WARNING: This fic is pure waff. Please do not attempt to read if you have a weak stomach, are holding sharp objects, or are operating heavy machinery. I will not be held responsible for any illness/injuries sustained. ^_~ **Disclaimers and glossary of Japanese terms are located at end of story. Enjoy! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Hello" by Stormlight (Riverfell_Den@hotmail.com) Rated PG13 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I've been alone with you inside my mind, and in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Why am I doing this?" Tsukino Usagi muttered as she walked slowly down the long, plush-carpeted hallway that would ultimately lead her to the door of her worst enemy. "What conceivable good could POSSIBLY come from me doing this?" She sighed and walked even slower, wondering how she had ever managed to talk herself into going to Chiba Mamoru's apartment in the first place. All he would do was laugh at her; she knew this as well as she knew her own name...but she just couldn't take it anymore! She had to tell him how she really felt, before she went crazy. She had to tell him that she was in love with him. She supposed she owed it to him, after all. He'd spent the last week attempting to cheer her up, seeing how depressed she'd been lately. Before then, she wouldn't have even CONSIDERED telling him! She'd been content to keep her dreams to herself, simply imagining what it would be like to be held close in his arms and to feel his soft lips against her hair. It was his absolute kindness toward her lately that had made her gather her courage, had made her believe that maybe...just maybe...her dreams weren't hopeless, after all. That there was something more than a tenuous friendship behind that cool smile, those deep blue eyes. He'd even stopped calling her "Odango Atama", she thought with a sad smile. She guessed that he thought it would make her feel better, since she loathed the name so much. How could she possibly tell him that she MISSED that name? Because even though it was obnoxious and insulting...it was still HER name. The one he'd made up just for her. He didn't have pet names for anyone else, after all. Just her. And it made her feel...special. But she hadn't told him that before, because then he'd KNOW. He would figure out how she really felt about him, and her life would end. **Not that it really matters now,** she reminded herself sourly. She was about to dig her own grave by going to his apartment. She wondered if she should've brought a shovel with her, because after this she knew she was going to want the ground to open up and swallow her, and she was sure that Mamoru would be quite willing to put the dirt back into the hole afterwards. She sighed mournfully. Why did love have to be so HARD? And there was his door. Number 1230, last door on the right at the end of the hall, the furthest away from the elevator. She supposed that was a good thing, actually. That way she wouldn't be quite so tempted to chicken out at the last second and hightail it out of there, at least not without him seeing her when he opened the door. She took a deep breath and held it for as long as possible, then released it. "I am Sailor Moon," she reminded herself. "I am powerful and strong. I have fought hell, itself. I can face Mamoru, and I can tell him how I feel." She lifted a trembling hand, and pressed the doorbell. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I sometimes see you pass outside my door. Hello, is it me you're looking for? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mamoru had just lathered his hair with shampoo when he thought he heard the doorbell ring. He paused, soap dripping down his face, wondering if he was hearing things. He wasn't EXPECTING any company, but sometimes Furuhata Motoki, his best friend, liked to drop by unannounced. Although HE usually never bothered with things like protocol, usually letting himself in. Unless the door was locked. There it was again. Definitely the doorbell. Grumbling about lousy timing, Mamoru ducked his head beneath the hot spray and rinsed the soap out of his hair as quickly as he could. Turning off the water, he stepped out of the shower and looked around for his robe. He scowled when he realized that it was still hanging on his closet door in his bedroom. The doorbell sounded a third time. "All right! I'm coming!" he yelled. "Keep your shirt on!" Snatching a towel from the rack, he wrapped it around his trim waist and tucked the ends in tightly as he headed for the door. "Can't a guy take a shower without being interrupted...?" he muttered as he peered through the peek-hole in the door, fully expecting to see his friend standing outside. There was nobody there. He frowned as he yanked open the door, sticking his head outside quickly and looking down the hallway just in time to see a familiar, Odango-headed figure disappear into the elevator, golden hair floating behind her. He blinked in surprise. "Usagi-chan?" he called out, hoping she'd hear him. But the sound of the doors sliding close was his only response. Frowning in confusion, and a little concerned-what on earth could have possessed Usagi to come see HIM of all people?-he closed the door and went back to his room, deep in thought. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I can see it in your eyes. I can see it in your smile. You're all I ever wanted, and my arms are open wide. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "It's for the best," she told herself as she leaned against the wall in the elevator. She had just saved herself some major embarrassment. If he'd been home, she would've had to tell him everything, and he'd be howling with laughter by the time she left. **Or worse,** a nasty little corner of her mind whispered. **He'd probably never speak to you again if he thought he was leading you on. He wouldn't want to give you the wrong impression, so he'd avoid you completely.