(Off the Cuff Answers)
1) How is your outdoor stalker's Christmas tree fairing? Oh, it's fine. I'm actually really pleased with it! It's a goofy yet accurate expression of how I feel about the situation with this turd bag whose been stalking us for slightly over two years now. Creating it was good catharsis for me.
2) Is there any evidence to indicate that the alleged perpetrator (A-P) has taken notice of this tree? Nope, not at all. But that's OK by me. I really put it up and decorated it to process the stalking some more. It's not like I bought the A-P turd-bag it-thing Christmas gifts or anything.
3) Can you describe the tree for any of our artistic viewers who may be interested in this idea? Well, I used used an old artificial tree we've had lying around for about seven years and I utilized a wide variety of decorations. I started with some old traditional decorations that were too ragged to be desirable for us or extras from what we placed on our indoor tree. The traditional decorations symbolized the A-P's sick attempts to destroy any and all aspects of our lives whenever possible and his attraction to pulling crap on the holidays especially. I had to purchase some additional decorations because I didn't have enough old ones. So I went to the dollar store and bought only packages, not singles, to keep the cost way down. I also chose decorations that were not made of glass so that the A-P couldn't smash glass all over my back porch. Then I added tons of homemade decorations. Old and new bead work decorations. And also paper based decorations. The paper decorations contained nasty-grams and reality statements. I placed about five candy canes on the tree to give it some more traditional spin. I bought the canes in packages of a dozen at bargain shops too. Those not used on the stalker tree were great for our indoor tree. Lastly I added toy soldiers and police figures, aircraft and vehicles. I bought inexpensive bags of these figures again to keep the project fun and inexpensive. The soldier figures represented the A-P's delusional view, as I see it, that he is some kind of Rambo character. The police figures represented the obvious police action and lack of action in this situation as in all stalking situations. I should stress that I believe any other victim who wants to try this should use their own imagination and just keep it fun and inexpensive and good for processing. The nasty-grams kind of take after the ancient and time tested idea of writing a letter or letters to an abuser who has perpetrated against you telling them what you think of them. The depth of these letters is up to the victim. It doesn't matter whether or not you actually send the letters; the idea is to simply write them. To make the nasty-grams I used a cup to trace the circles, wrote my messages, thoughts, whatever, colored the circles over with crayon because it was what was around, pasted two sides with messages together and added a tape layer for some extra water protection since it was raining on and off. Again, using the crayon kept the cost down; it's not worth spending a lot of money, in my opinion, to do something like this. So I used what was handy in the house whenever possible. And then I used ornament hooks, an entire package for under a dollar at Wal-Mart, to hang the paper stuff on the tree. I would suggest that any victim considering doing this use permanent marker to write her thoughts on the decorations! This way the stalker can't steal the processing decorative messages and alter the meanings. I'm not kidding; I wouldn't put it past one of these freaks to change the meanings to whatever he wants it to say. For example, someone like the A-P could erase and change a message like, "I hate you and I think you're a pathetic turd-bag," to "I love you and miss you," or whatever trips his sick trigger at the moment. By doing this he could further justify his obsessions. He may even be able to convince himself that you wrote what he altered the message to mean. Never forget how determined a stalker could be to hear you say something you're not saying! So, really, use permanent marker, like a sharpie laundry marker! Also remember that creating a stalker tree might really tick the stalker off and cause him to react. Don't think your stalker is harmless. You have to consider if this act of catharsis is worth it to you as a victim or not. And definitely educate yourself about how a stalker could react to things like this before you do it! Other than this, I might add that I used some rope I had around the house and tied the Christmas tree frame to posts on three sides to prevent the wind from knocking it over. This made it all around low maintenance. I didn't have to think about picking it or decorations up off the floor every day because a breeze tipped it over.
4) It sounds like you truly enjoyed creating your stalker tree. So, you aren't disappointed that the message of the tree didn't affect the alleged perpetrator (A-P)? Other than the fact that a Stalkadillo solo donation would have been a nice treat, no I'm not really disappointed. It really didn't matter to me if the A-P saw it or not. It was and is my statement for my reasons, not his. In part it states that I refuse to be terrorized any longer. I refuse to allow the A-P's stalking to put a damper on things. I'm turning his terrorism around to benefit myself as much as possible. The stalker won't change, so the stalking victim has to change. It's a matter of adaptation.
5) Do you believe that the alleged perpetrator would be interested in such a symbolic occurrence? It's hard to say with the A-P. Most stalkers fresh in the stalking patterns of behaviors would be extremely interested and potentially extremely dangerous when presented with something like this. However, the A-P has been at it for so long and his obsessions and delusions are so fixed. His sick recreation of reality is so static, set in stone. I almost doubt he'd be interested. Not to mention he revels in the Easy Pickens to the maxim. I don't think this tree is Easy Pickens enough because it's too close to a phone where I could dial 911.
6)Would you be eager to contact law enforcement at this time? It's a toss up yet it's rather unlikely since the police seem to be waiting for a homicide before it's worth their time. Besides, where I'm at and from one good solid past experience with 911 and countless other experiences not using 911, it takes them over an hour to respond to a 911 call and several hours, days or months to respond to anything other than a 911 call. So what's the point? Calling the police is oftentimes a waste of time and effort. It's especially frustrating when the stalker is long gone and I think of all the other things I'd rather be doing than waiting for the police to arrive several hours or days later only to laugh and comment about how the stalkers not around at the moment! LOL! It's like they expect him to move on in and wait for them to come over. So I find myself thinking about the hot bath I'd like to be luxuriating in with a good novel or the much needed sleep I'd like to indulge in while waiting for the police. After awhile, after several months or a year, as a victim, that nonstop adrenaline rush from seeing the perpetrator or hearing him in the brush wears off. Maybe, as a victim, you become numb or worn out or simply sick of it. Even if the terror is fresh in your mind, as a victim, it's further draining to wait endless hours for the police to arrive, you'd rather rest or do something else more relaxing to calm yourself down. Thus waiting hours, and wondering if it's going to be the next morning or afternoon or several days later before you'll see the police and file a report becomes a negative for the victim. Calling the police is just not a very pleasant thing at all. Hopefully this situation is at least a little bit better for most other victims.
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No rights to copy, print, download, duplicate, or display elsewhere other than upon this specific website granted or implied without the direct written permission of the author. Please contact agent of the author: Mr. Gunther S. Vanludwick at [email protected]
**As with all poetry, essays, correspondence and/or published letters, e-mails or other communications presented on this webpage, this work is a personal subjective expression of its author's own feelings, thoughts, beliefs, and opinions. This statement is in no way intended to invalidate or minimize the powerful and poignant experiences of this author. However, this statement is intended to indicate that creative expressions such as these written forms of artwork are derived from their author's own personal feelings, thoughts, beliefs and opinions.
**This work was designed to represent a casual chat session with Lady Lost. This work has not been edited for typos and spelling errors.
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