| TRIP SEVEN - GWAR |
 |
 |
| WHO: Moo & I (joined by Melissa, Butthole & Rob in Orlando/Tampa) WHEN: October 2nd - October 13th, 2002 WHERE: Myrtle Beach, SC; Charlotte, NC; Atlanta, GA; Tallahassee, FL; Orlando, FL; Tampa, FL; Jacksonville, FL; Ft. Myers, FL; Ft. Lauderdale, FL WHAT: Duh... WHY: Always ask "why not?" rather than why! We wanted to get front row every nite and walk away soaked in filth. This was only the beginning of our GWAR trips... Shit. How do I begin this one? We told our folks about this doozy since it was fairly local and the out of state shows were on the weekend... sorta. For a few days before this excursion I was fairly bummed out unlike the usual roadtrip high that starts weeks before. As I was buying more clothes, a hose, some face wash and other shit for our trip, I sluggishly pushed the buggie thru Walmart and barely looked at the aisles as I threw shit in and kept walking. Drove home wednesday nite to get Moo and we headed back to Orlando the same nite. We met Liann, a clerk at a Citgo by our folk's house in NPR who soon would cheer us on for all our trips. We'd come home and give her all the details and she'd applaud. "You girls are crazy!" she'd say, echoing that familiar phrase we'd soon hear every nite. Slept at my place for an hour or so then hit the road around 4am. I was so tired I couldn't even drive an hour so Moo took over till we got to Jacksonville... slept some more then finally hit the road and left FL a million hours later. South Carolina was a great nite, the first show we'd seen in eight months!!! In order to make it just like our first show in Jan. we even stood in the same spot along the barricade where we were in Orlando, just off center and to the left. The next few nites we'd go center but tonite we were feeling sentimental. So nerve-wracking! Our first GWAR show (Jan. in Orlando) was awesome but I of course still feared them. It was the ONLY show where we didn't wait around to try and meet whatever band we were going to see afterwards. "Nah, they're probably all a bunch of assholes, let's split!!!" and we snapped the "aftermath" pics in the parking lot then proceeded to Denny's without any desire to meet the real folks behind GWAR. Now we knew who they were and this was gonna be creepier than we imagined. Talked to this hot kid next to me, too bad he was Moo's age. Moo & I were freaking out, watching everything get set up, many of the folks walking around the stage getting shit together were still strangers to us, no one to make faces at or flip off! "OMG Moo... I'm going to freak out..." I was no stranger to freaking out at shows if I was excited enough. My first Cooper show, that story is legendary. I was all cheering and excited but too busy howling and smiling to be 'freaked out'. As soon as the curtain rose and everyone hit the stage but Cooper, we all went even more nuts. He was standing behind a white curtain up on the stage set and when the curtain dropped and he walked down the ramp right in front of me, I stopped dead and burst into tears, completely caught off guard. I continued to bawl thru most of the first song while my friends patted my back and laughed. Such an emotional moment, didn't know what to do! But anyway, I'm off topic and rambling again. Moo was to my right so her poor left arm fell victim to various scratch marks and a serious clawing as the showtime grew closer. "OMG Moo, OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!" "Jesus, you ass! You're hurting me, quit it!" Sorry Moo, I'm about to have a coniption here. I'd been waiting for this for AWHILE, especially after having the other 3 GWAR trips canned. The opening acts were Cattle Decapitation and Bloodlet, the first nite we didn't pay much attention, we didn't know of them or care at that time, all we knew was we'd have to "tolerate" them for 9 nites so we may as well get used to it! The house music stopped, the lights went down, omg. I never heard Moo or I scream so much in our lives like that first nite, jumping up and down, smiling at each other and slapping five, we were so fucking psyched. Total 180 tho, the first show I saw at that moment when they hit the stage, I cowered away in fear and my heart pounded, I know they are behind the barricade but dammit, this is GWAR, I've been scared of this band since I was a little girl and now they're right here. I was so scared I cheered a bit but kept my arms wrapped around my chest and held on during the first song. Not in S.C.... Moo and I were howling laughing, these weren't the same freaks we knew, were they? Just as long as the costumes stay on that side of the barricade, we'll be alright. The first body was dragged out and filleted, blood spurted and we felt that oh-so-familiar splash against our own bodies and knew it was showtime. Awww yeah, here we go again!!! I'm not going to describe the shows and whatnot otherwise I'd be repeating myself 14 times. But it was so awesome... we didn't get too wet that nite, from the waist up we were soaked but below? Not that bad... sorta disappointing but we knew we had more shots and we'd be in the center from then on out. After the show one of them let us backstage where we got to meet everyone else behind the 'GWAR camp'. Moo met her future punching bag... when Chuck's not around, Moo still needs someone to pick on to practice her "ego breakdown" routine. I guess the rule is the first nite she's nice... after that, if she sees a certain quality in you and thinks you can roll with her punches, then you're her bitch. And she's relentlessly insulting, cruel, scathing, keep adding adjectives here! But God bless her, she's so damn cute. (See solo picture above of her in N.C). I can't remember how long we were back there, long enough for everyone to realize Moo & I were nuts and we'd be around for the next 9 days? "I can't believe you girls..." we'd hear. Ha... if they thought THAT was bad... at this point, we didn't think we'd be going on anymore trips. But who the fuck were we kidding? I shoulda known we'd milk this tour all we could and try to get as much as possible. Normally after the shows we'd say hey for a moment to the 'slaves' when they were breaking down the set then we'd bail to the car, change into dry clothes then head back to say goodnite. It became very routine and we got real good at changing clothes in public in an efficient, private manner. (Until we got up north and didn't give a fuck and soon would be just pulling off our shit in front of crowds of people). But not this nite... we stood around in our wet, freezing clothes for probably 2 hours, however long we were back there after the show. Walking around outside, behind the stage, all over the place. Suddenly like a bullet I felt a horrible pain in my head and almost couldn't see. Probably the worst headache I'd ever had, I wanted to puke but started to cry like a 2-year-old instead. "OMG, I have a bad headache, we gotta go, goodnite!!" I quickly said as Moo & I retreated to the car. I could hardly even drive so I just pulled over to the first hotel we saw. The clerk behind the desk was awesome and gave me some tylenol PM, this "kit" with granola bars, tissues, other various items. Peeled off our blood clothes and flopped into bed, completely exhausted and in agony, but happy as fuck. NEXT!!! |
| "I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd, you're gonna hear my voice when I shout it out loud..." |