The Puns!!!

·        Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.

·        A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

·        Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

·        Shotgun wedding - A case of wife or death.

·        A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

·        Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

·        Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.

·        When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

·        A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.

·        What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead give away.)

·        Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

·        In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.

·        She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.

·        A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

·        If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.

·        With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

·        The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

·        You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

·        Local Area Network in Australia - the LAN down under.

·        Every calendar's days are numbered.

·        A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.

·        A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

·        He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

·        A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.

·        Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

·        Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

·        Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

·        Acupuncture is a jab well done.

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