Poetry

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So you thought to yourself "hey this site really is awesome.... cody wasn't lying to me!" and came to this section of my website... well its the best part so sit back and relax!!(and enjoy the poetry of course)

oh and just to note, if you go to studentcenter.org you will find most of these poems, i can't remember if i posted them all, so if you want to use them plz email me. not all of the poems have the most pleasant language, so i thought i would allow you to know that some of these were written after i had stayed up two to three days, so if you are offended by any of the content within the poems, i am truly sorry, i thought i would put them all up, no matter what.

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A night alone

over the rail, looking into the sea.
a young girl gazes forth relaxed as can be.
the midnight sky lays velvet and blue.
talking of dawn, and mornings dew.
off in the distance a star hovers low,
giving off a brilliant, shimmering glow.
the waters are covered by a misty fog.
and a stream is blocked by a newly chopped log.
the moon above is big and round,
and from here the celestial light is really quite sound.
i am amazed by this earth, and the beings within,
and from now to forever will it never give in.

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In My Waking Hours

in my waking hours,
i hear that voice.
sometimes i feel...
i have no choice.

am i a toy in the hands of another?
or am i lost, not to bother?
cause i can't move on,
the voice is simply gone.

this silence i fear,
is bringing near....
a path so unclear,
footsteps would be hard to hear.

but in the end i'll somehow get through.
but i don't really know what to do.
a cold turkey's repulsive,
so i'll be gone-osive

i've taken a step,
i simply don't fret.
so many pains,
so little gains,

but the stress of a girlfriend is finally gone,
i guess i must be boring... (yawn)
she doesn't even wanna talk to me,
lol my heart is filled with glee,

maybe she'll work on her life,
and figure out how to reduce her strife,
then she will accept the truth and do what is right,
i still don't want her to lose in her fight,

i care because i can,
i may get clonked with a frying pan.
but oh well i gave it a try,
no room to cry.

eaeaeaeaeaeaeaeahhhhh i fell,
hey there some hair gel
rababaahh time moves on
and she's gone

knock knock against the door,
i know... that carboard barrier is really poor,
but it keeps the cold in..
thought i'd say out eh,

thats what they all say,
but i'm not them,
i am me,
i am starting lots of controversy

so chhth "we're gonna need back up come on"
hey i think she may really be gone.
oh well, i can handle it.
i'll just be single for a little bit

then bing bang boom,
she'll want me back to escape her endless doom.
but i may have a girl,
she will have to wait.

yeah, she was special,
i think i may have... loved her,
but she left, i keep than unconfidential,
i'll move on, thats for sure.

whaaaa, i love this song,
i wanna dance,
but i'm too tired,
if i had a job, i'd be fired.

because i won't listen to authority,
follow myself and refuse the glory,
that shit's useless,
i don't wanna get caught up in stuck-upness.

so everyone follow me,
this is an endless trip with tons of glee,
and sometimes ya stop and say gee,
tomorrow i will be friekin` happy.

my woman is gone i told her not to come back,
i'm feeling hungry, so i'm eating a snack.

mmmm, clondike bar... best of its kind,
eat to many and it enlarges your behind,

this seems to be a dream, but truly is fate.
love is rekindled thru unimagineable hate,
the creavase has been filled,
by hands, so extreamly skilled.
and now the kindler is left with a hole,
buried deep inside the soul,
never-the-less life moves on,
even though a love is actually gone.
tears may fall,
some big, some small,
but time will proceed,
around me, people succeed.
long ago i lost myself,
i don't even laugh when i joke about an elf.
so i mended her pain,
i didn't lose or gain,
i'm still the same.
this poem is gettin lame.
so i will dissapear, fade away,
do some chores, sleep, wake up then start my day
but remember friends, life goes forward,
and our spirits can move sunwards,
just learn to let go,
i've found i don't feel so low.
but good-bye for now,
i raise my eye brow.
and leave.....

