(Off the Cuff Answers)
1) Does any portions of your, "Demand Letter," mirror any part of the alleged perpetrator's (A-P's) correspondences? Sure. After being stalked and hounded by a loony tune for two years that becomes somewhat inevitable. The huge difference in my demand letter is that my points are truly valid. He chose to react to my rejection of him, after a brief approximately four-month relationship, by stalking and terrorizing me, my family and various co-victims! The only things in reality that I did to him in his life are the following: A) I gave him a chance to be with me. B) I broke off the relationship with him twice. After the second time of breaking up with him I made it permanent. His second chance lasted only about two weeks. There was even a gap in the relationship, during that four-month time span, where he went out of town for several weeks. So, the entire relationship wasn't really even four months long.
2) Could you attempt to describe to our many readers what happened to cause you to reject him? For the sake of depicting some warning signs for others in a potentially bad situation, sure. He became very obsessed with me very quickly. He used to follow my girlfriend around constantly, by her account, hounding her for information about me. He wanted to know every detail of my entire life from birth on. He became extremely controlling towards me in every aspect of my life. He tried to control all of the following: A) My working situation. B) My career-education choices. C) Whether or not I purchased a piece of land I wanted at the time. D) What money I used to buy the land, which he was opposed to my buying. E) Where the land was located. F) Whether or not I built anything on the land if I defied him and bought it anyway. G) What kind of car I purchased. H) How many pets I could have. I) What kind of pets I could have and in what numbers. J) Whether or not I went back into the equine business and how to conduct the business if I went back into it. K) When I called him, etc. And it went on and on like that. Whatever I was thinking about doing with my life or in my life he had to be involved and controlling it, telling me how I should do it. I was working a graveyard shift job at the time, and if I told him I'd call him at noon the next day and didn't because I slept in he'd freak. He'd call me and say how worried he was when I didn't call on time and how angry that made him and then he'd basically read me the riot act for not calling him exactly when I said I would. He started telling me why I had the number of animals I had and he wouldn't listen to any theory that contradicted his theory. Then he started making a lot of very subtle yet strange and disturbing statements. He began asking a lot of subtle yet strange questions too, but they weren't totally questions. He started saying how he thought my mother had munchausens by proxy, even though he had never met her or any other member of my family and there were tons of other more logical explanations for things than that! I was pretty taken aback by these suggestions, which he was making. These questions, made more in a statement way really, were confusing to me. It wasn't logical. I had no memory of anything that would even begin to indicate something like this. Then he started asking strange questions, again more in a statement way, about my son. Still he was extremely subtle. He always called my son, "The Boy," and this was both abrasive and eerie. However, the true meaning of his behaviors wasn't clear, as I watched him interact with my girlfriend's son, and he seemed basically uninterested in this other child yet not a particular threat to him. So I just couldn't determine, or put my finger on, what exactly was raising my hackles. Anyway, I offered to let him spend some family time with me and my son yet he declined and kept going with his subtle questions presented more in a statement manner. I couldn't really figure out for sure where he was going with it all at that time. Nothing in my life, not even my education, had ever prepared me for this kind of situation or that kind of thought pattern. The subtle strangeness became a little less subtle and the controlling behaviors continued. He began making statements that really upset me and he just wouldn't hear anything to the contrary. I noticed he began flipping statements I made, changing my words around. I eventually broke off the relationship with him and the rest is all a matter of bad history.
3) What were the key points in the above depiction? The controlling behaviors, the obsessive behaviors, the hounding my friend for information constantly, the subtle statements about bizarre things he had no evidence to support, changing my words around, and his unwillingness to listen to reality or consider other explanations. He became fixated on the most bizarre possibilities imaginable and ignored anything and everything else. So I guess the obsession factor goes far beyond an obsession with me and into a fixation on some really nasty horrible topics, such as munchausens. An added piece of advice I can give this site's readers is that it's not wise to get into a relationship when you're vulnerable enough, as I was, to want to believe someone is a really good person despite some warning signs to the contrary. The second part of this advice is, run like a bat out of Hell from anyone who displays any of these warning signs!
4) Can you tell this site's readers a little bit about the girlfriend the alleged perpetrator was using as his primary source? Yes, basically she is someone I had known since she and I were about 11 or 12 years old. However, we'd gone drastically separate ways in life starting in the teen years. It wasn't anything specifically that she did that I looked down on or as far as I know and visa versa. But she partied a lot when she was a teenager and I didn't. So we went separate ways. Anyhow, we became friends again from time to time when we were older, but we were never very close or anything after the initial-time that we went our separate ways.
5) It doesn't sound like she was the best source of information? No, she really wasn't and any logical person would know that, but the A-P (alleged perpetrator) isn't a logical person!
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**As with all poetry, essays, correspondence and/or published letters, e-mails or other communications presented on this webpage, this work is a personal subjective expression of its author's own feelings, thoughts, beliefs, and opinions. This statement is in no way intended to invalidate or minimize the powerful and poignant experiences of this author. However, this statement is intended to indicate that creative expressions such as these written forms of artwork are derived from their author's own personal feelings, thoughts, beliefs and opinions.
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