Who, you ask?

Joseph (aka Joey) is a serial liar and wannabe photographer who is polluting the internet with his inaccurate 'tutorials' and making outlandish claims as to his credentials and qualifications. He also publishes fabricated previews and fake specification videos for unreleased and non-existant products.

He is also the face behind the YouTube channel "Nikon Help Hotline" (AKA Nikon Hot Helpline), an infamous collection of errors, lies and poor information for budding photographers. A classic case of the blind leading the blind!

Should you wish to contact him, his email address is [email protected]. Good luck getting any sense out of him though, his standard response to anyone who corrects him is to ignore them or make some derogatory comment.

Delusions of Grandeur

Joey's website header, an obvious (and illegal) copy of the
National Geographic trademark

According to his YouTube page "As the Nikon Professional Member (N.P.S.) and Director of Photography of Western Coast for National Geographic, I enjoy travelling across the world to help new entry photographers! He's now pulled that information (after being exposed as a liar), but you can see a screenshot of the old profile here.

Joey certainly has a very vivid imagination if he really thinks anyone believed that a 19-year-old wannabe with no experience or qualifications could possibly be a photography director for the world's most prestigious nature magazine! He's even stolen the National Geographic's trademark yellow rectangle and designed his own (very poor) website around it!

Unfortunately for Joey, the magic of the internet can reveal the truth. According to the Web Archive copy of his own website's biography page, until 2005 his only cameras were small, cheap point-and-shoot cameras, and he didn't get his first SLR camera (a base-model Nikon D70) until sometime after Christmas in 2004. His Bio also states that (as at April 2006) "He's currently searching for a good paying job that could help him meet the expense of the D2X in the future". So he really expects people to believe that a 19-year-old, who didn't get a proper camera until 18 months earlier and has no formal photography experience has risen from nowhere to become the National Geographic Director of Photography?! Just in case the web archive disappears, you can see a screenshot of the page here.

• April 2006: Unemployed, has owned his first SLR camera (a $1000 Nikon D70) for 15 months after saving for a year. Source: Joey's home page (Archived version).
• July 2007: Now apparently a "professional skateboard photographer"! Owns every Nikon DSLR ever made, plus 22 professional lenses and other assorted equipment! Total value: Over $90,000 worth! Source: Joey's forum profile.
• October 2007: Now also claims to own a Canon 1D Mark III camera as well. Source: Joey forum post.
• January 2008: Now listed as a nondescript photographer/web designer. Interestingly, he now claims to own considerably less digital equipment compared to 6 months earlier. He does, however, now claim to own a series of discontinued film bodies and claims his F5 died in 2005 Even though in April 2006 he told us he only owned a D70 and was looking for a job! Source: Joey's forum profile.
• January 2008: Visits a forum and asks how to take a long exposure photograph. Seems odd for a professional photographer! Source: Joey's forum post.
• January 2008: Now says he's not a professional and doesn't work in magazines or anything like that. Source: Joey's forum post.
• February 2008: Joey gets an absolute caning for lying in a post in relation to infra-red photography. Source: Joey's forum post.
• February, 2008: Joey is now apparently the Director of Photography for National Geographic magazine and an instructor at Brooks Institute of Photography. Just three short years after getting his first camera, still unable to spell or write English and a month after saying he wasn't professional and didn't work for a magazine. Wow, what a meteoric rise from nowhere! Source: Joey's YouTube page.

But, just in case you still believe Joey's National Geographic fairytale, why not take a look at the magazine's masthead credits. You'll find no mention of the infamous Mr Spina there! Still think he may be telling the truth? Give them a call and ask for him. Their number is (310) 820-2177. They'll tell you that they've never heard of a Joseph Nicholas Spina. Somebody posted that on his youtube page, but it miraculously disappeared! But, you can see a screenshot of the comment before he deleted it.

Update 10/27/08 - Joey's 'funny photography quotes' exposed as another piece of make-believe:

Joey has posted another of his bizarre not-so-funny quotes videos. I'm sure anyone with half a brain has worked out that they are mostly figments of his imagination, but now we can prove it. In his latest attempt at humor he give a quote purported to have been made during a Ventura College "Medium Format 101" photography class. But, if you download the complete Ventura College photography degree listings (PDF), you'll see that they don't offer a single medium format class. Hard to have a quote from a class that doesn't exist, don't you think!