an undirected poem, makes sense... sorta

growing up means taking care of others,
growing up means joining as sisters and brothers,
being young is always easy,
laughing at things that are really cheesy.
but as they say, time moves on,
the awe of a kid we find soon is gone.
so we have to hold on to everything dear,
because we may befallen to fear.
so don't give up, press forward,
take the step, let your spirit travel sunward.
if you love your friend, cherish your foe,
then respect will come to you, the other looks low.
if you are gonna help someone, do it for nothing,
you'll definitly be recieving something,
not money, but definitely better than carbon dioxide
it is a respectable name, and a higher pride.
don't give in to anger or agression
instead act out of humbleness and compassion.
i too am a kid, i cherish all of my life,
the good... the bad, i serve and still recieve so much strife.
yet i still have most of my kiddish awe,
i kept it because of a dream, i can easily remember what i saw.
i saw hate, destruction, horrible things.
but there was somebody there, telling me its gonna be ok,
and that amidst the terror i must shine my light,
i must let my soul take flight.
to never let my spirit grow old,
and my life would more peacefully unfold.
so here i am, writing to you.
i'm reminded of all that happened then,
how it is now, and it weakens my knees.
i feel the energy flowing from the air to the trees.
this poems getting too long so i must go,
i gotta date(goin to the "show")

goode-bye love,
my most trusted friend,
thought she'd be there to the end,
I WAS WRONG,

why don't i get a break,
i sit and contemplate, i hate the world,
my nerves are gone so what the heck's going on
im lost, torn, the clock has turned the dial, ends coming near.

but as they say, you lose, then u gain,
what in the heck am i supposed to gain,
im losing the only thing i ever gave a damn about.
what the heck is there to gain... screw this crap.

HELP ME im falling apart,
i hate myself for losing heart,
no pain, no words, nothing could express the way i feel,
except the only thing there is...

the empty feeling, the tears behind my eyes,
the overwhelming stress, and unimaginable hate and resentment there lies
thats all i've felt since she started to change,
and she is too blind to see it, i just can't tell her

i hate tears, fear, and anger,
but that's all that's left,
no happiness,
only emptyness.

even now, as the tears flow,
they still don't know,
they still don't understand,
life is simply no longer bland.

i wanna die, but i won't pull the trigger,
that wouldn't make my self-control seem much bigger.
but i would be gone,
within the time of a yawn.

morbid world, life is unfair,
im sitting here wishing i had some hair,
but i don't, just got a haircut,
crap.

i give up, if thats what they want,
the door's wide open, they just gotta take the step,
and they're outta my life forever,
they'll be simply aquaintences,

holy crap what the hell am i saying,
i'm gonna die, my life is how i'm paying,
time cannot stop me now,
and i will forever wonder how

it was them and me,
now they're gone,
now i'm empty,
why am i not dead.

my face and chest are soaked in tears,
and my life is very, very unclear.
my head hurts so i'm gonna go,
i don't wanna be alone... good-bye

when we cease to love,
where do we go?
when we defeat all pain,
who gets hurt?
when we obliviate our emotions,
how do we feel?

i gave up on love a year ago,
downhill is were i went.
my nerves are dead,
i don't feel pain.
my emotions are fading,
i just don't care.

they say love carries on,
i never had such a long boring yawn.
no pain no gain,
i guess i'm lost,
to love is to lose,
i'm falling in an empty abyss.

as i part,
i lose more heart.
yet i can't give in to the cold.
because my time is now.
my purpose unclear,
the pathway is ever so sheer.

so back off ya'll,
leave me be,
like i said my pain is gone,
so why should i plea,
my heart is cold,
oh the joyous glee.

i said that i love,
but it was a lie,
sometimes i think,
im gonna die,
i can't feel, i don't care,
all i can do is, stop and stare.

when i walk through the halls,
at my prison called school,
i get called "fucker," "bitch", and "fool"
but those homosexuals can go screw themselves,
im not in this world,
i simply exist,

my mind is set,
music is the way,
it allows dance and things to portray.
sometimes some whore will call me gay,
so i flip them off,
get back to work,
and the teacher calls me and egotistical jerk,

but why should i care,
this is my life,
empty, pointless,
look theres a knife,
knifes are sharp,
so are my wits,
due to my emptyness i wann see some tits

so i'm gonna end this poem,
go write another,
more detached,
and more off-course,
but thats ok,
no one cares, good-bye

A DAY IN MY SHOO'S

i sit,
i shit,
i shave,
i shower.

