Dearest Darling:
your indifferent 'i love you's' are wearing thin on my heart as you casually stab it ober and over as you casually smile you say you love me and treat me nice a second-rate friend gets more attention from you i don't understand... you had some juice and you washed your mouth out to dampen the flavor of foreign taste from the taste i desire strange why you did this i knew you wouldnt kiss me you'd kill me first time in months ive come homw smelling like you a sense of tangent lie though all you did was lie on my chest and feel the flutters of my heart
EVERYTIME YOU SPOKE
[because that the only time i see your lips move now] it was lovely until i asked how my heart was you answered 'fine' and probably rolled your eyes sleep is boredom in my mind and sleeping on my chest is almost an insult one that cuts under the surface as i wipe away the smear that escapes from my eyes strange why you tell me 'i dont like showing affection in public' because breaking the rules is something you really dislike strange how some show more affection in public than we do in solitude
IM DYING AND I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU
Next time I won't kiss you because if I want sympathy
I'll cut myself and talk to your friends.
Next time I count, I'll stop at 10 and re-start at 12.
That's how you make me feel...
...I'm missing you.
Becasue I don't have a lover in you.
I have someone who makes me try hard to be with them, only to realize I don't.
All this time and no emotion.
I'll strike the matches that will fuel anger to show something on your pallid face.
This stoicism makes me FURIOSO to the point of self-despair.
All this time and you finally realize our mistake.
All this time and you tell me no.
All this time I'VE FELT LIKE ABSOLUTE SHIT.
Tear us apart. You did. Tear me apart you did.
Tear yourself apart? Unlikely...
As unlikely as our union...
unlikely and hopeful...
but I love you.
and I Love You and Always will.
Sincerely,
Eric.