On the Empire Builder:

Gee but it’s great to be back home again (John Denver) I think I passed his smiling angel on the train! (yes somewhere around the Rockies)

Never drive faster than your angels can fly--bumpersticker

We weren’t but one stop outside of Chicago, when the train (still moving slowly, thank all the gods in Heaven) came to an abrupt, but not too violent halt. We sat for quite a while. Eventually we moved again and as trains do, picked up speed as we passed out of urban zones.

Shortly after, the driver came on the PA system. "You may have noticed we came to an emergency stop back there folks. We had a semi pull out onto the tracks, going around the flashing lights, and the crossbars. Had we not stopped we would have hit him. Please go home and remember to tell your friends, your neighbors, everyone you know, and raise your children to understand YOU NEVER GO AROUND THE CROSSBARS WHEN THEY ARE FLASHING." There was more, plainly he was very upset, and very happy everyone was still alive including the truck driver, even if he was dumb as a box of rocks. "I hope you got his license" I yelled.

People still wave at trains all across the country (a warm and fuzzy feeling!) The prairie is beautiful, lots of lakes, ponds, seasonal swamps, ducks geese and miscellaneous birds all grubbling for stubble in old wheat fields. Prairie chickens leaped up sometimes, spreading their tails. Many of the towns we went through, if I were stuck there, I might slit my wrists, or at least get on the train and LEAVE. Some of the Rez’s were horrible, filthy. I think we went through the head waters of the Mississippi. There had to be all sorts of owls in those drowned forests as we slipped through the wetlands in the growing gloom of evening.

We were a few more hours down the road, somewhere in Nebraska, one of the conductor-attendants happened to be standing near my spot, and I heard on his walky talky "rotating cloud" the train had again stopped. I had been trying to curl up and sleep behind a seat, but that got me up in a hurry. The attendant got equally active, we both dove for windows on opposite sides of the train (my old aircrew training kicked in, when the call goes out it’s EVERY set of eyes looking out as spotters!) We saw clouds actually rotating, freaky. Thank God no funnels came down (it tried, but didn‘t), though I think there might have been a small twister up ahead of us, the driver could see. When we started slowly moving again (about a 20 min wait!) I could hear more talk about "debris on the track". Man that could get ugly. What if it had happened at NIGHT??? The week after I got home, tornados touched down in Southeastern Virginia, right where I had driven through on Hwy 81, and a few days later in Kansas, so I figure I have angels keeping an eye on me. Thank you angels.

I learn more and more that the Conductor is God on the train, and you don’t mess with them. The lady attendant I chatted with about knitting came back muttering once, and sure enough, they had caught someone smoking in the bathrooms! (all trains are non-smoking in America now, but they do try to make time for smoke stops). "If caught smoking you WILL be put off this train" and probably in a "reeeel lonesome spot" as Jimmy Dean uses to wail about in his songs. Another time I had my feet up on the chair in front of me (no one was in it) and the HEAD Conductor came along and in this tone of voice you DIDN’T mess with growled "get your feet down" YIKE I complied! You don’t mess with train people! (I had a flask of tequila in my knitting bag, but boy did I keep it discreet!)

When I woke up that night, pre-dawn, we were stopping right after Fargo ND (Grand Forks, and equally cold!) Shades of Buddy Holly, and thank God it wasn’t Feb 3. Another attendant told me that the entire north side of the train had been blanketed with snow in the night, a horrible blizzard struck us. It was mostly melted when I woke up, but I felt very sorry for those folks getting off in the pre dawn hours, in horizontal blowing snow. At the next daylight stop, I got off to stretch my legs, and the undercarriage of the train was carrying huge chunks of snow still! And this is very late in April! No global warming here!!!!

My phone didn’t work much out there. Sprint has a dead zone in Montana (I asked Stephan) "we have one highway and one town that is hot for us and that‘s IT" UGH

One last adventure, thankfully didn’t happen to me. There were some old guys in my car, who were mildly funny, I eavesdropped on them a bit. When you stop at stations, sometimes there is a smoke break, and folks run into the stations for food (it’s so expensive on the train). Well, as we pulled away from a station in Montana, someone got on the PA and said "hold the train we are missing someone!" one of the old guys missed movements! The other couple had BARELY jumped on as it started moving, Man that should be a lesson to all of us, don’t get too far away and listen for the All Aboard!! The pilot didn’t hold it, as he was trying to make up time (you can just hear them up there, "we warned you!") As we picked up speed, they had cell phones out, and one person yelled "There’s the taxi!" the old guy got a taxi and it sped ahead, doing 85 in places, to catch up at the next stop! Said it cost him $100. He made it, and they giggled about it the rest of the way into Seattle.

