| Cheese Cutter's Creed (Farty McSmellsalot) Something is bubbling away down inside A rumble, a shake, There's nowhere to hide. Squirming and wriggling around on my chair, Backwards and forwards, There's no use in trying I can't save the air. I let one slip out, Very quiet and slow, No one suspects No one can know, Oh joy to the world! I've let a silent one go! Quietly pleased with my mischievous deed, A smile and a nod, Is the cheese cutter's creed! A moment thereafter something tickled my nose, A sniff and a gag, What a foul smell arose. Someone beside me is all that I need, A neighbour to blame Is the cheese cutter's creed! No one near, damn, feck and buggary shit, What to do? Hold, wait, thats...thats it! Lift up your foot, Then the other one too, They'll never suspect, They'll not have a clue, Oh how unfortunate, you've stepped in dog poo! Farting discreetly, there's only one way to suceed, Take note and have a butcher's at the cheese cutter's creed! |