the oddity lexicon
Talk talk: you were talking about what?
The random and unexplainable:
I'm tired... Tired of crap... tired of lies... tired of not being appreciated... tired of baby sitting... You kids go and fight amoungst yourselves... I'm going for a nap...
INSURANCE! HUH! WHAT IS GOOD FOR? ABOSOLUTLY NOTHING! HUH! SAY IT AGAIN! INSURANCE! HUH! WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR! (sung to the tune of "WAR" - Edwin Starr). I'm getting more bills that they did not pay... Like i'm not broke enough...
Beware the sneaky... They will lie to you to get their way... and they HAVE!
Lawn Care for Condoms was the original "Poe-Boy" story here, but what are some of the strange things that have been traded for someone to cut your grass? This weekend, it was 2 packs of smokes, a couple of 2 liter sodas, and Chinese food. Go Fig?
POTATO PROSTITUTES: Two little potatoes are standing on the street corner. One is a prostitute. How can you tell which one is the prostitute? Hold on..... You're gonna love it... It's the one with the little sticker that says "I - DA - HO"
"Those who know don't say, and those who say don't know." What does that mean?
�Old soldiers never die, they just fade away�� - Patton
"...and it looks like he faded again..." - Jess
At what point do we lose our minds as a society? Was it the invent of
sliced bread or just the interstate freeway system?
Well... Blah, blah... Mr. Darkish comes out and wants to know what is in for me, why would I go and poison someone's mind when I've had it done to me so many times before. Blah, blah... give a rodent's tukus about the affaires and
goings on of far flung flesh. Blah, blah... in my universe, I am far older
than I need to be and I am feeling the anger of this thing whether I want to
or not. Blah, blah... cheapened in hunkered wainment. Maybe Roy was right, "no good deed DOES go unpunished"... Blah, blah...
An M.R.I. is a very large machine that doctors and nurses put
you into take little electronic pictures of your guts and stuff. They slide
you in like you are a dead body slipping into a cement mixer. As you notice
the claw marks across the opening, you have an uneasy sense that this thing
may very well kill you. All is calm before it actually starts. Once started,
your ears are filled with the sound of electromagnets buzzing and banging all
about your private parts. It's enough to make your winkie tingle... The best
part was being pulled out and feeling a little like David Blaine sucessfully
pulling off the coolest trick ever. Wanna' go back in? You run screaming out
of the building in a stream of explicitives... party!
Version Of The Truth: Part IV
Deja vu is an interesting phenomenon. On the one hand, you�ve seen all this
before and in many different forms, so you are able to spot it when it happens
again. Yet, you have sympathy for the characters that are doomed to repeat their
mistakes of the past. Your lead actor has just became a supporting cast
member and the central villain is now the tragic hero again. �LIES! ALL LIES!�,
is heard from the wings but when you�ve seen the play before, you secretly hope
the cast doesn�t stick to the original script. As the performance draws to a
close, the critic is disappointed as the production ends the season with the
same performance as last year. Folks, the fat lady didn�t sing then, and she
ain�t singin� now, but them damn plates are still spinnin� and the dog and pony
just came back on stage... Me? Personally? I'm just happy to poop...
Thanksgiving with Friends with Turkeyzilla and Sausage Cake!
Doctor Barry said that peanut brittle would help my back... 'doubt it, but
probably worth a try...[GRIN] I ended up going to Beaumont Spinal Care and I can
tell this might just cost some serious cash... err... anybody got some serious cash?
Ah well, I was hooked up to some funky machines, one of which sent little bits of
voltage through me and made me fell a bit like one of those hotdog cookers we had
during the '70's. The other machine has a motor in the middle and bends on
both ends back and fourth. If they moved that motor down about six inches, they
could make a fortune [you figure it out...]
Did you back down? No, just down in my back... A nasty little slipped disk
has made me walk funny, tire easily, and unable to sleep at all. GOOD GOD this thing
hurts... I've got 3 prescriptions for it so somethings got to work...
Devil�s Diarrhea is some serious cold weather coffee. Black, no sugar,
no cream, thick and hot...
Older than dirt but smarter than fertilizer... 10/22/2003
From the land of myth and legend comes a fantasy creature along the lines
of a hobbit, unicorn or lockness monster. It's called a "comp-day". Some have seen
this fantastic creature. Others, such as myself have never spotted one.
