Hello,

I am a twenty something woman, who has some problems with my sister's kids, they are total brats! To the point of I won't let them in my house without her. They steal, lie, talk back, all kinds of things I wouldn't tolerate, and told her so.

I was spanked as a child although it wasn't very often and I don't remember the individual spankings. But I know that for my case it wouldn't have done any good to ground me. I loved reading, and being by myself, so none of those new age punishments worked on me. I was also a child who loved her parents dearly, and only wanted to please them.

Your site was very informative and well thought out. You presented both sides of the story so to speak, in regards to spanking, and I think that more parents should read this site. There would be a lot less abuse of children and also a lot less bratty kids around. Keep up the good work!
 

Hi!

I happend onto your site after getting to the end of my rope with my 7yr. old daughter. I have two children the 7yr. old and a 11yr old boy. With our son all we needed to do was tell him once maybe twice to do or stop something and he would. Then came our daughter. We had tried time out, grounding, taking things away, you name it. Well, two days ago she cut the dogs hair (for the third time). I had had it. I told her she was going to get a spanking.

I had never said such a thing before. I sent her to her room, and sat in mine saying oh no. I called my husband in and explained to him what transpired. He agreed we needed to do something. So I entered her room, told her what was going to happen, why it was going to happen, and how it was going to happen. Mind you I was never spanked as a child this was all new to me and my husband. I took her over my knee and gave her 7 or 8 good spanks. Enough to have her realize I meant business. Afterwards I held her and we talked. I didn't say I was sorry for what I did, though I was. Afterwards it was not mentioned again. The rest of that day and the following day she has been good as gold.

That's when I stumbled onto your site. I don't agree with some of the things you speak about, but I'm glad that what I did and how I did it were "the right" way. My husband and I as well as our daughter have now worked out a sort of contract with her. As far as what will constitute a spanking and what will be a lesser punishment. We all feel comfortable with this. I hope myself nor my husband ever have to spank again, but at least I feel if it has to be we will be administering it with love and respect.

It feels odd though that I who never received a spanking and honestly never "believed" a child needed one, would now be incorporating this into one of my children's up bringing.

Thank you for making a very difficult decision a little less stressful.

A relieved parent
 

To people who think hitting a child is acceptable,

I was horrified at the information I read on this web page. All it what you want, but hitting a child, spanking a child, paddeling a child, is ABUSE. It should never be done. And to read feedback from other people that actually agree that its ok to hit a child is unbelievable. Anyone advocating spanking should be ashamed. Childern should be loved, not hit.

Sinceryly,
I very upset reader
 

i am a stepdad with 2 stepdaughters 6 and 8. my wife and i both spank. we were already using most of what you suggested. they cooperate with their spankings, so we spank them over the knee, which is what they like. we also give them less super hard spanks since they like to get it over with in less spanks. thanks for your page!
 

I believe that your web site is a brilliant source of information. We have been far too soft in Western Society and as someone who was caned until the age of 17 I know it is a punishment that really does work.

Everyone I know who was caned as school in England changed for the better because they were caned, and although it seems barbaric in todays "politically correct" times one cannot overlook the benefit it gave to remove school bullies and improve social behavior.

My parent allowed me to get away with much too much when I was young but fortunately I went to a strict school in England. When I was 15 I punched a 16 year old girl prefect in the face for trying to take cigarettes from me. I was given 9 very severe strokes of the headmasters cane on the bare bottom and for this reason I have never smoked and have never hit a girl or women since this incidence.

It amazes medical practictioners that I have never smoked thoughout my life but the reason is simply due to the severe caning I recieved. There have been many times when I have wanted to hit my partner but I simply remember the punishment I recieved as a 15 year old and control my feelings. I never told my parents of this very severe punishment but they always knew surreptitiously, as parents often do, that I was properly disciplined and thanked the school for giving me what they should have done.
 

I have just read your web sight in a hope to be more open minded. I truly cannot believe what I have read and there are so many parents that spank their children on a bared bottom. I must say you have covered the topic with incredible detail. Needless to say, I was never spanked. Paddling was the preferred method of discipline in our school district from when I was in elementary to High School. I was very scared in school and was never punished, although once I came close, but got out of it due to my intelligence. I cannot relate to anyone who has been spanked as a child. I have two very well behaved children who would never be able to live in a household such as those described. The reason I am looking into the websights on this topic is because of the widespread lack of respect and obedience of children today. I am appalled at the lack of manners children have today. We trave! l frequently and I must say we (as Americans) are the rudest nation. And why is this? Is spanking a viable solution? All the emails seem to come from loving families with both a mother and a father, but what about all the single parent families? What about the poor and those who lack the ability to get this information so that children will not be slapped and beaten? What do you feel is the best form of education for parents outside of the Internet? Should schools become involved in the parental roles of spanking since so many parents are not involved in their own children's upbringing. Your points are well taken, unfortunately I am a person who could not administer a spanking. Perhaps I need to receive one first. PS If there were any concerns that I would have with your book, I would have to say the ages for spanking. Children of preschool age (under 5) should never be hit. There are so many other ways to get children of that age to act appropriately, unfortunately few parents are willing to take the time. They want the quick fix.
 

i am a 44 years old. my history is so long and full of loss in my life. i have recently had flashbacks of my childhood spankings and have been previously diagnosed with cfids, and bipolar. it turns out that i have ptsd from my childhood. i had a thriving chiropractic practice which i lost. i am currentley on disability and it can all be related to childhood trauma. no matter how one spanks there is anger and violence associated. what about the fear the little child experiences? the repressed feelings? i suggest you read alice millers book, "for your own good". i am a christian, and bought in to the dobson, ezzo, concepts of parenting, how horrible. and if you are a thinking, feeling, compassionate individual and have any influence on this organization...please consider this...read alice millers book.....i would be shocked if you ever raised a hand to a child again.

sincerely,
 

I dont understand how some people, after hearing all the sucess stories from children and grownups that were "spanked with love" can continue to criticize with their left wing liberal views.

I too would like to share a story of my childhood. I was one of five children and we were pretty poor. Since there wasnt much to deprive us from, perhaps the only effective punishment would be to prevent us from going out to play. My parents were very affectionate and found it very awkward to hug and kiss us while we were being punished, besides they felt guilty since we had so much less than every one else. So early on they felt hitting us was the way to go.

We must have all agreed because no one ever complained (unless we thought we took a swat for no reason which wasnt often). We were all spanked when were young (under ten years old) by both parents but my father did most of the hitting as we grew older and it was usually slap on the arm for minor things and a strap to the legs several times for very bad behavior. My mother would say "why dont you take them to their rooms, put them across your lap and spank them." My father would say they are to old for that now. I was the youngest of four boys and although he ocasionaly spanked my younger sister, he and we felt that a man spanking a grown boy was unmasculine and we all agreed. So when I was around thirteen I hadnt been spanked for about three years and none of the previous spankings were especially memerable.

Around that time a friends mother saw me and my cousin smoking and told our mothers. We denied that we smoked, but my mother warned me if she ever caught me she would give me the spanking of my life. I didnt pay her much heed and a few months later during the summer, I would sleep with just my shorts on. One morning just me and my mother were home, I got up went to the kitchen to have breakfast when my mother called me to my room. She was holding my genes over her arm and asked me what was tucked under the reverse folded cuff. It was of course a pack of cigarettes. I stood there dumfounded. She closed the bedroom door and locked it, moved my dress chair to the middle of the room, took me by the ear, grabed my brothers ping pong paddle and walked me to the chair, sat down and put me across her lap.

I was much stronger than her and could have easily broken loose, but I was so shocked and embarassed from being caught that I did not resist. She pulled down my shorts and prceeded to give my completely bared bottom the hardest spanking it ever got. She was in complete control and I was in total submission, saddled across her firm but comfortable lap. It hurt terribly and when she stopped spanking me, as much as I wanted to get up I knew that I had to stay there until she dismissed me.

She gave me a good lecture, but never during this whole ordeal did she raise her voice. I remained across her lap for several minutes sobbing and listening as she softly told me that she love me very much. She pulled up my shorts and let me up and I imediately hugged her and told her that loved her more than anything in the world. She told me that if I ever disobeyed her again, she would spank me the same way. Although I was able to sit down imediately afterwards, my butt stung for a few hours with still a little slight redness when I checked it in a mirror.

I never had to be spanked again and never smoked until years later when she gave me permission. She never told my father or any of my siblings. I know one thing is certain that if my mother ever told me that I needed a spanking after that time, no matter how old I was, I would submit to her. I believe that a father relinqueshes that right when a child reaches puberty, a mother has it forever. Throughout my life I ocassionally met a person, male or female, that would hate their father, but I never met anyone that hated their mother.

With that in mind I prefered that my wife spank our chidren and I only did it ocassionally. However my wifes hands were small as was she and she said that with three young children, that she didnt have the patience take them to their room and spank them the proper way. Therefore she wanted me to spank them when I came home from work. I wanted to hug and kiss my kids when I came home. Besides I went to college at night and was not home every night. So I made her a paddle about 3/8 inches thick, four inches wide, about six inches long and an inch and a half wide handle. That solved the problem. She didnt have to use it to often and I know why, she kiddingly swatted me with it once in a while and it stung.
 

I have only been spanked twice in my life.... they left quite an impression on me. I think that spankings should be used very sparingly. They make much more of an impact then being spanked every couple of weeks or months. The spankings I got weren't very severe, but they were enough that I never forgot them.

Once when I was six years old, my father and I were waiting to cross a busy road and he grasped my hand firmly while we waited for the light to turn red. I don't know what got into me... part of it was defiance. I wanted to show him that I could do what I wanted and he couldn't stop me. Also, I wanted to show that I was a "big girl" and could cross by myself... Anyway, while cars were still coming, I yanked my hand out of his and darted into the street. The cars coming stopped abrubtly (luckily for me) and I made it across safely. The light turned read and my father walked across the street. I could see the anger in his eyes, and I was scared. As soon as he got across he bent me under his arm right there on the sidewalk and walloped me VERY hard 10 times. I was so shocked that I didn't even cry until after it was over. It was my first spanking ever.

The second time was more severe. I was 9 years old and (again, I don't know WHAT got into me) I decided to draw a picture... on the new white and black carpet with a black magic marker. ::Groan::. I drew a small picture, and satisfied with my work, went outside to play and forgot about it. In fact, my parents didn't even notice it for a week! By then I had forgotton all about it. My mother came into the room where I was, dragged me out the the carpet where I drew the picture. She screamed at me for a long time (wouldn't you?) and then began to punish me. I must admit, she came up with a very creative way. She brought me a bucket of warm soapy water and a scrub brush. Then she told me to take off my pants and panties. She had me on all fours, doggie stye. She made me push my bottom high into the air. Then she told me to scrub the drawing. &nb! sp;While I scrubbed it, she smacked my bare bottom over and over again. I had to scrub and scrub to get the marker out.... it must've been over 6 minutes of continuous hand spanks. My bottom looked like an over-ripe tomato when she was done with it. It really left quite and impression on me.... to this day I don't like to see Magic Markers ::wink::.

So anyway, I think spanking is an acceptable punishment.....if done sparingly and properly.
 

I read your site and highly recommend it to anyone who has children. I'm 47 and was raised by my mother and grandmother who believed in spanking. I wish there was this kind of site for them to read then. I remember getting spankings right up till I was 17. I have three brothers and we all recieved bare bottom spankings when warrenitted. When we got older it was more severe like by the strap.
 

Firstly, a very interesting site, I was spanked frequently as a child, and realise now the importance that was given to the position I was requested to adopt.

My Father who was a staunch believer in Corporal Punishment spanked to punish and for no other reason, he always explained why he felt it necessary to spank me which added emphasis to my wrongdoing, a spanking was nothing to be ashamed of he constantly reminded me, that was reserved entirely for the misdeed I had perpetrated.

The OTK position as he sat on a chair was usually favoured, my head would be inches from the floor and his left arm would wrap around my back holding me firmly in position, one of my legs would intertwine with his allowing minimal movement, my two hands had to remain on the floor, and the warning not to move them was always given.

Every spanking ever given was administered to my bared bottom, again this added emphasis to my punishment, in retrospect my father was actually quite puritanical, to be seen Nude was considered "RUDE" in our home, Private parts as we referred to them were exactly that, "private" showers and baths were always taken behind the closed bathroom door.

When a young boy Dad used his palm to spank my bottom, the spanks varied in their number, my bottom had to be seen to be the colour red, and I had to be heard to apologise for whatever misdeed I had perpetrated.

When I entered my teenage years, Dad used a table tennis bat, I was instructed to lay down on my bed on my back, and then raise my two legs upwards pointing towards the ceiling, he would then wrap his arm around my two thighs lifting me slightly higher, both buttocks were then entirely at his disposal, the table tennis bat which was made of pine would then swat each buttock in turn, usually ten swats each, the noise on impact would echo around my bedroom followed by my yelping. Dad was never "lenient" and used the Table tennis bat very effectively, This position enabled him to manoeuvre me in anyway he desired, bend my legs further backwards and my bottom became more accessible, ocassionally he would swat the inner buttocks where the skin is far more tender, he swapped the Table tennis bat for either a plastic ruler or wooden one, my anus being exposed was naturally very embarsssing for me, which again added much emphasis to my punishment.