Update 10/26/08 - Funny video; NatGeo cease-and-desist; and an email from Joey:

As we all dyslexicly await the launch of the Nikon Help Hotline (or Nikon Hot Helpline, depending on which part of the page you read!), Joey has released one of his stupidest tutorials yet, demonstrating once again his total incompetence on anything photographic. Check the table below for my refute.

National Geographic has also caught up with him now and ordered him to stop claiming he works for NatGeo, pull down all the pages of his website (which was a clear violation of their trademarked yellow rectangle) and to remove a video from youtube which falsely superimposed one of his photographs on a NatGeo front cover. Well done NatGeo. One more nail in the coffin of this internet hack.

Joey also sent me an email! Guess I got under his skin. Read the whole thing here, but I'll just answer a couple of his points:

National Geographic Lie update 8/1/08:

Joey has updated his YouTube profile, which now says he's been the National Geographic Director of Photography for 3.5 years (Since he was 16 and a half!). Thanks for the update Joey. You've just done a wonderful job revealing your own lie, as your bio page from 2006 says you were unemployed at that time, which was only 2 years ago.

NPS Lie update 8/1/08:

You'd be aware that Joey also claims to be a member of Nikon Professional Services (NPS). It says so on his youtube profile and he even made a video about it. Thanks to a reader who forwarded me an email from NPS, we now know that is also a lie. No surprise really! See a screenshot of the email here. I've blurred the names and addresses for privacy reasons. And, according to himself in this March 2008 forum post, he is not a member of NPS. Nice of Joey to expose his own lies.

Brooks Institute Lie update 8/1/08:

You'd also be aware that Joey has long claimed to be a student at the respected Brooks Institute of Photography. In the same 12-month period, he claimed to be a 3rd-year student, a 4th-year student and a graduate! Now, 6 months later in a youtube video, he claims to be a teacher at Brooks! Unfortunately for Joey, I gave them a call and asked about him. I was told he's never been a student there, let alone a teacher! I was also told they had received several complaints about his bizarre behaviour. His case is currently being investigated by their legal department.

On the popular photography website, dpreview.com, Joey is a serial pest. He has at least two accounts. The first one is under the ID Darth Vader II and another under the ID Cookie-Monster. He also had another one, under SleepStreamer81 but it was removed by site management because of his troublemaking. In case he wipes the profiles, see screenshots here and here. I recommend going through his posting history. It's pretty good for a laugh.

Lies, Damn Lies and........Misinformation

We've already dealt with the lies about being a National Geographic Director, Brooks teacher and NPS member. But that's just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. Joey's YouTube Channel is choc full of rubbish. Usually, these are just stupid mistakes rather than outright lies. But it's not without harm. He's professing to be an expert in all things photographic, but just about every tutorial contains major errors of fact and technique. Let's take a look. Be aware that as these lie busters come to his attention, he'll probably pull them down so he doesn't look like a complete idiot. Some of these points may seem minor, but let's not forget this idiot claims to be a photography director at a major international magazine. Yet he can't spell and seems to have a very weak grasp of grammar and punctuation. His tutorials are chock-full of mistakes, some of which are incredibly wrong and just serve to confuse budding photographers.

If you're looking to improve your photography, the absolute last thing you should do is listen to any of his flawed 'tutorials'.

Let's rip a few apart:

Link to his tutor	Screenshot of his tutorial	Error descriptions
AutoFP flash		Once again, Joey demonstrates his complete lack of understanding of anything photographic. So many monumental errors, so little space.... Error 1: "AutoFP stands for Automatic Flash Power". Oh man, I'm still laughing about this! What a moron. FP stands for "Focal Plane". The x-sync speed limitation is due to the focal plane shutter used by DSLR cameras. At higher shutter speeds, a standard flash would only illuminate a 'slit' of the image. FP sync overcomes this by firing the flash strobscopically during the exposure. FP sync has actually been around for quite some time. You can read about FP sync and understand how and why it works here. Error 2: "AutoFP adjusts the flash power...". ROFLMAO. Idiot! Ever since auto-thryster flash units arrived (1970s) flashes have automatically adjusted the flash power output. Does he really no know that's how A and TTL flash works? The big deal about FP is that it can overcome the focal plane shutter speed limitations. Joey just doesn't understand how it works. Error 3: "Without AutoFP the aperture is locked". What!!?? Is he serious? Now here's one you can disprove yourself. Go set your Nikon flash to TTL, then set the camera to 'A', now set the aperture to, say f/4. Take a photo. Now, change the aperture to f/5.6. Take another photo.... OH MY GOD! It works! The aperture isn't locked! Either Joey is wrong, or you have a magic camera. Feel free to repeat the experiment in 'P' or 'S' modes too, but this time the camera will actually vary the aperture automatically. More magic! Seriously, this guy re-defines the term 'moron'.
14-24G ED-IF		Error 1: "This lens replaces the 17-35 which is discontinued". Wrong. It doesn't replace it, and it's not discontinued. See here. Joey also previously claimed in a forum post that the Nikon 17-55DX replaced the 17-35. Also incorrect and even more stupid given that the 17-55 is a DX lens while the 17-35 is full frame. Error 2: "This is the first AF-S f/2.8 G-type lens". Wrong. The 17-55G DX, 70-200G VR, 105G VR micro, 200/2G VR and the 300/2.8G VR were all released before this lens and are all G type, AF-S, f/2.8 lenses. Error 3: "Not recommended for DX cameras because it's not as wide as on FX cameras". Yet another moronic statement. Using his stupid theory, the same could be said of ANY lens. And this guy says he's the Photographic Director of Nat Geo? ROFL.
50mm f/1.4 AF IF		Error 1: There is no such lens as a 50mm f/1.4 AF IF. "IF" stands for Internal Focussing. None of Nikon's 50mm prime lenses are of IF design. Take a look at Nikon's own website for this lens. You'll see that it is not an IF lens. Error 2: He says that Nikon's acronym "ED" stands for Extra Density. As anyone with basic Nikon knowledge could tell you it means "Extra-low Dispersion" glass. You can confirm this here on Nikon's lens glossary. Error 3: He says that the 50/1.4 focusses faster than the 50/1.8. This is incorrect. Due to the additional, larger glass elements the 1.4 version focusses slightly slower than the 1.8 version.
85mm f/1.4D AF-IF		Error 1: He calls this lens an 'ED' lens. This lens does not have any ED (Extra-low Dispersion) glass elements. You can read Nikon's own specifications here. Error 2: "The 85/1.4 is not a good portrait lens". Ridiculous. It is in fact, quite possibly the best Nikon-mount portrait lens on the planet. Error 3: "Portrait Lens don't exist. Any lens will do this". Another moronic statement. There are many lenses (such as the 50 and 85mm primes and 105 and 130mmDC lenses) that are specifically designed for portrait work. Another example of Joey's total lack of knowledge on the subject of photography. Error 4: "Be sure to adjust D3 focussing to +7". Total, absolute and complete rubbish. AF fine tune is designed for specific examples of a lens, not for specific models. If you adjust to +7, you will almost certainly get out of focus shots.
60mm f/2.8 D Micro		Error 1: Contrary to his description, this lens has no ED elements. Read here. Error 2: "This lens is not designed for closeup work". Idiot. It's a MICRO lens. It's primary purpose IS closeup work. Ask Nikon. Error 3: "This is a NOCT lens. NOCT stands for Nikon Optical Company Team". Wrong, wrong. This is not a Noct lens. Noct is not an acronym anyway, it is an abbreviation for Nocturnal. There has only ever been one Noct lens, the 58mm/1.2. It is identified by the Noct label on the lens barrel. Read about it here. Error 4: "The new G version suffers diffraction at f/5.6". Rubbish. Diffraction limits are set by the aperture, pixel density and format, not a specific lens at a specific aperture. Joey proves just how incompetent he is on this topic with this forum post, made just 3 months before this video, where he admits he has no idea what diffraction is! Error 5: "New G version cannot deliver sharp images". More rubbish. It is a perfectly fine lens, easily equal to the old version.
