Dear Portuguese

I am very good. Vote for me and all your problems will disappear. Nothing will be the same. The ‘others’ are all bad-intentioned, corrupt and power-seeking people. Put the cross in the right square. Vote A C T N L B. Cheer at will. Thank you very much.

(Carlos)

Did you know that Swiss cheese has holes in it? And the more cheese you have, the more holes the cheese has. But the more holes it has, the less cheese you have. Can we conclude anything? The more Swiss cheese you buy, the less you have. Damn Swiss cheese!

(Diana and Valter)

Once upon a time in a rainforest there was a fairy. Her wings were made of leaves that grew from her back, and her eyes were so bright that she could never see night. Everywhere she went there was sun, and no one who saw her was ever the same.

*Fransisco Lobo*

I’ve had a very busy day, they say. But I haven’t seen any daylight yet. Should I?

There’s a painting on a wall, they say. But if I can see no wall here, how am I supposed to see a painting?

What if I open my eyes?

(Bruno)

Realizing he’d never be rich, Paul decides to rob a bank. He heads for the bank, but starts having second thoughts. Nevertheless, he doesn’t give up. When he finally crosses the street, a bus hits him. Bottom line: when you are robbing a bank, always look before crossing the street.

(Miguel & Anabela and a little editing by me)

Graça and Joana misunderstood, and thought the stories should be in fifteen words!

A boy fell in the river. I saved him and he is fine now. Fortunately.

They said they needed the ‘fortunately’ to make up the fifteen. Here’s their second story:

Today I ate bad food so a took some medicine and started feeling better. Fortunately.

Yes. Then they went on to more poetic things…

Carrots are orange,

but the oranges

are not carrot.

Eat them both

and be cool!

I think we’d better leave Graça and Joana there. A couple  more 50-word sagas to end…

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Be prepared to receive outside information. Be receptive and listen, watch, and interiorise what comes to you. Remember the motives that keep you alive. Your brain will send you a signal.

Feel your face muscles contracting.

It is done. Congratulations. You have smiled.

Fortunately.

(André and Mariana)

It was January. The class was full of students doing fifty-word compositions. Suddenly, a light came out of the sky. It was a UFO. The UFO kidnapped the teacher, leaving no sign of him behind. That was a sad moment, but at least we all went home earlier. The end.   

(Miguel)