tripten

TRIP TEN - DBX (Disarray in IN)

"Guess I've got that ol' travelin' bone... cause this feeling won't leave me alone..."

WHO:        Me
WHEN:      November 30th - December 3rd, 2002
WHERE:    Louisville, KY; Cincinnati, OH; Muncie, IN
WHAT:      That same fucking band...
WHY:         I missed Moo & missed being on the road... what better to remind me of both than some crazy ass DBX shows?

Well, here I bail on my own!!! That's exactly what I was thinking when I snapped that pic of myself above... "God, this is gonna be fucking weird!" I'd never bailed on my own before but I wasn't gonna let that stop me from seeing some shows. Very weird drive... :(   I tried to get Melissa to go but no avail. She lost that "traveling bone!" as CCR would say... or sing. Whatever. It was quite the fucking trip, many lessons learned!! When you're in the car by yourself and start talking to yourself for hours, you learn alot... or maybe it was those Anthony Robbins CDs that my Ma let me borrow so I'd have something to listen to... yep the folks knew about this trip but they thought Melissa was coming too. For all they knew, Melissa was with us every step of the way... NOT!!! I puss'd out quite a few times and kept pulling over to sleep... I kept glancing over to the passenger side, thinking I'd see lil Moo passed out. Nope... all I saw was her smiling face in a picture snapped with our friend Phil from a Skid Row show in '01... the plan? Sleep at a rest stop the first nite, spoil myself and get a room the second nite, then drive straight home after the 3rd nite, of course stopping to sleep somewhere along the way. You learn to be real thrifty on the road!
It wasn't a shock that I showed up... rather than the usual, "Oh DAMN YOU'RE NUTS!" line, I heard, "Oh, there she is... we were wondering when you'd show up..." Am I that predictable. I guess. The show was fucking HILARIOUS!!! I'm pissed at myself for not recording this one... it was the best nite! Instead I of course waited till the last nite to record and it wasn't the best one of the lot... The Urinal Mints opened, I'd heard them before outside in the parking lot of the Chicago show but never actually saw them before. Dear Lord, it was hilarious!! That sorta fucked up, chaotic and offensive punk band that only the north seems to be able to breed. You just don't find bands like that in the south. The Urinal Mints had this 7" split record for sale... the cover was a black & white artsy looking shot of a naked man from behind with a nice background. But then an obviously photoshopped picture of Pikachu was inserted up the guy's ass and the record was called, "Gerbling with Pikachu"... maybe it was because I'd been listening to Sam Kinison's "Leader of the Banned" cd along the way up, but I laughed so hard and swore I'd buy it the next nite. Brace yourself, it gets bad tomorrow... Brockie came out in a santa hat & beard, it was soon tossed off but the holiday spirit remained and it was passed around among the crowd. At one point he spilled beer all over his setlist and kicked it away, it landed in front of me. I didn't dare snag it, I'd seen way too many people get a beatdown for doing that shit! But there was a couple behind me and the guy grabbed it. Brockie noticed and said, "Hey man, I'm not done with that yet, sorry... tell you what tho, when I'm done you can have it, I'll give it right back to you!" the guy smiled, all happy that he'd be getting a setlist. Sometimes I wish I'd stared at him rather than Brockie during the next 3 minutes so I coulda seen just how quickly his face fell. Brockie took the setlist back then proceeded to jam it up under his kilt and scratch his nuts with it. I mean REALLY digging around down south for some treasure and narrating it the entire time... "Oh yeah, that feels much better!!"   He pulled the wet, soggy, nutbag-sweat covered mess from between his thighs and held it up... then he said, "HEY! Let's see if I can get a skid mark on it!!!" then he stuffs it up in his ass cheeks, makin sure the crowd saw him try to scrub out a winner. I looked at the guy and he's in shock. The crowd is SCREAMING laughing, I'm almost on the floor in stitches... he keeps digging at his ass with it, brings it back to show the crowd but oh, no skid marks!!! "DAMMIT!" he shouts, so then he blows his nose in it, leaving a sticky, snotty trail of booger all over it. Then he sticks it to the mic stand. You almost couldn't hear him talking cause the crowd was laughing so hard!!   See, THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT!!!! Then he looks back down at the guy and says, "Oh, I'm sorry, did you still want this?" and the guy shakes his head, "Nah, man... it's alright..." and Brockie answers, "Naw dude, are you sure, you can have it!" BWAHAHHH!!!!
After the show the camp found out my plans for the nite and offered to let me stay with them instead. Ah what the hell... but without Moo it was lonely!!! Went back to their place, they all bailed to a friend's house except for one of them who stuck around with me so we could get some waffle house... stuck around there for awhile, eventually went back upstairs and went to sleep. It was real fucking cold the next morning!!! I bundled up in many layers and bailed before everyone was all awake... had some driving to do! "See ya in a few hours!"
I called my friends back home to let them know I got in alright and was safe... they were all, "UGH don't wake me up, I don't fucking care!" YIKES!!! Normally they all bitched when I didn't call but now no one gives a fuck. Oh well... I'll call Ma!
I also called Moo a million times, but that's a given, eh?   Somewhere along I-75 I spotted one of those brown historical marker/landmark signs... "BIG BONE LICK STATE PARK" it screamed... I almost died laughing!!! On the way home from the DBX trip to Chicago/South Bend, Vance was saying to us there was a place somewhere in KY called "Big Bone Lick" but he wasn't sure where. We even went so low as to ask someone at a Taco Bell in KY if they knew where it was... the looks we got? You don't wanna know. But we never found it... but here it was!! I HAD TO STOP!! Not only did I stop but I videotaped it, snapped pictures and bought a bag full of souvineers, including a bumper sticker that's now proudly displayed on my car and a piece of much conversation. I got horribly lost on the way out tho, took me almost an hour to get out of there.   That sucked.
Speaking of SUCK... Cincinatti, WTF is this shit?!!? Pretty ghetto & scary but I was used to that by now. Once again no decent hotels near the venue so I went a few miles off the interstate. It was SOOO FUCKING COLD that nite!! I hit up my hotel, showered, unpacked, etc... then noticed it was snowing!!! I hadn't seen snow since my trip to Colorado and before that, not since I'd lived in Colorado... so I snapped pics of the shitty, brown snow in the parking lot. Yay!
Got to the venue, doors weren't opened but they were all loading shit in. I didn't feel right going inside since I wasn't supposed to be there so I shivered outside... hell, I was still sick from the remaining GWAR shows so I almost didn't feel how cold I was... plus I did have some of those hand warmers. One of them saw me outside and got all beligerant about my being outside so I went in. Armed with the camcorder, I decided THIS would be the nite I record. Until the venue security told me to get it the fuck outta there. Dammit. I sat around at one of the tables and looked around, all spaced out... called some friends. I shouldn't have eavesdropped but I heard a group of people behind me and one of them returned to the table from the bar commenting about the cheap drinks... "Only $3 for this!" I heard the guy say. WOW!!! $3 drinks?!!? I thought... HEAVEN!! There were 2 bands that went on before DBX and Urinal Mints... I think. I was so fucking drunk.... NEXT!!!!!