Compensation. It's a silly little word. The kind of word you use when you
agree to do something and get something in return. If you never get something in
return, you feel the fool for agreeing to do anything in the first place. I still
think overall, that it goes back to balance. Good balances good, bad balances bad
and the universe chugs along. Personally, I think the good is a bit overdue at
this point.
Farggin' Carbuncles... They like hurt and are really disgusting...
really...
Coffee and Popcorn make for strange eating habits.
He entered the house. All was quiet but left undone. A sense of
incompletion to all matters lay at his feet as he puzzeled about looking
for clues. The air was off but the TV was on. There were half scratched
sentences on the note pad, but not one complete thought. "It's just one
attempt after an other." he said to himself. Why so much left undone? why
so much left incomplete? Was time a factor? Was there a rush that was
greater than the goal? But, there was a realization that it was not just
himself. It is his fate along with the rest of the free world. Perhaps,
it was ment to be left undone. Perhaps it's only undone in appearance.
Perhaps... Perhaps not...
"It's not always the destination, sometimes it's the journey..." - Alton Williams
Fried food on a Stick. It must be Fair time again...
"Why do you think that?" he said, "She has given no indication to me that she wants you
to go away."
"It's just a feeling. I'm usually wrong about these things but I get the feeling that she really
doesn't want us hanging out together and is going to tell you things that I just didn't do."
"You're paranoid, girl..."
"ha.. let's hope so..."
"Somehow, I doubt it", she said, turning her back to him as she had a dozen times.
"Really, doll... I'm not just making this up. I've changed. I'm not the childish, imature man-boy I used to be. That's all behind me now...".
She leans over close to him and glares angerly into his eyes. "When is the last time you washed dishes? When is the last time you bought some of your own food? When is the last time you paid your own bills?"
"But Hon, it's been a while since I've had to do any of those things... you know... c'mon..."
"That's what I mean." She said, "People shouldn't have to ask you to do a damn thing, asshole. You need to step up on your own -"
"But, I don't work that way, babe..."
"Yeah,BABE, that's the problem, now isn't it..."
A hard shell is his way of fending off the outside world. You can tell he's led a tough life and in part, this is what made him the way he is. He takes pride in his repulsive nature. The cruder the apperatis of his pleasure the happier he is. He says he doesn't care about himself and the world around him, but his actions speak different. He shows compassion when he thinks others are not looking.
"Kind and back": Is an act of kindness deserving of a reward? Some would say no, Kindness itself is made to be selfless, therefore you shouldn't expect any reward at all for any kind deeds. Now, seemingly logic might dictate that kindness is paid in kindness. It's a matter of balance. You helped me, so I want to help you. There is a trend that seems to state the prior in our society - an attitude of "Thanks for your help, now push-off! You're bothering me..."
In turn, this attitude creates it's own hostile environment that often stops those who once "helped" in their tracks. This is another spiral I guess...
"The Victim's Lament": Are you a victim? Does the world cause you problems or do you cause them yourself? Hmmm...
"Boozer's Lament": "Okay, there was this time, when we where drunk..." is how every story starts out... why?
Happiness is... A warm puppy? A sunny day? An Ice cold glass of milk? Being horribly miserable and someone being there to complain to?
Jenny says she came to visit Beaumont and the air was chunky... Sweet kid, raised in the country where is air is clean - she's just not used to the big city of Beaumont.
"Dude has NO FILTERS": This is in realtion to somebody you know who speaks their mind on any topic. Like people who talk about nipple wax at Chucky Cheese with 400 kids now staring at them...
"It's not Stalking If he's cute.": This is a quote off of the Oprah Winfre Show that really put a lot of life in perspective for me. I don't think that the girl who said it really understood the kind of social commentary she was making at the time, but I found it very profound and life changing... then again, I'm insane...
Oh, Soggy-Wet Princess...: Oh... you figure it out...
Why do towns flood? Because Water can make a Decision... I agree that a democratic society is a good thing but if you spend all your time talking about something and never actually do anything about it, time might just take care of it for you...
Watup-Foo! Fools and the people who know them...
The Website: Hobby, Therapy, or waste of time? Who knows... it's certainly not making money...
FRS-3: ALWAYS The Party Channel... when I first got into FRS [Family Radio Service, or those little cheap walkie-talkies that are becoming real popular.] Channel 3 was dead, but now it seems to be the channel of choice for all manor of cromagnons, each professing that this is their channel and theirs alone. MORONS...
the oddity lexicon: