| Buckfast |
| "All the poor men Blessed Robin Hood - Buckfast does the whole world good!" |
| - Buckfast Abbey Benedictine Monks |
| Ah, Buckfast. Nectar of the gods. Yes, buckfast is a well established institution among young drinkers, both under age, and legal (barely). Although the Monks of buckfast abbey prefer slogans such as "Dew on the grass in the early morning", many regular drinkers have come up with a much more accurate slogan ... |
| "Buckfast gets you fucked fast" |
| And indeed this is a very accurate slogan. Buckfast has had a major influence on the increased use of such phrases as "Aw man, I am so fucking wasted." One warning to drinkers of buckfast. Much drinking of this substance in one night may lead to what is known as |
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| The Buckfast Jitters. Although descriptions of it are often vague (as one of the affects of the disease is amnesia.). In mild cases, one may find that they can't stop moving, and feel the need to keep talking. As the disease gets more serious, speech is speeded up very rapidly. In some of the worst cases, the victim may just resort to jibberish. This disease is not to be confused with bad diseases though, as often the victim enjoys these experiences. The Buckfast Jitters is one of the reasons Snarflebarrel exists. It is the only language that can adequately express your feelings of drunkedness. |
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| foolish man trying to discover the secrets of buckfast! Everyone knows, it's the sweat from the monks feet when they squash the grapes! |
| Buckfast has also been responsible for some of the greatest of man's achievements. Many believe that when the beatles wrote songs such as "I am the Walrus" and "Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds" that they were on drugs. This is UNTRUE! As any drinker of buckfast could easily identified, they were drunk, buckfast style. When drunk on buckfast it's very easy to believe you are things you are not. Being a walrus is not even that notable. It's for more odd when you think you are inanimate objects such as strawberries or margaret thatcher. |
| Street drinking used to be a long and laborious task, and only for those who were really dedicated. Now it has been opened up for so many people who may have in the past found this to be unattractive. In the true anarchaic sense, Buckfast has allowed the working man of the street the opportunity to get wasted, by selling a full bottle for only �5! However, Buckfast is not without it's downsides. It has been a major culprit of that "Oh god, what was I doing last night, and why are there hoofprints on the back of my jeans" feeling. It has also been claimed that there may be a link between the consumtion of buckfast, and paedophilia, although it must be stressed that this is currently a rumour. In closing, This page is our tribute to the joys of Buckfast, and we hope that the benedictine monks will continue making this fine wine for years to come. Remember, Buckfast is the stuff AAWWW YEEEH'S are made of ... |