** That thought was enough to make the tears start to Usagi's eyes. Because she knew the nasty little voice-her common sense-was right. She was hardly past being a kid, after all, and she was honest enough to admit that she was still a little immature, crying over the least little thing and being loudmouthed and obnoxious...the complete opposite of Mamoru (well, the loudmouthed part, anyway...). And he was a popular college student who had his own place and everything. He could have any woman he wanted; SHE'D seen the way girls looked at him, and had no doubt that any number of them would do anything for him to even notice them. The only reason he was being so nice to her was because he'd noticed how sad she'd been lately, and wanted to cheer her up. The same way Motoki-onii-san did, who saw her only as a kid sister. Usagi sniffled and wiped at her eyes, wanting more than anything for things to be the way they had once been, when he had simply been "Mamoru-baka" instead of "Mamo-chan", her own special pet name that she'd come up with, but had never dared to voice. It hadn't been that long, really, since she'd discovered that her total dislike of the arrogant young man was actually the complete opposite. Oh sure, she had always known that he was attractive...okay, so he was downright gorgeous!...but, as Hino Rei, one of her best friends (and fellow Senshi), often said, "Pretty face equals empty mind." Of course...she was usually referring to Yuuchirou, the young wanna-be musician who lived and worked at the shrine (and drove Rei absolutely nuts), but up until then Usagi had always held that to be true in regards to Chiba Mamoru, as well. In addition to his stone-cold heart and an ego the size of the moon... The elevator dinged as the door slid open on the ground floor, and Usagi stepped out and made her way to the entrance, not really paying attention to where she was going. Her thoughts were still turned inward, to the first time she had realized that she truly loved Chiba Mamoru. The trouble started two weeks ago. She'd been walking in the park with her friends when a loud wail caught her attention. She turned to see a little boy of maybe five years old sitting on a bench in the playground, holding an empty, dripping ice cream cone in his hand, with the actual ice cream melting at his feet. The boy's mother was a little way off, deep in conversation with another woman, and didn't appear to notice the problem. "Awww... poor little kid," Usagi exclaimed. "I'm gonna go cheer him up!" The Senshi looked at each other and rolled their eyes, grinning; they knew what a sucker Usagi was for little kids in distress. "He'll be okay," Rei replied impatiently, just for the sake of argument. "We have a meeting, remember?" "Yeah, yeah, but the Senshi help ALL those in distress! It's our sworn duty!" Usagi said dramatically as she skipped toward the boy. Before she reached him, though, she noticed with a mix of dismay and surprise that Chiba Mamoru was also approaching the kid, holding an ice cream cone of his own. She paused, not wanting him to see her and thus start tormenting her again. Luckily he didn't appear to notice her presence. "Douka shita no?" Mamoru asked as he stopped before the boy, who looked up at him through big, blue, teary eyes and pointed dejectedly at the ice cream melting at his feet. "Awww...that's some rotten luck, isn't it?" Mamoru added sympathetically. The boy sniffled and nodded his head, looking down shyly at his feet. Mamoru took a seat on the bench beside him, his eyes filled with a kindness that Usagi had never seen before. Intrigued, she crept closer to them, hiding behind a tree and peeking out. "Well, you know what?" Mamoru continued, speaking in a low, gentle voice. "I kind of have a problem, too." Sniffling, the boy turned wide eyes upward. "You do?" he asked shyly. "Hai," Mamoru replied, smiling a little. "But maybe you can help me with it." The little boy's eyes widened even more. "I can?" "Sure! See, I just bought this chocolate ice cream cone, and I just realized...that I'm not even hungry!" Mamoru scratched his head, his expression comical. "I sure hate to waste such a delicious cone," he confided. "But there's so much ice cream I don't think I can eat it all." He turned serious eyes to the boy, who was waiting with breathless anticipation. "Do you think," he continued seriously, "that you would like to share it with me?" He might as well have been offered a gift of Ambrosia, so awestruck did the little boy look as he nodded his head. Mamoru smiled and carefully slid the top scoop of ice cream onto the boy's empty cone, making sure it stayed there. "There," he said, grinning boyishly at the child. "Now both of our problems are solved. Eat it carefully now so it doesn't fall off." "Arigatou," the little boy said happily as he grinned up at the tall man. Mamoru grinned back and ruffled the silky hair on the child's head, before rising to his feet and walking off, toward Usagi's hiding place. Usagi bit back a gasp and attempted to push herself into the tree, heart pounding. If he caught her spying on him, he'd never let her live it down! She curled up at the base of the tree and prayed that he'd walk past without noticing her, squeezing her eyes shut as though that would help make her invisible. After a moment, she felt a shadow fall over her, and slowly opened her eyes. She gave a little squeak when she saw a pair of legs standing in front of her, and slowly raised her eyes to meet Mamoru's amused gaze. "I...I...uh..." she stammered, scrambling to her feet while her cheeks flamed. "I was going to help that boy...and then you got there first... and I...um...I just..." She stuttered to a halt when he didn't say anything; merely looked at her with that same look he'd given the boy. The one filled with kindness, that made her heart pound crazily in her throat. With a small smile, he held out his hand-the one clutching the ice cream cone-to her. She blinked, her eyes settling on his face in confusion. He still didn't say anything, merely regarded her with that deep gaze. She slowly reached out toward him, then hesitated, looking up at him suspiciously, expecting a trick. He sighed and shook his head a little, his smile widening slightly as he took her hand in his free one and put the cone there forcefully, closing her fingers around it gently. He gave her the slightest wink, his eyes twinkling, before whispering softly, "do Itashimashite." Then, as she continued to stand there gaping at him, he turned and walked casually away, hands shoved into his pockets. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 'Cause you know just what to say, and you know just what to do, and I want to tell you so much I love you. