Firstly I feel i should apologise to the current assault on your ear- drums in the form of Bon Jovi! Although better than the original version this midi file has no right to be inflcited upon the world anymore than Timmy Mallet had the right to hit anyone over the head with a rubber mallet. If the world was a fair place, what would actually have happened would have been:
1. Mr Mallet taken out the back of a a gay bar
2. Accosted by some rugged bikers while wearing that fucking yellow polka dot bikini he was so fond of
3. For the finale his balls crushed with a hammer similar to that of the mighty norse god Thor.
I fear I have gone off the point somewhat, and I fear that any visitors to this site with anything resembling a taste in music have now died in an uncerimonious head explosion. I especially apologise if these people had been enjoying a wank immediately prior to this.
I would like to quench any rumours that BJ as he is so fondly called by his pink army is not actually satan incarnate, no...hes simply his son originally to be called Damien Bon Jovi but then Sam Neil went and blew Jons fathers cover...the blighter!
Bon Jovi is responsible for such cock rock attorcities as "living on a prayer", "You give love a bad name" and keeping up to his repuation the recently dire "It's my life" All these songs have the same essecntial problems:
1. They are shite
2. BJ sings them
3. BJ rants on about looovvvveeeeee and the like
4. Hes a gimp
5. They are shite
Throughout his life BJ has proven to be more homosexually active than the grand old duke of york. This is the same grand old duke of york who was famously so homosexual that he had to be put down by the homosexual community for spreading a reputation that homosexuals are extremely promiscuous...and to a lesser extent the spread of the AIDS virus.
On a recent discussion about civilisations Mr Jovi talked about his love for the Roman empire and how he wishes society was like this today. This is due to the way in which the more powerful a Roman was the more young boys they had at their disposal. These young boys would provide any number of menial tasks such as anal penetration, blow jobs not to mention the daily rite of humping a goat for Mr Jovis sick pleasure. It has been said that BJ has spent up to 79 hours at a time watching young boys hump goats.
No fuckin way, Bon Jovi is a paedophile of the highest calibre, and is primarily responsible for framing Gary Glitter as he is jealous of his hair...Its a fuckin wig Jovi you tit!!