Funny Quotes

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

Your village called. They're missing their idiot.

Three out of four voices in my head said I should stay home and clean the guns.

I've had it with reality. Now I want my fairy godmother.

Reality bites!... and I have the teeth marks to prove it!

Hell had no space so I came back

Moody bitch seeks nice guy for love-hate relationship

Support mental health or I'll kill you

you can't change your mind, are you sure you still have one?

Get real stoned: Drink wet cement

Of all the things I've lost, it's my mind I miss the most.

I don't believe in violence, so don't make me kill you

I say "no" to drugs but they just won't listen!

I don't lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily.

Only users lose drugs

Warning: Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.

Please don't hit me -- My lawyer's in jail.

I love kids, but I can't eat a whole one.

My honor student fired your stupid kid

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