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ She hadn't fallen in love with him in that exact moment, she thought as she walked at an uncharacteristically slow pace toward home. It had taken her a few more days before she realized that she really LOVED him, but in those days, her eyes were opened more and more to the true Mamoru. He was so kind, to everyone. Well, except for her, that is. He didn't stop teasing her after that one special moment in the park, but for some reason, he was teasing her less and less. He was starting to act as though he was walking on eggshells around her, as well, and it made her nervous, as well as curious. She made it a point to watch him as much as possible, to study his behavior, and as she did, she discovered something surprising. Chiba Mamoru was lonely. Oh, sure, he had his friends, but he was still quiet and withdrawn. Except when he was with Motoki. Then he seemed to open up a little more, laughing and joking around. But when he was by himself, Usagi could almost SEE the walls he built around himself, to keep people out. She didn't understand why he would do that. Why would anyone want to deliberately keep people at arm's length? It made no sense to her; she thought she'd wither and die without her friends around her, especially during those moments when the whole world seemed to be against her. Her only conclusion-and it was more accurate than she would ever guess-was that, somehow and somewhere, Mamoru had been deeply and seriously hurt, and those walls were the only protection he had against being hurt like that again. She questioned Motoki a couple of times, bringing up the subject cautiously. She wanted to know more about Mamoru, because the more she studied him the more she realized that she didn't know ANYTHING about him. But Motoki would give her a strange look whenever she asked about the dark-haired man, and she'd lose her nerve and change the subject. But she found herself wanting, more than anything, to tear down those walls Mamoru built around himself and let the sunlight in, to take him into HER arms and hold him until he let go of whatever darkness was haunting him. She knew she could do it, if he'd give her a chance. And that was the problem. He would never give her the chance. He was too good at hiding to let himself be caught. And why would he want HER, anyway? Usagi sighed as she walked down the sidewalk. The arcade was ahead, and she wondered absently if Motoki was working that shift. He was, and he looked up as she paused outside the window, looking in. A brief frown touched his face, and then he lifted a hand and waved her inside. Uh-oh. SHE knew that look. He had sensed something was wrong, and now he was going to pry an explanation out of her. She considered pretending to misunderstand and simply wave back while making an escape...but she could never be that rude to him. With a defeated sigh, she walked into the arcade and sat on a stool at the counter. "Konnichi-wa, Motoki-onii-san," she greeted, forcing a smile. "Douka shita no, Usagi-chan?" he asked bluntly, always one to get straight to the point. "You look like you lost your best friend." She smiled faintly. "Something like that," she replied. Then, looking up with a slight gleam of hope in her eyes, "Has Mamo-ch...uh...Mamoru-san been in here today?" "Nani?" He looked faintly surprised at the question. She didn't really blame him. It wasn't an ordinary question, after all. "Iie," he replied. "Naze, are you looking for him?" "Eh...well, not really. I was just wondering if he was here," she replied, blushing faintly and refusing to meet his gaze. "Does this have anything to do with why you've been so depressed for the past couple of weeks? You've been watching Mamoru-san a great deal, haven't you?" Usagi blinked, staring at Motoki in surprise. "N-nani?" she squeaked. "Was I really that obvious about it?" He nodded, smiling kindly. "To me, anyway. I don't think Mamoru noticed, though," he replied with gentle amusement. She huffed a sigh, looking annoyed. "Why doesn't THAT surprise me?" she grumbled, propping her chin in her hands. "The only time he knows I exist is when he feels like picking on someone. And lately he hasn't even been doing THAT!" "He's been worried about you, Usagi-chan," Motoki told her gently, watching as she blinked again. "We've all noticed that you haven't been yourself lately, but he thinks maybe he did something to cause you to be so depressed, which is why he hasn't called you names or teased you." Usagi looked away; he was right about being the cause of her depression, although not for the reason he thought. "It isn't really his fault," she murmured, almost to herself. "He isn't responsible for the way I feel..." "The way you feel?" Motoki realized instantly that he had hit on something big, but Usagi did not look like she was going to confess easily. Still, he wasn't about to give up. "Come on, Usagi-chan," he pressed. "Tell me what's wrong. I swear I won't tell a single soul!" She seemed to hesitate, and he added, "Sometimes, talking about your problem can help you find a solution to that problem." She sighed and lowered her head. "It's...Mamoru," she admitted in a soft voice. "I...something happened that changed my whole perspective of him. I've been watching him, and all of a sudden he's this completely different person. Someone that I...care about. A lot." She raised her head, and Motoki was shocked to see tears in her eyes. "I think I love him, Motoki-san," she whispered, her voice choked, "and I know that he's been concerned about me, 'cause he hasn't even been calling me Odango Atama anymore and I...I miss it. I feel bad for making him worry, so I...I went to his apartment today, and I was going to tell him how I felt..." Motoki was really surprised, and more than a little gratified. He'd been suspecting something like this was going on for a long time. "And what was his reaction?" he pressed. She shrugged. "He wasn't home. Nobody answered the door. So I left." "Well, you can go again tomorrow," Motoki began, but she cut him off with a shake of her head. "I don't think I'll be able to go there again. I just don't think...that I want to risk losing him completely just to confess a silly little crush to him," she replied sadly. "Usagi-chan, love is NOT a 'silly little crush'," he told her firmly. "To Mamoru it probably will seem that way. I mean...I'm just a kid to him," she replied. "Chigau." In his intent to convince her, he gripped her hands in his own. "Usagi, I don't know about you, but if somebody came to me to tell me that they loved me...I'd be flattered beyond words! Even if he doesn't return your feelings..." He ignored her wince. "...at least he'll know, and I think he would feel pretty special to know that someone as special as you loved him. He doesn't have a lot of love in his life, you know. He doesn't make friends easily, and he's fiercely devoted to the friends he does have. I tell you, if you told him how you felt, I think you'd make him very happy." "Demo...what if he only laughs at me, or...or tells me to stay away from him?" she whispered, her cheeks pale. "He wouldn't do that. He isn't that heartless, Usagi-chan," Motoki replied. "Onegai, Usagi, believe me. Mamoru is my best friend. I think if you go back to his apartment and tell him how you feel, you'll make him happy. At the very least, he'll know what's been bothering you so much. Why not go right now? He's bound to be home by now," he urged. Usagi hesitated, then slowly nodded as she slid off the stool. "Wakatta. A-arigatou, Motoki-san," she whispered. "You were right; talking did help a little. I guess I'll see you later." She seemed to gather her will about her. Then, with chin held high, she marched out of the arcade and back to Chiba Mamoru's apartment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I long to see the sunlight in your hair, and tell you time and time again how much I care. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~Meanwhile~~ Mamoru paced the length of his apartment, deep in thought. He knew he was supposed to be studying for the exams in a few days, but he just couldn't seem to concentrate. His mind's eye kept seeing the flash of golden hair vanishing into the elevator. What had Usagi come to see him about? He frowned as he paced out to his balcony, leaning against the wall and staring blindly out over the city. He was certain it was important; he knew nothing short of a national disaster could force his little Odango Atama to come see him otherwise. **I wonder if it has anything to do with why she's been so unhappy lately,** he thought. He wasn't entirely sure, but he had the feeling that he was somehow mixed up in all of this, although he had no idea what he could have done to make her so miserable. He'd TRIED to cheer her up. He hadn't teased or insulted her for at least a week (no easy task to accomplish on his part), and by all sense and logic that SHOULD have been enough to bring the bright, happy Usagi-chan back into being. But instead, his actions only seemed to make things worse...and it was driving him insane with worry. In all honesty...to see her hurting like that made HIM hurt, as well, as much as it pained him to admit it. He liked Usagi. In fact, he liked her a LOT. Maybe even a little TOO much, which was why he was always trying so hard to push her away. The last thing he wanted was to get into any uncomfortable situations. He was a college student, after all, and she wasn't even out of middle school yet. They were as opposite as night and day. He was solemn and quiet and took himself and his studies very seriously. She was...well...the term "air-head", no matter how cruel it sounded, fit very well with the image of Usagi in his mind. She was as flighty as a butterfly (**And twice as beautiful,** a little corner of his mind chortled gleefully). Besides, what would people think if they ever found out that cool, suave, always-in-control Chiba Mamoru was hooked on a fourteen-year-old girl? His reputation would be ruined for life. Not to mention he could get into a LOT of trouble... Still...none of this kept him from caring for her. It didn't keep his heart from pounding in his ears whenever she skipped into him on the street. It didn't keep him from wanting to take her into his arms and soothe her even as his cutting insults killed the light in her eyes; or run his fingers through that soft hair while whispering gentle apologies into her ear... Mamoru drew in a shaky breath, then groaned softly and pounded his fist against the wall, shaking his head to clear it. **Kuso!** he snarled silently. **Listen to yourself! You're starting to act like some lovesick schoolboy! Don't even THINK about her like that! DON'T!** Maybe the only way to not think about her was to avoid her. Avoid the arcade, take a different route to and from school or work, make sure that when she was in one place he was in another...like the other side of the city, perhaps. Since trying to be nice to her didn't appear to be cheering her up, maybe she'd be happier if he simply disappeared altogether. It would certainly make HIM a hell of a lot happier if he didn't have to look into those sad blue eyes and know that somehow HE was the reason they had lost their sparkle. "She'll be okay. She'll be fine! It's probably just hormones or something." he told himself firmly, not liking the guilt that insisted on making itself at home in his heart. What did HE have to be guilty of? He hadn't done anything! Probably she was just mad because she was being punished for failing yet another test or something. Once the punishment was over, she'd be back to normal, and then maybe everything else would go back to normal, as well. He nodded decisively, smiling a little. That's right. His Odango was just having a bout of teenage angst, perfectly natural for someone her age. In a few more days it would pass, and everything would be normal again. It was nothing for him to worry about and obsess over. Nothing at all. So...then...why had Usagi come to his apartment? He groaned and fought the urge to beat his head against the wall. And he was back to square one... "Okay, this is getting ridiculous," he muttered through clenched teeth. "It's gonna drive me crazy if I can't get an answer soon! I have an exam in TWO DAYS, and I can't even remember what the topic is that I'm supposed to be studying!" He shook his head wryly. "All this agonizing over one little girl? I must be losing my touch..." Well...only one thing to do then. He abruptly turned on his heel and marched into the apartment. He pulled out an address book, flipped pages until he found what he was looking for. Usagi's address. He'd confiscated it from Motoki a few weeks back, when he'd first realized the direction his feelings were taking him. He didn't know then WHY he felt it was so important to have the address-just assumed that maybe he'd need it one day-and now he was glad he'd gotten it, even if it was at the cost of putting up with Motoki's teasing comments. Right now, past what HE was feeling, the most important thing was what SHE was feeling. Something was hurting his Odango, and if that something was him he wanted-no, he NEEDED-to find out what he could do to end it. Or he'd never be able to get down to his studying. He'd go over to her house to her house and shake the truth out of her if he had to, but he was gonna put a stop to this ridiculous behavior of her if it killed him! He headed out the door, in such a state of befuddlement that he didn't even realize he had neglected to turn off his radio. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sometimes I feel my heart will overflow. Hello, I've just got to let you know ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twenty minutes and a bus ride later, Mamoru stood before the door of Usagi's house, trying to steady his frazzled nerves. What in the world was he going to say if her father opened the door? He'd heard stories about her father... **Well, only one way to find out,** he told himself, and raised his hand to knock firmly. A moment later, the door jerked open...and a ten-year-old boy looked up at him suspiciously. "Who're you?" he asked pointedly. Mamoru blinked, before remembering that Usagi had a younger brother. Shingo was his name, wasn't it? "Eh...is Usagi-chan home?" he asked, attempting a friendly smile. "Iie." Oh. He blinked again. "Well...do you know when she'll be home?" he asked. Shingo's face took on a defensive expression as he gave Mamoru the once-over. "Who wants to know?" he asked snidely. Despite himself, Mamoru almost smiled. No wonder Usagi complained about this kid so much. "Chiba Mamoru wants to know, that's who," he replied dryly. Instantly, Shingo's entire demeanor changed. His jaw dropped and his eyes widened. "YOU'RE Chiba Mamoru?" he asked. "THE Chiba Mamoru?" He snickered. "Oh, this is too good. Boy, I wish Usagi-baka was home so I could see the expression on her face when she sees YOU!" He was practically rubbing his hands together with glee. "I'll be sure to let her know you dropped by though," he added with an evil grin. Mamoru rolled his eyes, smiling a little. Apparently Usagi had been telling stories... "You do that. In the meantime, do you have any idea where she could be?" he asked. "Are you gonna go make fun of her some more?" Shingo asked hopefully. Mamoru opened his mouth to reply that of course he wasn't, but then he hesitated. With a noncommittal shrug, he asked, "So where is she?" Shingo seemed to be weighing his response, then gave a careless shrug. "Probably the arcade blowing her allowance... as usual," he replied. "I gotta get back to my game. I'm kicking some serious youma butt over there. Give Usagi-baka one from me, k? Ja!" And the door shut in Mamoru's face. Mamoru stood there for a moment, blinking, before allowing himself the liberty of a short laugh and turning away from the door. The arcade. Of course HE should have thought of that! He smiled grimly and shook his head. That Odango certainly had rattled his nerves. His smile widened, became amused, as he glanced back at the house. So that was Usagi's brother. He released another small chuckle. **No wonder she complains. If that's how all younger siblings act, I suppose I can be glad I don't have any,** he thought. * * * * * "Hey, Motoki-san!" Mamoru panted as he hurried into the arcade. "Is Usagi-chan in here?" Motoki looked up from serving coffee to a customer, and his jaw nearly dropped when he took in his normally immaculate best friend's extremely disheveled state. "Mamoru-san?" he choked through a laugh. "What happened to YOU?! You look like you just got through running a marathon!" "Well, considering I ran the whole way from Usagi's house to here, that isn't far off," came the reply. "So is she here?" Motoki ignored the question to address the first statement. "Why were you at Usagi-chan's house?" he asked, eyes narrowing suspiciously. "Well...she had come to my apartment earlier but I was in the shower so I didn't get to the door right away. I saw her heading into the elevator. It's been bugging me all afternoon, wondering what she was there for, so I thought I'd go to her place and pry the answer out of her," Mamoru explained sourly. "I have an exam to study for, after all. I won't get anything done if this keeps distracting me." "NANI?! You mean you WERE home?!" Motoki yelped, almost dropping the coffee pot he still held. Quickly, he set it back onto its holder and leaned closer to address Mamoru. "She came in here all upset 'cause she didn't think you were home," he confided, a grin tugging at his mouth. "She had something pretty important she wanted to talk to you about." "You mean she IS here?" Mamoru asked. "Iie, she left about fifteen minutes ago," Motoki replied, his mind turning cartwheels. If he was right about this... "So what did you want to see HER about?" he asked innocently. Mamoru cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I was just...gonna ask why she seemed so upset lately, and what I could do to help her feel better," he muttered. "What did Usagi want to talk about? Did she say?" Motoki smiled mysteriously. "Oh...she gave me a few hints. Trust me. I think you'll really like what she wants to tell you." "Oh? And how would you know that?" Motoki shrugged. "Well...I know that if some girl like Usagi was going out of her way to tell me that she was in love with me, I'd be beyond thrilled," he replied carelessly, lips twitching. Mamoru stilled. "Usagi...is trying to tell me...what?" he asked slowly as his heart began to pound in his ears. Motoki grinned widely. "You heard me," he replied, crossing his arms. "Why do you think she's been so unhappy lately? Wouldn't you feel that way if you were sure that the object of your love didn't return your affection?" Mamoru's mouth opened and closed several times, but no sound came out. If his mind was whirling before, it was turning cartwheels now. **U-Usagi is in LOVE with me? She loves...ME?!** seemed to be the extent of his thoughts, while his heart danced a mad little jig inside his chest. If hearts could speak, this one would no doubt be screaming its joy to the world. Mamoru's logic, of course, immediately grabbed a megaphone and-shoving Heart aside rather rudely-started reminding Mamoru quite forcefully of all the reasons why Usagi's love was a BAD thing. It was used to being obeyed unconditionally, after all, and it wasn't about to be stopped now by a little twit of a girl. But Heart was bound and determined to have its way this time. It had been bullied, trampled on, shoved aside, and beaten into submission by Logic one too many times, and it was PISSED OFF. And so, before Logic could get out more than three words, it abruptly found itself being gagged, hog-tied, and shoved head-first into a corner of Mamoru's mind. It lay there with little swirls in its eyes, dazed and more than a little stunned that Heart, for once, actually had the guts to DO something...and conceded that it had just been replaced as master of the house. Heart-looking grimly satisfied with itself-brushed its hands, smiled guilefully, and moved to take its rightful place on the throne. Motoki, in the meantime, was feeling quite pleased with himself. He would have given his left arm for a camera right then, because the poleaxed expression on Mamoru's face was absolutely priceless. "Well, Mamoru-san? You said you wanted to help her. Any ideas on how you're gonna do that?" he asked slyly. Mamoru's dazed expression abruptly sharpened, focused, as though he'd just come to the end of some inner struggle, and he shot his friend a harried look. "Excuse me," he muttered. "I have something to do." He leaped from his stool and headed for the exit. "Mamoru-san," the manager called out, waiting until he turned to look back. "Maybe you'd better hurry to get home. It's quite possible you're gonna have a visitor, and you wouldn't want to disappoint her...AGAIN." And he gave Mamoru an exaggerated wink. Mamoru was anything but stupid, and THAT wink was enough for even a dimwit to get the point. He didn't answer, and he didn't bother to try to hide the wide grin, either, that spread across his face as he nearly bolted out the door of the arcade. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 'Cause I wonder where you are, and I wonder what you do. Are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you? Tell me how to win your heart, for I haven't got a clue. But let me start by saying I love you. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Usagi walked despondently out of Mamoru's apartment building for the second time that afternoon. She had rung the doorbell and pounded the door and even had tried the doorknob to see if it was unlocked-although she had no idea how she would've explained to Mamoru why she had broken into his apartment-but again, nobody had answered. She could think of only two reasons as to why this might be. Either he really was away...or he was home, and he knew it was her and was deliberately not answering his door. She wanted desperately to believe that it was the former rather than the latter...but she was certain that she'd heard low voices coming from inside his apartment. **Maybe he has a date,** she thought suddenly, and couldn't stop the flood of tears from filling her eyes at that thought. Forget what Motoki had told her; she was now immensely glad she hadn't told her Mamo-chan her true feelings. It would have ruined everything for sure. The sun had nearly set, and the park was dark and shadowed, street lights flickering on one by one to light the main walking paths. She frowned and shivered, not liking the creepy feeling of being alone in the park after sunset. It was a pretty safe place, actually; there were often police checking the grounds to make sure troublemakers stayed away, but nevertheless, she might get in trouble herself if one of them caught her wandering alone after hours, since the park WAS supposed to be closed now. She didn't relish the thought of being taken to her house in a police car and having to explain where she'd been to her overprotective parents... although no doubt that little baka of a brother would have a holiday watching her get yelled at... She sniffed again and swiped at her eyes, which continued to leak tears, making the path difficult to follow. All she could really see were blurs of light and shadow. And her eyes burned, too, from all the crying. She rubbed them again, irritably, trying to convince herself that Chiba Mamoru wasn't worth sore eyes and a headache. Well, she didn't convince herself of anything, but at the very least she finally managed to rub the last of the tears away... She didn't see the person hurrying in the other direction, head bowed, until they had run into each other. Usagi gasped, stumbling back, barely managing to keep her balance, and stuttered an apology while her mind screamed, **NOW you're in for it! You just ran into a cop and he'll be mad at you for being out after the park closed! Baka, baka, baka!** "G-gomen," she stammered. "I know I'm not supposed to be here, but I'm going home, honest! Don't arrest me," she whimpered. The deep, warm chuckle that greeted her was enough to make her heart stop, as did the gentle reply, "I wouldn't dream of arresting you, Odango." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hello, is it me you're looking for? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Usagi's eyes opened wide as she slowly let her gaze travel upward, hardly daring to believe that it was he who stood before her. When she reached his face she stopped, and suddenly found herself locked within a cerulean gaze as dark as midnight and as deep and mysterious as the ocean. He stood bathed in the golden glow of a street lamp, his hair catching the pale light and reflecting it back again until it almost looked like he was wearing a halo. He was...beautiful. "Mamo-chan..." she breathed, backing away. His lips curved upward in a tender smile as her soft voice reached him; she didn't seem to realize what she'd said. She was quite unaware of her own halo that the light cast upon her hair, but he certainly wasn't, and it was driving him beyond insanity to keep from burying his fingers in the silken strands. What he was seeing in her eyes definitely was not helping him to stay in control. "Hello, Usa-chan," he replied softly, a finger reaching up to stroke along her face, the only liberty he dared allow himself. "I heard you've been looking for me..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 'Cause I wonder where you are, and I wonder what you do. Are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Usagi blinked, abruptly coming back to her senses, and stepped back, ripping her gaze away from his before he could read too deeply into her soul. "I...uh...I was," she stammered. "I wanted to tell you something, but it...it really isn't important..." **Not important?** Mamoru's eyebrows shot up. **After what Motoki just told me? Oh no, Usagi-chan. My Usako. You're not getting out of this THAT easily...** After all that worrying over the powerful emotions he held in regards to this small slip of a girl, after trying so hard to unsuccessfully trample them into the dirt, and then finding out that she was dealing with those very same feelings... Well, he wasn't about to leave until he got this whole mess worked out. For once, his heart was in control, and right now he was more than willing to listen to whatever it told him to do. "Well, somehow I think it has to be somewhat important," he told her carefully. "Otherwise why go to my apartment...twice...in order to tell me?" She flinched. "How did you...never mind." Her voice was suddenly flat. "How come you aren't home, anyway? I heard voices from inside. I figured you must have had a date or something." No matter how hard she tried, she could not hide the twinge of jealousy that colored her words, and inwardly Mamoru rejoiced when he heard it. "I guess I left my radio on," he replied calmly. "I've been out looking for you all afternoon, actually. I saw you leaving the first time you came." "You were home?" She looked surprised. "How come...how come you didn't go after me if you were so curious?" "Ah..." He grinned, shooting her a sly look. "I was kind of in the shower