years."

Bobby leaned forward so that his cheek was resting on her shoulder. 
Two years wasn't nearly enough. Was he being selfish for wanting her 
for longer than that? But his thoughts suddenly jumped elsewhere as 
the implication of her words hit him. "If?"

She nodded.

"But..." he stopped. He wasn't sure what he wanted to say. Of course 
he wanted her to continue. She had to give it a chance, take every 
opportunity. He had to make her see that.

Lindsay felt the tears begin to fall again. This wasn't right. She 
wasn't ready. Two years wasn't nearly enough time to experience all 
that life had to offer. There were so many things she wanted to do. 
And how could she leave Bobby? How could she even consider not 
fighting this illness for a few more moments with him? Precious 
moments like lying in bed on Sunday morning, reading the newspaper, 
breakfast remains scattered over the bed, music playing softly in the 
background. How could she not fight for those times? But then there 
was the alternative; an alternative that scared her more than 
anything. "Bobby...I hate this...the treatment...I hate it. I don't 
want to go through hell for a few more months of life. And it's not a 
quality life...I hate the thought of lying doped up in a bed...we 
have to think about...it might be easier...." She couldn't do this. 
How could she prioritize ending everything over spending time with 
Bobby?

As though reading her mind, he replied in a hurt whisper, "You can't 
even do it for me?"

 Bobby watched his words affect her. With voice cracking, fighting 
the tears that were desperate to fall, she replied, "I want to...I 
really want to. But I'm afraid I won't be able..." she succumbed to 
the tears and the sentence was cut off.

"Of course you can," he replied. Holding her tightly. "Of course you 
can. I'm here for you. I will always be here for you. You won't be 
going through this alone, Linds." He listened to her cry and began 
again, this time in a much softer voice as though afraid the world 
would hear his confession. "When my Mom was dying...she fought so 
hard. She fought every step of the way...nothing would deter her from 
her goal of getting better. But one day the doctor came to us and he 
told us that there was nothing else they could do. That was what 
killed her. She suddenly lost all hope." Tears began to make a slow 
journey down his face and Lindsay reached up to wipe them away. He 
never talked much about his mother but he knew that the memory of her 
was always in the back of his mind. This must be hell for him, she 
thought. But his next words cleared her mind of all thought. "You 
still have a chance Lindsay. There are treatments they can try. You 
can still fight this. We have to try."

"I know," Lindsay whispered.

Her words were so soft that Bobby almost missed them.

Without daring to hope he asked, "You do?" 

She nodded, "I want to continue treatment."

 ***

 Bobby walked into the office later that day to be greeted with 
Lucy's frustrated glare, "Where have you been?" she demanded. "You're 
cell phone was off, you weren't answering at home. They couldn't find 
you at the hospital. We've been going crazy here trying to find you!"

"Is that Bobby?" Ellenor asked breathlessly, appearing from the 
conference room.

"Yeah the prodigal son has returned," Lucy replied sarcastically.

Nothing was able to take away from the hope, the optimism Bobby was 
now feeling. Not even Lucy in a ghastly mood. He had watched as 
Lindsay had received her dose of chemotherapy, certain now that 
everything would be okay.

"What's up?"

"Silva came by."

"Silva? What did he want?"

"You'll never guess."

"I don't doubt that," Bobby replied. His mind was so intently focused 
on Lindsay, it would be a challenge to think coherently of anything 
else.

"The police found new evidence."

"What?"

"Evidence that proves beyond any doubt that Barbara Keireth killed 
Hillary Williams."

"WHAT!?"

"A neighbor was apparently filming his son's birthday party and it's 
on the tape. Shows Barbara lifting the shovel. She did it."

"Oh my god."

"They've dropped the suit."

"Oh my god."

Rebecca walked in the door, relief washed over her as she saw 
Bobby. "Have you heard!?"

Bobby nodded numbly.

"Isn't it amazing?"

He nodded again.

"Can you do anything but nod?" Lucy grinned impishly.

He shook his head and the women laughed. Rebecca enveloped him in a 
hug.

"How's Lindsay?" she asked.

He was silent.

She pulled out of the hug and asked with trepidation, "Bobby?"

"Uh...she...we had some bad news."

The cheer in the room was instantly replaced with worry.

"What's wrong? What happened?" Rebecca asked.

"The cancer has spread."

"Oh God," Ellenor whispered. Every other thought flew from her mind. 
This couldn't be happening.

 ***

 Autumn's dazzling colors shone brightly in the deep blue sky as 
Lindsay leaned over the toilet bowl, energetically expelling the 
contents of her lunch. It was at times like these that she questioned 
her decision to continue with treatment. But a month had passed since 
that day and every moment since had been stored in her mind, 
treasured like a precious gift from a close friend. Even on days like 
this when her body seemed determined to keep her miserable, she 
remained grateful for all that she had. She grimaced as another wave 
of nausea flowed through her body, beginning in her abdomen, 
compressing her chest and numbing her mind. She leaned once more 
towards the toilet bowl and when the nausea abated, rested her head 
gratefully against the cool ceramic base. The chill felt good against 
her skin.

"Lindsay?"

She lifted her head at the sound of his voice. Bobby. Her knight in 
shining Armani. She waited for him to find her, knowing that he'd 
check the bathroom first.

"Linds?" Bobby pushed the door open and saw his wife sitting on the 
floor. He took in her gaunt face and strands of hair stuck to her 
forehead with sweat. "I should have come home sooner." He apologized, 
wetting a towel and sitting next to her.

She lifted her head enough to shake it slightly, "There's nothing you 
can do."

"I want to be here for you."

Warmth flooded through her body and the nausea forgotten as he spoke 
so earnestly. She leaned forward and kissed him tenderly, "Thank you."

He gently wiped her face with the towel and his voice became slightly 
hoarse. "My dad never left my mothers side, the whole time she was 
sick." He shook his head. "Not that it did much good."

Lindsay felt her heart break. "Bobby, she may not have recovered, but 
I'm sure his presence made her feel so much...happier...and loved."

He nodded. "I think he gave her hope."

She smiled softly, reaching out for his hand. "And I bet you did too."

He played with her wedding band, "Yeah."

With wobbly legs she stood up, challenging the nausea to return. 
Bobby reached forward and helped her back to their bedroom, where she 
unwrapped her bathrobe and crawled gratefully into bed.

"You give me hope," she told him finally. "I couldn't survive through 
any of this without you."

"Yeah right. The stubborn Lindsay Dole give up on something?" he 
teased.

She swatted him, "Watch it. I'm sick remember."

"Oh how convenient," he pulled blankets up over her shivering 
body. "Have you been like this all day?"

"Lunch didn't agree with me."

"How argumentative"

She smiled in response.

"Well...get some sleep. I'll make dinner."

Her face turned green at the thought.

"Or not," he added hastily, pushing himself off the bed to leave her 
to rest.

"Bobby...stay," she said. He didn't need to be asked twice and was 
soon cradling her in is arms, her head nestled comfortably on his 
shoulder. With a deep, satisfied breath she relaxed against his body. 
For the first time that day she felt almost normal. Finding the hem 
of his shirt she ran her hand up beneath it, feeling his abdominal 
muscles contract under her touch. She smiled. She might look like 
hell but her influence on him hadn't changed at all. It was 
encouraging.

"Bobby?" she asked, fearing that he was close to sleep.

"Hmmm?"

Okay not so encouraging. She ran her hand southwards, hoping that at 
least a part of him might wake up. "Bobby?"

With a sudden movement Bobby grabbed her hand and rolled over so she 
was held prisoner beneath his body. "Yes?"

She grinned, "Nothing."

"I thought you were feeling sick."

She considered, "Well I'm a little better now."

They kissed hungrily, seizing the rare opportunity to make love. 
Celibacy had become one of the more disappointing side effects of the 
cancer. 

As suddenly as they started, they stopped. Bobby had pulled away and 
was searching her face, "Are you sure."

She answered with another enticing kiss, at the same time beginning 
to unbutton his shirt.

Bobby pulled back, "If I hurt you..."

She nodded, "I'll scream."

"You always scream," he smirked, running a hand up her thigh.

"Well I'll yell `oh god'" she suggested, furrowing her brow with mock 
seriousness.

His hand stopped, "No you do that a lot too."

She laughed and kissed him again. "Prove it."

Being a good lawyer, he was always able to back up his statements 
with fact and he most satisfactorily made his case.

 ***

 The brilliant golden hues of autumn slowly muted into faded greys 
and the icy fingers of winter began to caress exposed skin at every 
opportunity. Lindsay lay on the sofa, an episode of Passions playing 
soundlessly on the background as she listened to the rain. Her hair 
(which had miraculously remained rooted into her scalp) was fanned 
out on the cushion behind her and her hands played with the tassels 
on the blanket covering her body. Four months had passed. Her days 
had been one of two kinds, good or bad. Either she woke up feeling 
mostly bright and happy. The discomfort that she had grown to accept, 
constantly lingered in the background, but her attitude towards life 
was good. The bad days began with pain and ended usually with 
exhaustion. Today was a good day. She had kissed Bobby goodbye with 
TV remote control in hand, resigned to another day of daytime soaps. 
Truth be told, she was beginning to quite like Guiding Light, but 
Passions she could do without. She has spent the past three weeks at 
home and the boredom was killing her. Bobby had insisted she stay at 
home and rest, and she had complied without argument. The smallest 
exertions tended to exhaust her and work was beginning to take its 
toll. But she needed to do something.

With a sigh she dragged herself off the sofa and into the shower, 
sighing with contentment as hot water cascaded over her shoulders.  
She opened the closet thoughtfully after showering and eyed the 
contents with speculation and finally reached for one of her favorite 
outfits. It felt good to be able to dress in real clothes again, 
rather than the pyjamas that had made up the bulk of her wardrobe for 
the past few months. She pulled nylons over freshly shaven legs and 
dressed in a crisp white blouse and blue skirt and jacket. She 
admired her reflection in the mirror, feeling normal for the first 
time in months.

Within minutes she was reversing her underused car from her parking 
space and driving it carefully through city traffic to the office. 
Her arrival was greeted with stunned silence until Lucy 
shrieked, "Lindsay!" and pandemonium broke out. Bobby emerged from 
his office and silently watched everybody greet her ecstatically with 
hugs. His feelings changed with every passing second. He had first 
reacted with shock at her appearance. When he had left, she had been 
sitting on the sofa in her PJs watching the morning news, to see her 
now looking almost normal in work clothes gave him a hope he hadn't 
dared believe in the past months. His next feeling was concern. Was 
she okay to come to work? Would the stress be too much for her? And 
it was winter...the flu could easily land her in hospital. Yes, it 
was much safer for her to stay at home and rest. When the group 
finally dispersed, Lindsay collapsed exhausted into her chair. Five 
minutes in the office and her resolve to come back to work part time 
had all but vanished. Her abdomen throbbed steadily and her muscles 
felt completely drained of energy. She sneaked a look through the 
blinds to see Bobby hunched over his desk. He had barely greeted her 
before disappearing back into his office. She heaved herself from her 
seat and walked under the watchful eye of all her coworkers into his 
office, closing the door gently behind her.

"Hey," she tried unsuccessfully to hide the tiredness in her voice.

"Hey," he replied.

"Big case?" she sat down with a slight thump.

He rubbed his temples, "Yeah. We got it today."

"Need some help?" she asked pointedly, hoping that he would explain 
his reaction to her returning to work.

He looked at her seriously for a second before shaking his 
head, "Eugene's second chairing."

"Well I could help with res-"

"Linds why did you come back?" he interrupted.

"Bobby-"

"No I really want to know. You spend most days unable to get out bed, 
the smallest things tire you...why...why do you want to put yourself 
through this?"

"I need to keep busy." 

"But work-"

"Bobby I don't want to come in every day, I don't even want to come 
in for full days, but being at home is driving me insane. I have 
absolutely nothing to do...I need to do this."

"The doctors said-"

She sighed, "I know."

Bobby sat thoughtfully. His first instinct was to drive her home and 
lock her in their bedroom for compulsory rest, but it contradicted 
everything he loved and admired about her. She was a strong, 
independent woman and he should be happy that she felt good enough to 
want to come to work. With a sigh he raised his head and met her 
gaze. He saw the stubborn glint in her eye and knew that the 
situation could easily develop into a full blown argument, which 
would not be conducive to the low stress levels he desired.

"Okay."

She raised her eyebrows, "Okay? I'm not asking for your permission 
Bobby."

He sighed again, she was ready to fight and it seemed that nothing he 
said would deter her. "I'm not trying to control your life...god 
knows I can't do that."

Lindsay immediately regretted her words, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to 
sound so defensive. Is there a case that needs dusting off?"

"I know one that needs some of your constitutional genius," Bobby 
told her sincerely. He walked to his filing cabinet and opened the 
top drawer. The file was covered with dust, which he wiped off 
hastily.

Lindsay looked at him sceptically, "How long has that been in there?"

He grimaced, "Too long." He handed her the file and she opened it 
curiously. The first thing she saw was a picture of a young girl 
smiling broadly at the camera. Bobby watched her expression change 
from casual interest to intense focus as she began to read. He could 
almost see the lawyer side of her brain switched on as she began 
sorting through the information.

" I'll take you home at lunchtime if you're tired," he told her as 
she began to walk out.

"Okay," she replied, not really hearing what he had said. Through the 
blinds he watched her sit at her desk and chew the end of her pen 
thoughtfully. He realised whether he liked it or not, she was where 
she was meant to be.

***

Lindsay lifted the knocker and rapped lightly on the door. She could 
hear voices from within and finally footsteps approaching and the 
door opened slightly to reveal a tired face, "I don't want to buy 
anything," it told her.

"Hi Mrs Reynolds? My name is Lindsay Dole, we spoke on the phone 
yesterday."

"Oh. The lawyer?"

"Yes. Its about Ashleigh."

The door closed as the chain was removed and opened widely to reveal 
a dimly lit front room with brown curtains and damp walls patterned 
with mould. Lindsay screwed up her nose slightly and followed the 
woman into another similar room containing a couple of odd armchairs 
and toys strewn about on the floor.

"Have a seat," the woman indicated to the cleaner of the armchairs 
and Lindsay perched on it uneasily. A dog belted in from another room 
and jumped ecstatically onto Lindsay's lap. She couldn't help but 
giggle as the squirming bundle of fur planted kisses on her chin.

"Max! Down!" the woman commanded, to little effect.

Lindsay tried pushing him off gently but when this had no effect, she 
unceremoniously dumped him on the floor and turned back to the 
woman. "Mrs. Reynolds, where is Ashleigh now?"

Her grim face broke into a broad smile, "Its Laura...none of this Mrs 
Reynolds stuff for me. It makes me feel old."

Lindsay smiled back.

Laura returned to the question, "She's playing with her best friend, 
Sarah. Sarah's mom picked them up from school."

"How long have you been looking after her?"

"We've been fostering children for over ten years now, and Ashleigh 
has been with us for three years."

"You wish to adopt her?"

"You don't understand Ms. Dole, my husband and I have been wanting to 
adopt a child for years but we're considered to be too old. We tried 
for years to have children of our own but by they time the doctors 
informed us that we wouldn't be able to...we were already approaching 
the maximum age. So we turned to fostering children, which has been 
very rewarding, but not permanent. When we met Ashleigh she was just 
two and we feel like she's our daughter. About six months ago they 
began thinking it would be beneficial to return her to her 
mother...her mother is a heroin addict! How do they expect her to be 
able to support her...financially and emotionally?!" She began to sob 
into her hands. "We don't have much, but we have love to give and 
we'd never let her go hungry or without clothes or books. And she 
loves us!"

"You won an injunction preventing them from taking her away from you?"

"A temporary one, yes."

"And you've attempted to adopt her?"

"As soon as we met her, we inquired about adoption. They turned us 
down because of our age. We've tried everything we can in the last 
three years but they've stopped listening. We just get our letters 
sent back to us." She pulled a tissue out of a pocket and blew her 
nose.

"And you want to take it to court?"

"Yes. Can we do that?"

"We can certainly try. The problem will be her age. A child under 
five isn't considered to have the same understanding of the situation 
and the court deems them unable to make their own decisions. We'll 
need to find a way to introduce her testimony."

"But you can do that right?"

Lindsay smiled, "I hope so."

"Ms. Dole-"

"Please...call me Lindsay."

She hesitated, "Lindsay...we don't have a lot of money..."

Lindsay shook her head, "Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure?"

"We take on pro bono cases regularly...I'm certain there will be no 
argument from my partners over taking this case."

"Well thank you. We'll give you what we can..."

"No that isn't necessary. I'll draw up the lawsuit and file it this 
afternoon and I'll give you a call tomorrow about meeting to discuss 
more aspects of the case."

"Great. Thanks again."

"No problem." She stood up to leave and felt a sharp pain shoot 
across her abdomen. She doubled over and gasped for air.

Laura was immediately by her side, a comforting hand on her 
shoulder, "Are you okay?"

"I'm...." Lindsay sat back down. "I'm fine. I just....I just need to 
catch my breath."

Laura stared at her for a second, "You don't look very well."

"I'll be okay. This happens sometimes."

"You mean its happened before?"

Lindsay sighed. She had been hoping to keep the disease a secret for 
the time being, but now it looked like she'd have to tell. "I have 
cancer."

The older woman gasped, "I'm so sorry!"

"But please, don't worry about your case...I'll be fine to continue."

Laura almost laughed at her preposterous words, "I'm not worried 
about the case, I'm worried about you. Are you sure you're okay? Can 
I get you anything?"

"Actually a glass of water would be great."

"Sure." She bustled away and soon returned with a tall glass of 
water, ice blocks clinking in the top.

Lindsay pulled some pills from her purse and popped one into her 
mouth while her new client watched nervously.

"How long have you had it?" Laura finally asked.

"Six months."

"I'm terribly sorry."

"Don't be." Lindsay took a deep breath as the pain receded into a 
dull ache.

"My husband's sister died of cancer. Lung cancer...she was a heavy 
smoker." She shook her head sadly, and then looked up startled. "I 
didn't mean to imply that you'd die! I'm so sorry...I didn't mean 
that at all. I should learn to keep my mouth shut!"

Lindsay smiled, "The world would be a boring place if nobody said 
anything." She pulled her cell phone out of her purse. "Do you mind 
if I make a phone call?"

"No...not at all! I'll give you some privacy." She hurried out of the 
room.

Lindsay punched in a number and waited worriedly.

"What's up?" his voice asked anxiously.

"Why do you immediately think something's wrong?" she questioned 
innocently.

"Because you left to talk to a client and now you're calling me."

She sighed. "I don't feel very well and I just took some codeine. I 
can't drive home."

"What's the address?"

She opened her diary and read it for him.

"I'll be right there."

Laura Reynolds appeared once again before her, "Would you like a cup 
of coffee? Or more water?"

"Coffee would be wonderful," Lindsay replied gratefully, following 
her into the kitchen. "My husband is on his way...I'm so sorry about 
this."

"Please don't apologize." She quickly poured coffee into two mugs and 
walked back into the living room. They sat silently for a few seconds 
before Laura looked at her wryly, "Is this the reason you doubt your 
partners will argue with you about taking this for free?"

Lindsay laughed, "Maybe....its part of the reason. I really shouldn't 
say anything bad about them. They're letting me continue to work when 
most people think I should be at home in bed."

"And your husband?"

"He's my boss," Lindsay told her, waiting for the reaction.

"Oh! Well you've got him wrapped around your finger then."

"Just don't tell him that," she replied with a laugh.

"Your secret's safe with me," Laura assured her.

There was a knock at the door and Laura stood up to open it. 
Expecting Bobby, Lindsay stood up to greet him, but was met instead 
with the arrival of a young girl with large green eyes and wavy brown 
hair.

"Ash, this is Lindsay. Lindsay, Ashleigh."

Lindsay crouched down to the small girl's level, "Hi Ashleigh."

Large eyes stared back at her and in a small voice she replied, "Hi."

Lindsay sat back down. She was struck by another emotion rushing 
through her body. Sadness. Never would she experience the joy of 
having a child. The doctors had been frank about the effect of 
chemotherapy on her fertility and with one ovary already removed, 
chances of future pregnancy were slim. She and Bobby had both been 
bitterly disappointed, but she hadn't fully realized the loss until 
now.

Before she could say anything more, another knock on the door, this 
time much more urgent, echoed through the house and Bobby soon rushed 
in.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Her words felt like lies. She wasn't fine. She never 
would be fine. This cancer had destroyed all her dreams. Dreams she 
had never realized were there. His expression was still worried, his 
eyes telling her that she had scared the hell out of him. Lindsay 
turned to Laura Reynolds and the small girl. "Thanks Laura. I'll be 
in touch."

"Okay. Take care of yourself, you hear?"

"I will."

Bobby gave her a look which said `yeah right' and took her arm, 
supporting her as they walked down to his car.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Bobby, I'm fine. I get these pains all the time. The difference 
today was that I wasn't home when it happened."

They were fighting through city traffic when Lindsay gasped, "My car!"

Bobby glanced at her, he had obviously considered it already, "We can 
pick it up tomorrow."

She considered the neighbourhood she had left it in, "If its still 
there."

He turned left at the traffic lights and Lindsay frowned, "Why are 
you taking me home?"

"Because you need to rest."

"I feel good now, Bobby."

"Until the pain killers wear off and then you'll be in pain again."

"So? Work isn't going to change that. I need to file this lawsuit 
this afternoon."

"I'll do it for you."

She sighed loudly. He was staring stubbornly ahead, his jaw set and 
shoulders square. The only way she'd succeed in getting him to turn 
around would be to grab the steering wheel, which had its 
disadvantages.

She sighed again. "Fine. I'll email it to you."

"Fine."

***

Lindsay worked non-stop on her only case for the following two weeks. 
She talked regularly to the Reynolds and the more she learned about 
them, the more she knew she had to win this case.

She sat tiredly in the conference room on a Thursday afternoon. 
Everybody except Lucy was out of the office and the unusual quiet was 
met with gratitude. The door opened quietly and Lucy poked her head 
in, "Lindsay?" She had become much more human towards Lindsay and 
Bobby since the bad news and Lindsay was beginning to miss her usual 
mischievous personality.

"Yeah?"

"A Joanne Healey is here to see you?"

"Who?"

"She says it's about the young girl...Ashleigh?"

"Well show her in."

A well dressed, older woman walked into the conference room and gave 
Lindsay a warm smile, "Ms. Dole?"

"Yes. How can I help you?" Lindsay indicated to a seat.

"My name is Joanne Healey. Ashleigh Robins is my granddaughter."

Lindsay stared at her openmouthed, "How long have you known this?"

"Two days." 

"But-"

The woman raised a hand, "Please...let me explain. Susan, my 
daughter, is a heroin addict." Sadness crept into her voice and her 
bright green eyes grew dark with grief. "We knew she was using when 
she was a teenager but nothing we did...we tried rehab, therapy, drug 
tests and punishment...they all failed. And one day, we lost her. She 
just disappeared. We searched and searched for her, but the police 
wouldn't help and we were left with private investigators who 
couldn't find a trace. That was ten years ago. Three days ago she 
reappeared. Some friends brought her to our house and basically 
dumped her on the doorstep. We of course took her to hospital and 
they're treating her now. She's not...she's got Hepatitis. She told 
me two days ago that she had a baby. I must admit, I didn't believe 
her at first...but she was insistent. She kept yelling that she 
wanted to see Ashleigh. I called the department of family services 
and they told me that she was in fact telling the truth."  She paused 
as though still unable to believe what she had heard.

Lindsay swallowed. "I'm sorry about your daughter."

The mother reacted with fury, "She ruined our family! We spent years 
focusing on her, trying to get her to stop taking drugs, while she 
willingly stole from all of us to pay for them. Then we spent years 
looking for her. My youngest daughter has never recovered and my son 
attempted suicide last year. I will never forgive her for what she 
has done." Her face crumpled, "But she is my daughter. I can't turn 
my back on her. She is dying, she needs her family around her."

"You have been told that I am currently representing Ashleigh's 
foster parents to help them adopt her?"

"Yes that is what I am here about. I have been told that Susan 
requested custody of Ashleigh about six months ago. The authorities 
always prefer children to be with their real family and they 
encouraged her to find a job and a place to live. She is no longer 
able to provide for a child...." she trailed off.

Lindsay felt her heart plummet, "Are you requesting custody?"

Mrs. Healey reacted with shock, "No! No...I have enough problems in 
my family without introducing another child into the mess," she said 
sadly. "I have convinced Susan to grant custody to the foster 
parents."

Lindsay sucked in a breath, floored by the selflessness of this 
stranger.

"I have two conditions," she continued. "The first is that Susan see 
her regularly...at least until...until she gets really bad."

"And the second?"

"That I get visitation rights."

Lindsay smiled, "I'm sure that can be arranged. And will Susan allow 
the foster parents to adopt Ashleigh?"

"Susan has agreed to adoption. I have been assured that my 
granddaughter is happy where she is living."

"She is."

"Well I don't want to disrupt that."

Lindsay shook her head, amazed at the turn of events. "I should call 
my clients with the good news."

"When can Susan see Ashleigh?"

"I'll call now and let you know. Can I get you a coffee?"

"No thanks."

Lindsay left the room, positively glowing. Lucy eyed her, "Good news?"

"The best."

***

Lindsay walked into the hospital with Bobby, this time feeling none 
of the usual unease that went with her hospital visits. The Reynolds 
were following solemnly behind her, still unable to believe the turn 
of events. They had carefully explained the situation to the young 
girl and she walked now between her parents, their support and love 
obvious. 

They were met by Mrs. Healey, an excited gleam in her eye. She halted 
in her tracks at the sight of the young girl but was  soon rushed 
forwards, "You must be Laura!" she warmly shook her hand. "And David? 
Nice to meet you." She finally turned to Ashleigh, "Hi Ashleigh."

"Hi."

The group stood awkwardly. "Susan is very excited about meeting you." 
She walked ahead.

They followed with trepidation.

As soon as they walked into the comfortable hospital room a cry 
shattered the peace, "Oh my god! Is that her?"

Ashleigh shrunk back behind Laura. Laura pulled her out and led her 
forward. "Hi you must be Susan," she greeted her. "I'm Laura. And 
here's Ashleigh."

"Hi baby," Susan cried.

The small girl stared back silently and finally reached out a hand, 
offering her teddy bear to Susan. More tears erupted, this time from 
everybody in the room. Susan turned to Laura, "Thank you for looking 
after my baby."

Laura nodded, unable to talk, tears pouring down her face. Finally 
she turned to Lindsay who was still standing in the doorway. Thank 
you, she mouthed silently. 

Lindsay leaned back against Bobby feeling him wrap his arms around 
her. His nose soon tickled her neck as he kissed it tenderly and his 
voice whispered into her ear. "You did it." Lindsay smiled through 
her happy tears and watched the scene before her. For the first time 
in months she was truly happy.

***

They returned home later that night after dinner at their favorite 
restaurant. Lindsay kicked off her shoes and collapsed into bed, 
watching tiredly as Bobby stripped down to his boxers. He disappeared 
to brush his teeth and returned with her toothbrush and an empty 
glass. While she brushed he undressed her slowly and handed her her 
PJs. She handed back the toothbrush and dressed. The routine had 
become normal since she had returned to work and pursuant to their 
agreement, he made no comment on her condition. Her side of the deal 
was that she would take no more cases until the doctor gave his 
permission. But she was certain she would find a loophole in the deal.

Lindsay lay back onto her pillows, lost in thought. Bobby switched 
off the light and leaned over to kiss her.

"'Night," he whispered.

"Night." Her hand reached out for his and finding it, her fingers 
became entwined around his. "Bobby?"

"Yeah?"

She rolled over so that her head was resting on his chest, ear 
pressed against his heart. "I want to have children."

