1 Repsher. "Yeah, right, just like last week." said the excessively colorful rabbit in the corner. "Hey, be quiet! Anyway, you don't exist." said the evil doctor. "Who told you that?" asked the rabbit angrily. "The mongoose!" announced Dr. Repsher triumphantly. "That's right." said the mongoose. It was a very bright shade of green. It stepped out from behind a test tube full of a chemical which was only dangerous on Tuesdays. "You're coming with me," it continued, "to go to the Fourth Drawer!" "Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!" screamed the rabbit, as it was sucked into a convenient nearby desk. The mongoose followed. The evil Dr. Repsher placidly continued on in his evil plot. His plot was extremely complex, extremely evil, and hinged on two things: his theory of quantum gravity as an expression of the tangent of orange light, and his general dislike of chickens. It was also vaguely connected to Kentucky Sunrise. The end result of his plan was simple: to catapult all chickens on Earth into the sun. The reasoning behind this is not entirely clear, but we're pretty sure it involves warm, fuzzy logic.
There was an excessively loud noise. Far away, ancient gods woke up, looke around for the source of the noise, lost interest, and fell asleep. This explains a lot about the state of the universe today. And so began Kentucky Sunrise. Well, that's what happens when you play marches in The ClosetTM. In fact, some theories suggest that the universe was created when a large band was accidentally teleported into an infinitely small space. This is known as the Big Band theory. However, nobody takes this seriously except an invisible leprechaun named Bert. He's over there. --> Other than God and the band, nobody noticed the incredibly loud noise. Fred was not, strictly speaking, somebody. He didn't exist, at least not in the traditional sense. He used to be a janitor in a high-energy physics lab, but one of the failed experiments twisted him very slightly through time and out of this universe. His dimension intersected our universe in quite a few places, and one intersect was in the back of The ClosetTM. Fred was nearly blasted off his feet. Luckily for him, the energies involved also shifted his dimension a fraction of a fraction of a degree, and Fred popped back into existence. He found himself holding a trombone. Though Fred had no way of knowing this, it belonged to Alex Barry.
To be continued..
1. He isn't a real doctor, but it sounds better in the story. Arguably, if truth is beauty, therefore beauty is truth, therefore that which is true sounds better, and vice versa. So there.