From: "Tanya" To: "Trish Farnan" ,,"Candace Boissennault" ,"Ines Souza" ,"Jayson Espino" ,"Jennifer Demydowich" ,"Jennifer Gilligan" ,"Jodi Dahl" ,"Lee-anna Roberts" ,"Maria Kaniouras" ,"Megan Storke" ,"Michelle Harrison" ,"Shane Senger" Subject: FW: 20 More Responses to Telemarketers Date: Thu 23/09/2004 08:36 AM Attachments Name Type Save View Part 1 text/plain Save Part 2 text/html Save -----Original Message----- From: Lee-Anna Roberts [mailto:[email protected]] Sent: September 23, 2004 7:53 AM To: [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected] Subject: Fw: 20 More Responses to Telemarketers 20 Responses to Telemarketers >> >>1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for >>bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. >> >>2. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so >>glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I >>have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes >>are sore, my dog just died . . . " >> >>3. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to >>spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then >>ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business, >>how many people work there, how they got into this line of work >>if they are married, how many kids they have, etc. Continue >>asking them personal questions or questions about their company >>for as long as necessary. >> >>4. This works great if you are male. Telemarketer: "Hi, my name >>is Judy and I'm with XYZ Company. " You: Wait for a second and >>with a real husky voice ask, "What are you wearing?" >> >>5. Cry out in surprise, "Judy? Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how >>have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief >>moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could >>know you from. >> >>6. Say "No" over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each >>one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to >>speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up. >> >>7. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and >>Friends Plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can, "I don't >>have any friends, would you be my friend?" >> >>8. If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can you get out blood? >>Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?" >> >>9. After the Telemarketer gives his or her spiel, ask him or her >>to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you >>can't just give your credit card number to a complete stranger. >> >>10. Tell the Telemarketer that you work for the same company, >>and they can't sell to employees. >> >>11. Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a >>Telemarketer, set the receiver down, scream, "Oh my God!" and >>then hang up. >> >>12. Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask >>him/her if he/she will give you his/her home phone number so you >>can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that >>telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess >>you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The >>Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" Hang up. >> >>13. Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times. >> >>14. Tell them it is dinner time, but ask if they would please >>hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat >>at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your >>dinner conversation. >> >>15. Tell the Telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and >>ask if they could bring you some beer. >> >>16. Ask them to fax the information to you, and make up a number. >> >>17. Tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I'll listen to you. But I >>should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any clothes." >> >>18. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a >>joke. "Come on, Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your >>momma?" >> >>19. Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to >>speak up . . . louder . . . louder . . . >> >>20. Tell them to talk very slowly, because you want to write >>every word down. >> >>NOTICE: The above have all been tested and approved for use on >>telemarketers. No animals were harmed in the testing >> >> >> >> >> >>============================================================ >> >>This communication is intended for the use of the recipient to >>which it is addressed, and may contain confidential, personal and >>or privileged information. Please contact us immediately if you are >>not the intended recipient of this communication, and do not copy, >>distribute, or take action relying on it. Any communication >>received in error, or subsequent reply, should be deleted or >>destroyed. >> >>============================================================ >> >> >> >> >>---------------------------------------------------------------------------- >> >>This communication is intended for the use of the recipient to >>which it is addressed, and may contain confidential, personal, and >>or privileged information. Please contact us immediately if you are >>not the intended recipient of this communication, and do not copy, >>distribute, or take action relying on it. Any communication >>received in error, or subsequent reply, should be deleted or >>destroyed. >> > -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Share a single photo or an entire slide show right inside your e-mail with MSN Premium: Join now and get the first two months FREE*
Hosted by www.Geocities.ws

1