He rolled onto his side so that he was facing her, his breath warm on 
her cheek, "I do too." He whispered hoarsely.

"The doctor said..." her tears wet her cheeks as the grief poured 
out. She had been holding her emotions inside of her for weeks, but 
seeing the Reynold's happiness that day had been a trigger. No longer 
could she lie about her shattered dreams. "It's not fair."

"There is still a chance..." he whispered hopefully.

"I was thinking...maybe we could adopt..." her voice was uncertain. 
She knew Bobby had his heart set on children of their own. Carrying 
on their genes. But in her heart she knew that it would never happen.

He considered, remembering back to earlier in the evening when 
Lindsay's tough exterior crumbled away as she chatted with Ashleigh. 
He would give anything to give her a child. "After seeing Ashleigh 
today...it would be wonderful to give a home to a child like that."

He felt Lindsay's head nod. "I just want to be a mom."

He kissed her tenderly, "You will be."

***

Winter slowly gave way to Spring and with the new life in the world 
came another trip to the hospital. Lindsay packed her overnight bag 
hurriedly, madly tidying up the apartment as she did so. Bobby had 
hardly been home in the past few days as his big trial began. As she 
dashed around the apartment, mind focused on being ready by the time 
Bobby came home during his lunch break. She had suggested taking a 
cab, but he had knocked down her suggestion as though insane. "Don't 
be ridiculous," he had yelled from his study as he packed his 
briefcase. She was so intent on getting ready, she had no time to 
consider the tests that would be done that day.

Bobby finally arrived home, picked up her bag and rushed down to the 
car. She followed, slightly less sedately and fell exhausted into the 
car seat. Within minutes they were sitting in a waiting room, Bobby 
checking his watch anxiously as they waited for the doctor.

"Go," Lindsay urged. "You'll be late."

He looked at his watch again and sighed, "Okay. I'll be back tonight. 
Love you."

"Love you."

***

Déjà vu struck Lindsay as she and Bobby waited for the doctor the 
next morning. It seemed uncannily like the moment he had told them of 
the cancer's metastasis, and she felt her stomach churn at the 
prospect of more bad news. For the first time in almost a year, she 
felt good. It would be just like fate to strike her now when she was 
feeling the most optimistic. The moment of truth arrived (well the 
doctor did anyway) and she gripped Bobby's hand  for support and felt 
his return squeeze.

"I have something you might want to see," the doctor told said 
cheerfully.

They looked at him, speechless.

He grinned and sat on the seat next to the bed. He handed them a 
sheet of paper and they looked at the list of names and accompanying 
numbers. "The biopsy we took from your lymph node and these blood 
test results show that the cancer is regressing."

Silence.

"There is no medical explanation for it. But this is incredible news."

He continued to wait for a reaction. Lindsay turned to Bobby, the 
tears in his eyes mirroring the ones in her own. She felt light 
headed, her body numb with disbelief.

"She's going to be okay?" Bobby finally asked.

"We can't say that," the doctor said hurriedly. "But this is the best 
news we could have ever hoped for. I want to do more regular tests, 
but remission doesn't look too far away."

"Remission?"

The doctor nodded, "The cancer stops growing. It's still there, but 
you could stay in remission for the rest of your life. It's the best 
outcome we can hope for until someone finds a cure for cancer."

Lindsay found herself engulfed in an enormous hug. "Everything is 
going to be okay," Bobby mumbled.

***

Four years later...

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to 
Katie, happy birthday to you" people crowded around the table to 
watch the girl attempt to blow out the three candles.

Lindsay cheered with the others as one candle was snuffed by the 
breath from the little girl. Bobby, wearing a ridiculous party hat 
took endless photos of the group and Lindsay watched him with a huge 
grin. Eugene took the camera from him and pushed him in the direction 
of his daughter. "Lindsay you too," Eugene called, urging her to get 
closer. He snapped two photos of the happy trio. It was the first 
birthday they had shared with their adopted child and both were 
elated by the experience.

Lindsay turned to Bobby, content, "We did it."

He hugged her, lips pressed happily against hers, "We did."

THE END