| June 23, 2002- On the 21st I recieved what I once believed would be my last chemo. Hopefully it will be my last, but we got some disturbing news the day before the chemo. Turns out that all those tests they did back in April weren't as conclusive as I was led to believe. Apparently they forgot to order a certain test to be done to my bone marrow. Now the normal test showed that I had no lymphoma involvement in my marrow any longer. But my first bone marrow biopsy had a test done which showed that genetically my cells are screwed up. Right now they hypothesize that this genetic deffect occured from a chemical exposure, other than that I haven't been given any specifics. Anyway, with my second bone marrow biopsy in april they didn't order the test to look at my genes, so we don't know if I'm still genetically flawed or not. If I am...then I haven't seen the last of chemotherapy. But I figure I'll just worry about that when I come to it. I mean, there's nothing I can do to change my genes at the moment so why dwell on it. However, I have to admit that thinking about having to go in for more chemotherapy when I was so happy about it finally being over does make me feel uneasy. I'm just so ready for this period in my life to end. Right now I'm just hoping that I'll be feeling better from this last chemo before my class on tuesday. I can hardly stand sitting in a room relearning calculus for 4 hours as it is, if I feel like crap at the same time I don't know how I'll be able to handle it. We haven't set up any dates for my follow up testing. It should be within the next three weeks. By the middle of July we should know whether or not I'll be needing any more chemo or not. So until then all I can really do is pray that things start looking up from here on out. Pray that this has all come to an end. |