We went through some beautiful mountains, saw elk, neat ski resorts, places it would be fun to stay if I were dripping in cash and had the time (Whitefish). Then in Spokane, as promised, they split the train (I could feel it happening and woke up, 2 am), and one batch went to Portland, and we went to Seattle. They took the snack car with them to Oregon, so I had to eat breakfast in the diner, overpaying for some very gluey French toast.

When we pulled into of this very long tunnel over the Cascades, the conductor came on the PA "we are now going into the Cascade Tunnel, and when we come out the other side, if we see our shadow, that means 6 more weeks of winter" ahahah the Sun was shining when we came out, get ready for snow! (Actually I got home, and everything is budded out and the birds are singing beautiful songs, so it wasn’t true). AHHH back to the land of Cascadia! Wild Yellow calla lilies were coming up along the tracks in Washington mountain swamp areas. I spotted eagles (being chased by crows!) and knew I was home.

We actually made up our time lost, and with the time changes, got in on schedule! What a shock! As we pulled into the Seattle station, it had to go forward, and then back into the berth. The attendant on my door opened the hatch, and yelled out to his wife "Hello Sweetie!" it was very cute. That must be sorta nice coming home to your loved ones like that, after going cross country. Trains are fun, and I’ve gotten to the point that I can sleep on them now, so long as I have room for my legs. It wasn’t crowded at all, not like the Coast Starlight, we were all able to spread out in our own double chairs, and snooze pretty well in Coach. It just takes time, if you have it, that’s good, but if not, you are doomed to ride planes I suppose.

The children onboard were pretty well behaved (a couple of gals from Chicago were on there with their four kids, one of the Moms kept running her little girl down, she would take dead runs down the aisle, with Mom grabbing at her all the way… very cute). I passed another family with three little ones, all in jammies, and coloring busily. Kids sleep well on trains. It’s the only way to fly.

I finally caught up on some sleep here, I’m not sure why. Unfortunately my body clock usually has me up at five or six in the morning, and staying up late at night after rock concerts sure isn’t a good way to get one’s beauty sleep (I suspect I looked like hell by Hershey). Anyway even on the train I STILL got up at the crack of dawn, but at least I had gone to sleep early the night prior, rocking to the rhythms. And you wake up about every two hours on a train, afraid you’re missing something out in the speeding blackness of ink.

I debarked easily (Godzilla rode the whole way on a bottom rack, and I lugged him off the train myself) rolled off for the ferry dock. I passed rose petals strewn on a street corner in Seattle, somehow seemed metaphorical for the end of my trip. The station was a dodgy place even in the daylight! Another half hour hike (good for me), to the dock. The ferry ride was wonderful and Stephan picked me up at the other end, dumping me back at my door. It is so nice to be home, where I can cook my own stir fry and veggie soups, without worry about salt and carbs. Whew!

Life goes on. In the week I was back, I had two job interviews, one children’s concert, one visit from a real Iditarod musher and her sled dog, worked three days, watched the Big Guy hit his 300th homer (yahoo!!!!!!!!!!) plan to see Iron Man as soon as it comes out, and bought The Golden Compass to watch in my spare time. Not to mention washed all my dirty laundry, and typed up my notes. Back to Reality eh?

So what did I learn? 1) ignore pond scum and 2) I can’t seem to get through life without puncturing false pride in others, and falling in love with unattainable heroes. And 3) I learned that Falling Water really IS worth going to see. Pictures don’t tell the whole story. 4) And I learned there is a whole ’nuther half to our country, that is actually a good deal like the half of the country I already know. Fancy that. And 5) I learned I have very very nice pen pals, and I should get around to seeing them more often. That includes the Moodies I guess. OH and 6) there really ARE nice Moody fans out there, who are just here for the music, not some weird fan politics.

Have a beer and a banana for me, and say it with love……….