when you came, and when I answered the door I was only wearing a towel at the moment so I couldn't very well take off after you..." Usagi blinked, and then her cheeks flamed as the implications hit her, just as he'd known they would. If she'd stayed a moment longer, she would have seen Mamoru in only a towel? She let out an embarrassed giggle and scratched her head. "Well...I guess it's a good thing I gave up and left then," she replied, somewhat nervously, trying to ignore the funny feeling in her stomach. She also tried to ignore the disappointment she felt at missing such a spectacle. "Anyway," Mamoru continued, determined to get back to the subject at hand. "You found me now, so you might as well tell me what you wanted." She gulped and seemed to shrink a little. "I-it really wasn't that important," she muttered. "Nothing that can't wait, anyway..." "Motoki didn't seem to believe that," Mamoru replied softly. "He had quite a bit to say on the subject, in fact." Usagi froze. "He...t-told you?" Her voice was barely above a whisper. "I can't believe he'd betray me like that..." she added accusingly, feeling the wretched tears start to fill her eyes again. "He PROMISED! That snake!" "He was only trying to help," Mamoru defended his friend gently. "Yeah, well he did a lousy job of it!" Usagi yelled, clenching her fists. "You were the LAST person he should've told!" "Who's there?!" This harsh bark came from neither of them, and Usagi clapped her hands over her mouth. "Kuso! Now we're gonna catch it," she muttered, looking around for an escape route before the cop appeared. Part of her was relieved, actually-it was the perfect distraction to escape this potentially mortifying situation-but the rest of her was terrified of getting caught. "We better get home before we get into real trouble," she muttered, turning to flee. "Ja ne!" Before she could take a step, however, a firm hand clamped around her arm, and she found herself being dragged from the path, back into the shadow of an ancient willow. "Nani...?" she began, but Mamoru's hand clamped over her mouth. "Shhh..." he hissed, breath drifting warmly past her ear and making her shiver. "Stay still until he passes." Usagi figured she'd better listen. Not that she had much of a choice. The way he was holding her-with her back pressed against his chest and one strong arm wrapped firmly around her waist, hand splayed across the soft material that covered her stomach-she'd have to put up quite a struggle to escape his grip. Besides...she had to admit that she rather liked being held like that... Mamoru felt her quick breaths coming against his hand and smiled, pleased that he was having such an affect on her. He slowly lowered his arm so that it now wrapped gently around her shoulders, embracing her fully. He heard her quick intake of breath and felt her heart pound against his arm. His own heart was dancing again... "Now," he murmured, softly nuzzling at her throat, "I'd say it's a good time for you to tell me what you want to tell me. You might as well," he hurriedly added when she stiffened, "because I'm going to keep pestering you until you give in. Although, I think I'm going to rather enjoy convincing you like this..." He smiled softly and raised his hand to brush a feather-light caress against the smooth, warm skin of her throat, right at the pulse-point, which leaped beneath his warm touch. She was out of his arms in a flash, breathing hard, standing a good three feet away from him, the low-hanging willow branches acting as a shield of sorts. He blinked, staring at her, eyes shadowed in confusion and a hint of uncertainty. She was afraid. He hadn't wanted to scare her. **What are you doing?!** he screamed at himself. **Attempting to seduce a fourteen-year-old girl who, up until now, has always considered you her WORST ENEMY?! No WONDER she's terrified!** But...did that mean Motoki had been wrong? Whatever his faults-as nosy as he was at times-he had never lied to Mamoru before. Besides, Usagi's own reaction proved that Motoki's words held some semblance of truth. Why else would she get so upset if it WASN'T true? Nevertheless, there she stood, shaken and afraid, and it was because of him. He suddenly felt very ashamed of himself, even as he longed to take her back into his arms. He was about to apologize, stammer some kind of excuse for his less-than-civilized behavior, and flee into the blackness in hopes that it might swallow him completely...but Usagi's small, quiet voice stilled him in his tracks. "Dame..." she whimpered, still trembling with the remembered warmth of his arms surrounding her, his breath hot against her neck. "Onegai...I-I'll tell you. Just stop..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tell me how to win your heart, for I haven't got a clue. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ She took a deep, steadying breath, mad at herself for giving in to his charms so easily. He was a sly one, that Mamoru was, using his overwhelming sensuality to weaken her will, and-curse him-it had worked wonderfully, too. "I don't see why I need to tell you anything," she muttered, keeping her back to him so he couldn't see her flushed face. "Motoki-baka took care of that job for me." "There's a big difference in hearing it from him and hearing it from you," he replied gently. "What difference? This way so you can laugh at me in person?" she snapped, before remembering to keep her voice down in case the cop reappeared again. She briefly considered screaming, deciding that she'd rather take her chances with a cop than stay and be humiliated, but then she realized that it wouldn't bode well for Mamoru if the cop got the wrong idea... She sighed as her shoulders slumped in defeat. "I don't recall telling you that I was going to laugh," Mamoru was saying softly. "Oh, please!! This is YOU we're talking about," she hissed. "When have you EVER NOT laughed at me?!" Before he could answer, she continued on ruthlessly, "If you wanna hear this then just shut up and listen! I'm only saying it once!" Surprisingly enough, he shut up. She stopped, blinking back tears, wondering where on earth to begin. "It...it was all your fault!" she finally blurted, deciding that defensive was the best way to go. She heard him take a breath to reply, but didn't give him the chance. "If you'd...if you hadn't helped that little boy in the park, I never would've changed my mind! A-and afterwards when you gave me the cone and didn't even make fun of me for spying on you... it just wasn't normal for you! It made me curious, so I started watching you, and soon I began to see that you WERE human, and not just some obnoxious college guy I