There�s a feeling inside my stomach
It�s my heart, and it�s sinking
I want to tell you everything that I feel
But I can�t know what I�m thinking
It weighs down on me everyday
When I think about the men who have loved me

I don�t understand what I�m thinking
Or how my heart can love again
At least I know that when this is over
There�ll always be the memories of what has been
It was such a long time ago
And it seems to have been everyday of my life

I think about then:
How I loved him in the dark
In my bed, feeling his heart beat against my back
He loved me then, I felt it in my heart
Dancing in my room, while he whispered love songs in my ear
Held safe in the arms of the man who loved me

I think about how we only loved each other in the dark
The day brought arguments and fights
There were tears in the day
But we found solace in the nights
When we didn�t have to see each other
And we didn�t even have to talk

All I have now are those memories
The troubles of the day took over the comfort of the nights
Now I try to build new memories
We can love in the light, and I�m happier now without the fights
My mind has trouble getting used to this
Letting go of the man who loved me

My heart is all too eager to start again
Betraying my rational mind
How can I love you?
How can my heart be so blind?
It has experienced so much pain and sorrow
And is still willing to get hurt again

But when I think of you I smile
It doesn�t hurt me to think of now, only then
Now we have memories of snowflakes at midnight
And when we�re together it�s so easy not to think of what might have been
It�s easy to love again
When I�m held content in the arms of the man who loves me

12/18/01-12/22/01
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