If I Didnt Have You

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My journey through life has taught me some tough lessons.
Many times I have stood in tears asking God just why he
thought I just had to know of and learn of such things.
I know the answer to many of those and no clue to others.
I sat a few years ago sitting on a girlfriends couch, in tears
just sure there was no honest man left on earth, and that
knowing a true love was never to be one of my joys to know.
That there was no such thing as a "soul-mate" out there
for Spirit.I was then and would forever be a lone wolf.
As I lay my head on the arm of that couch and slowly drifted
off to sleep.(Now all this is honest. The way things happened
that day.)The Front door suddenly opened and in walked this man I had never
met.My girlfriends Uncle.As he walked across in front of me,briefly glancing down at me
I not only saw but well,just couldnt help suddenly feel his presence
in this room.(ok...I admit...that butt in tight jeans helped!!).
He made it half way across the room,stopped,turned around and
demanded to know just who I was.I still see him these few years later
clearly in my mind. Standing there with his hands on his hips,
His eyes so deep,questioning. A scene I will never forget.
For God had opened that front door and sent his answer to my prayers
and tears that day.God in his wisdom knowing what I needed had taken care
of me once again.

There is no way to tell you how wonderful my husband is.
He came into a heart not only in pieces but with many protective
walls in place.A heart wanting and needing the love and care he
had to give but yet so afraid to trust and believe in love.
But God knew this man could build and put back that heart.
I love him SO much. I truly do not know what I would do without him
I am not sure how or if I could have made it safely through so many things
that have happened the last couple of years.Things we still must face
daily. Not things either of us have done,but what the actions of others
have put us through.

While many times I have faltered he has been there each and every time
to hang on to me tightly. I know for him at times this has not been easy.
He has to battle not only the things going on around us,but a wife
afraid to let go and trust completely.
I have dedicated this site and this page to him.

If I didnt have you in my life,Sweetheart,I would truly be lost.

So for those times when my own words are lost for the moment,
think always of this song. Know you are always in my heart.
I love you more than any words here or in life can truly tell you.
You are a gift from God and I thank him.
IF I didnt have you in my life,for me it would be no life,for you ARE my life.

I will love you forever and always...Your wife...Spirit.

Song By: Vince Gill
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