couldn't stand being in the same room with. And you had a heart, and you were so nice to everyone-except for me until recently-and..." Once the words got flowing, she couldn't seem to stop them. They just seemed to escape of their own will. She could tell Mamoru was listening intently, and she closed her eyes while she talked, holding back tears. "You seemed so lonely," she admitted softly, and heard another quick intake of breath. "You and Motoki-sa... Motoki-baka..." (She was still mad at him, after all) "...are so close, but when you aren't with him you just seem so alone. It made me hurt to see you pushing everyone away from you, and I started wanting to help you feel better and make the darkness go away, only I knew you wouldn't let me anywhere near you, so it just got worse and...and finally I realized it hurt so much 'cause I'd fallen in love with you." She stopped, feeling herself tremble slightly with tension. Now came the part where Chiba Mamoru would collapse to the ground amid roars of hysterical laughter... There was absolute silence behind her. After a moment, she began to wonder if he was even still there. Ooooh...she'd absolutely MURDER him if he'd walked out in the middle of her litany, after all the torment he'd put her through to get her to admit it in the first place! Unless, of course, the shock of it had simply killed him... The slightest noise behind her, the softest release of breath, let her know that he was still there, and still very much alive. She gulped, sensing he was about to speak... and finally her nerves just couldn't take it anymore. She did the only logical thing she COULD do in that situation. She bolted. However, as fast as she was, he was faster. She didn't get more than two steps before a pair of strong, warm arms surrounded her and a soft, breathless voice asked laughingly, "Where are you going, Koishii? Don't you want to hear what I have to say?" "Iie! I'm not gonna stand here and..." She abruptly stopped as his words filtered through her dazed mind. Particularly one word. "K-koishii?" "Hai," he murmured, soft lips once again grazing her neck. "What else could I call you after this? Maybe Usako?" "U-usako?" she squeaked. In response, his arms tightened as he pressed a full, passionate kiss to her throat, and she jumped slightly, her lips parting on a gasp when his teeth nipped gently at her skin. "I like Usako better," he murmured against her shoulder. "It suits you. My Usako." She swallowed, trying to get her voice to start working again, but his closeness was wreaking havoc with her senses. "D-does this mean...you're not...mad?" she managed to squeak. "Mad?!" Soft, breathless laughter, and his arms withdrew from around her. She immediately missed their warmth, but then strong hands gripped her shoulders and gently turned her to face him, cupping her face and nudging her chin up when she refused to meet his gaze. His eyes were glowing with light as he regarded her, and the smile on his face was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. "Usako... how can I be mad when you've made me so happy?" he whispered. And then he lowered his head and met her lips in the softest of kisses, and immediately all feeling flooded from Usagi's legs. Mamoru seemed only too willing to catch her as she collapsed weakly against him, and he shamelessly used the opportunity to capture her lips in another kiss, one hand cradling her neck to keep her still as he eagerly ravished her aching mouth, seducing her with warm, soft lips and gentle touches until she trembled in his arms. Finally, after long, heady moments, he eased his kisses and pulled away just enough to watch her face. Her eyes were closed, lips swollen and rosy and so tempting to him... He raised his gaze from them as her lids slowly lifted, revealing dazed eyes that glittered with starlight when they met his own. "M-mamo-chan?" she whimpered, He pulled her back into his arms, pressing her head against his chest so that she could hear the swift thrumming of his heart, pressing his cheek against her hair. "Do you understand now?" he whispered, closing his own eyes as he smiled gently. "You've changed everything between us. I won't deny my feelings for you anymore." "Your...feelings?" He lifted his head, and she lifted hers to look at him as he tenderly traced the line of her face with his hand. "Hai," he whispered, his own eyes glittering, although it wasn't with starlight. "Usa-koishii...aishiteru." Her eyes widened as she stared at him. Then, with a smile as brilliant as the moon, she flung herself back into his arms and buried her face into his chest. "Aishiteru, Mamo-chan," she breathed. "Always...always..." She decided, as he bent to kiss her once again, that maybe she'd be willing to let Motoki-san live, after all... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ But let me start by saying I love you... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~Finish~~ **A Glossary of Japanese Terms** (Yes, I'm actually including a glossary this time. Amazing, ain't it? ;-) Douka shita no?---What's wrong? Hai---yes Iie---no Onii-san---older brother (Motoki-onii-san) Odango Atama---dumpling head Baka---stupid, idiot (Mamoru-baka. hee hee ^_~) Arigatou---thank you do Itashimashite-you're welcome Konnichi'wa---hello (daytime) Nani---what Naze---why Chigau---wrong, incorrect, "That isn't right" Demo---but Onegai---please Wakatta---I understand Kuso---damn or oh, heavens! Ja ne---see you later Gomen---I'm sorry Koishi---beloved, darling, wanted Aishiteru---I (truly) love you **Note** These are terms I've collected from several online resources (including other fanfics), and they are correct to the best of my knowledge. However, if you see I've used a term out of place, or it has a different meaning than I thought, then please feel free to correct me. The same goes with all of my other stories, as well. I want to be as accurate as possible, but considering I never spoke a word of Japanese in my life until now...well... Ahhh...yes. The disclaimers. Did you think I forgot about them? =) I do not own Sailor Moon. I never did own Sailor Moon. I never will own Sailor Moon. I wish I was Sailor Moon, if she gets a sweetie like Mamo-chan! Why aren't there men like that in the real world, I ask ya? I also do not own the song, "Hello" I'm not sure who does, but it isn't me. But I love this song and have been looking for an excuse to use it for a long time. MANY MANY MANY thanks go to Moonsong, who helped me greatly with editing this fic (and the last one I wrote, too). Arigatou! You're so great! =) And so are her stories (no matter what she tells you ) so go read them! Really! You'll love 'em! =)