24-70 G		Error 1: "Not recommended for DX cameras because it's not as wide as on FX cameras". Yet another moronic statement. Using his stupid theory, the same could be said of ANY lens. And this guy says he's the Photographic Director of Nat Geo? ROFL. Error 2: "Some versions were made in China". Absolute rubbish. Every single copy of this lens is made in Japan. Idiot. Error 3: "Use f/16 for max sharpness on a D3". Idiot. The lens is sharpest on ANY camera at f/8-11. Anyone capable of reading an MTF chart will show you that. The sensor size has no bearing on sharpness whatsoever unless the sensor is diffraction-limited which may occur on a high-density DX sensor (eg D300) at settings above f/11.
70-200 G		Error 1: "Vignetting on D3 occurs only if you don't tighten the lens". What a ridiculous statement. Anyone who has used a Nikon DSLR will know that if you don't tighten a G lens all the way, it simply won't work. The lens must be fully locked for the electrical contacts, and therefore the lens, to operate. To imagine you can use this lens when it's not fully mounted is ridiculous. Error 2: "Lens is best on a D3 at f/16". Completely incorrect. Take a look at this comparison of lens sharpness at various focal lengths. You'll see that the lens is sharper with less falloff and distortion at f/8 than at f/16. If you use this lens at f/16 instead of f/8, you will lose about 30% resolution. Error 3: "Lens with TC14 is f/3.5, TC17 is f/4". Yet another example of his total lack of understanding of basic principles. The TC14 takes a stop of light, and the TC17 takes a stop-and-a-half. 1 stop above f/2.8 is f/4, and 1.5 stops is f/4.8.
Focal length		Another dodgy tutorial full of poor grammar and even poorer opinions. Clearly not the work of anyone with any journalistic skills, such as those required of National Geographic director, for example! Error 1: "True fact for you: Prime lenses are much sharper than zooms". Rubbish. While they are often sharper, it is not always the case. For example, the new Nikon 14-24mm zoom is considerably sharper than the 14mm prime. Note to Joey: You don't need to say "true fact". By it's very definition, a 'fact' is 'true'. Error 2: "Primes are sharper because they don't zoom". What a stupid statement. It's like saying a car is faster than a truck because it's a car. The reason why primes are often sharper than zooms is because they are optically simpler designs. There are fewer variables for the lens designer to contend with. That said, a modern well designed zoom is often a match for a prime lens in the same range for sharpness. It depends on the individual lenses involved and a blanket statement either way cannot be made.
Metering		Joey's entire grasp of the Nikon metering systems and their purpose is flawed. For example he mentions that Spot/Center weight may result in overexposure, yet doesn't mention they are just as susceptible to underexposure. It all depends on the scene being metered. He doesn't seem to understand their advantages or purposes. He makes no mention of Matrix metering's 'intelligent' metering of the scene, only that it looks at the whole frame. He also doesn't understand that Centre-Weighted also meters the whole frame. Error 1: "Metering is more accurate in M mode". Completely incorrect. M mode is no more or less accurate than any other mode. Metering values are independent of the mode in use. The difference is that exposure in M mode is a recommendation by the metering system, while in other modes the camera sets exposure automatically based on the metering (although it can be overridden using exposure compensation). Error 2: "Center-Weighted metering measures a large circle". Rubbish. Center weighted metering measures the ENTIRE FRAME, but adds importance to a small circle in the center. Hence the name. Idiot. Don't believe me? Read the Nikon D3 manual.

Want to know just how stupid this guy really is? Take a look at his specifications from the "prototypes given to him by Nikon" of the "D3h" and "D3x" cameras. Forgetting for a moment that anyone receiving prototypes from Nikon would be the subject of a legally binding Non-Disclosure Agreement (NDA), just looking at the specs will give you a chuckle. I've tabulated his claims alongside the known D3 and D700 specifications:

Fake reviews and previews:

Joey's youtube page is choc-full of fake previews of non-existant products. Like the Nikon F7, D3h, D3x, Medium format system, new 70-200 lens (at $2399!!!).....the list goes on. None of these products exist, and many never will. He's never reviewed any of them, because they only exist in his broken mind. Remember, NPS have said that he is not, and never has been a member, and their legal department is investigating him. Rather hard for him to get "NPS prototype equipment" when he's not a member!