but u'd better believe i don't cower,
emotions that i thought were dead,
came and kicked me in the back of my head,
(and i got the marks to prove it)

for the first time in years i felt pain in my body,
and then i had go run to the pody,
i pissed and i pissed, and i pissed some more,
walked out and saw this ugly, nasty, nappy whore,
flashing some guy, nasty chick,
i bet if u dropped her droores she'd have a dick

laughing again,
get on your nees,
pray for forgiveness,
then eat your green pea's

big mamma's in the house,
clean up ur act,
then make sure that ur testicles are still intact,
`cause when she kicked you u put on an act
looked like a rubber, twisted and shrivilled,
i think a tear actually dribbled.

god, this hall stinks,
mabey someones asshole had some nasty kinks,
ooh wait thats a stink bomb,
them sick lil, fuckers,
make me feel sick and really yuckers,

hahaha, the old bag full of shit, set on fire,
that is one thing i don't desire,
so sit back and laugh,
hey bitch, make some pop corn,
were gonna have a blast,

watch the gangsta's thumpin up the street,
trying to break with uncoordinated feet,
so i go show em up,
get a hella good headspin going,
then show em my butt,
they pull out a knife, i pull up my drawrs,
and i run like a bat outta hell. look at the colors.

beaner mobiles, whores on the corner,
why don't you just call me lil jack hornier,
cause this missle's ready, waiting to fire,
that dumbass lost his shoo under his bydammed tire,
look at him search,
he looks like learch

whoa, i feel good,
i'm playing the part of anti-gansta hood,
im a legend alone, no one can beat me,
i steal from the thiefs and give to..... me!
look at the faces, they are so full of shock,

oooh, ahhh the light just went out,
thats fuckin cool, without a dout,
if only i had a real hot lady,
i'd be pimpin it better than the real slim shady,
damn i'm good, and a smartass to boot.
look that gangsta just ripped off some loot.

here kitty kitty, u're gonna fly,
watch out for the pole,
not with your eye,
aaaahhhhh crap!
i did it again,
now im the dumb bitch in the dragons den,

i've been a naugty boy,
guess the world isn't my personal play toy,
ah well, fuck this shit,
i'm goin to bed,
good night.

this pisses me off,
my compassion is fading,
my anger is raging.

the days last forever,
and i grow even more clever.
but im lost in hate.

so i give up,
i've emptied my cup,
time for a refill.

into the day i go,
not much here to show,
just tension.

so go please,
let me be me,
and be filled with glee

i don't want pain,
i don't want anguish,
but screw all that, im pissed,

so give me a break,
i'll take a nap,
mabey then i won't feel like crap.

but for now just back away,
i'm stressed,
and i'm having a really bad day

don't expect me to smile,
don't expect me to frown,
just look for the blank stare

and stop messing with my head,
i wanna be dead,
then i wouldn't have to worry.

time limits are gay,
so is school,
mabey i AM young! thus a fool,

oh well, all's bad enough,
i'll just continue acting like im really tough,
so tomorrow will turn away,

give me my time,
i'll be better off,
but the times are changing,

and even now in my darkest hours,
feelings of rejoice seem to cower,
i feel empty

my pride exceeds my heart,
yet again i'm right back at the start,
giving all i have for things that don't even matter.

give me a reason,
as to why i should care,
all i get is a vancant, expressionless stare.

i'm losing my mind,
there is no control,
why am i here?

is there a plan?
or am i useless?
i honestly don't know.

so if i fail,
my ditch gets deeper,
i'm lost in my own damn stupidity,

i don't wanna try and care.
i don't wanna try and listen,
i don't wanna face tomorrow.

but the truth is, i will,
over and over and over again.
i'll be normal in time, can't tell just when.

so as time progresses,
in a meloncholy awe,
i'll press on.

fake a smile,
start the day,
and show that i follow MY way,

can you remember the times,
when we locked eyes,
those were the feelings that are so distant,

i want those,
not these hellish sensations,
my heart is not this way,

but the monster wants out,
and is tired of being hid,
today i snapped, thats what i did,

now the world will pay,
i've held back my hardest,
but this monster is unbelievable.

now i am confused,
hate, sorrow, emptyness.
i haven't felt like smiling.

but time is still proceeding,
my life is not,
i feel like a robot.

and so i go,
my mind, so slow,
giving my life such depressing flow.