04/13/2001
Well la di fucking da
One week.
That's all I want. One week where things go right, where nothing goes tits
up like this. Every fucking time my life starts to look ok, and things
are looking up, BAM! out of no where a bus hits me. This time my father
wakes me up at 3 AM to tell me that my grandmother died. So at work to
day, (I decide to show up in an effort to help out Bob) I'm stuck with
the most inconsiderate prick on the fucking planet, who actually bitched
at me when I told him there was no room for the shit that needed to be
put away. So I said "Fuck that" and decided I was going home as soon as
Bob got back to the store, 11 o'clock comes around, and Sean shows up because
we were going to try to get me over to the bank at 11 when Bob was back,
so that I'd have money for the weekend. Still no sign of Bob, so I explain
to Sean the situation. He calls Bob, asks to punch in early so I can go
home, Bob let's him. I try calling my mother, and get this: She can't give
me a ride home because she's having lunch with a friend. Oh yea: And she
can't give me one at 5 because she's eating dinner with her fucking step
daughter. People kept getting on my case about being pissed about how she
treated them, but here's why! I'm emotionally fragile, and need a ride
home so I can find out everything and figure out what's going on with the
funeral and everything, and she can't put off seeing John's kid for a fucking
hour? Of course not, that's too much to ask for a fucking kid that doesn't
have half the problems I do. Thankfully, when Sean heard the problem he
called his mother, who was nice enough to give me a ride. Sean, thank you
for doing so much for me today when all anyone else is offering is "I'm
sorry" yer my brother man, nothing is going to change that.
But
yea, visiting hours are tomorrow, and the service is Sunday, so Fred has
no weekend to see Liz. This is God's way of telling Fred "Get used to it,
oh yea, and no girl is ever going to fall in love with you, so deal" all
I want to do is get out of this fucking house, and no one can help me.
I need out for just a few hours so I can unwind. This sucks.
Lindsay,
I miss you, a lot. I wish you were here, I need someone to talk to to keep
me sane, most of all I wish you were here so that I could get a
hug.
Sean:
Thanks for everything today.
Kim:
I love you, and hope to see you next week.
Everyone
else: Sorry, I'm too tired and drained to write anymore individual ones,
please, sign the guestbook or e-mail me or something, just let me know
what's on your mind...
SIGN
DAMMIT!