Hold it now and watch the hoodwink
As I make you stop, think
You’ll think you’re looking at Aquaman
I summon fish to the dish
Although I like the Chalet Swiss
And I like the sushi ‘cause it’s never touched a frying pan
Hot like wasabe when I bust rhymes
Big like LeAnn Rimes
Because I’m all about value
Bert Kaempfert’s got the mad hits
You try to match wits, you try to hold me but I bust through
(Like Andrew Lloyd, I’ve got a big show
Mine’s about a Back-Hoe
They’ll be a big sound from the pavement)
Gonna make a break and take a fake
I’d like a stinkin’ achin’ shake
I like vanilla it’s the finest of the flavors
Gotta see the show, ‘cause then you’ll know
The vertigo is gonna grow
‘Cause it’s so dangerous
You’ll have to sign a waiver
How can I help it if I think you’re funny when you’re mad?
Tryin’ hard not to smile though I feel bad
I’m the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can’t understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of taking off my shirt
It’s been one week since you looked at me
Threw your arms in the air and said "You’re crazy"
Five days since you tackled me
I’ve still got the rugburns on both my knees
It’s been three days since the afternoon
You realized it’s not my fault not a moment too soon
Yesterday you’d forgiven me
And now I sit back and wait till you say you’re sorry
Chickity China the Chinese Chicken
Have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin’
Watchin’ X-files with no lights an
We’re da la maison
I hope the Smoking Man’s in this one
Like Harrison Ford I’m getting frantic
Like Sting, I’m tantric
Like Snickers guaranteed to satisfy
Like Kurasawa, I make mad films
‘Kay, I don’t make films
But if I did they’d have a Samurai
(Like Skywalker got a big hunch
Hey, that’s my lunch
Yoda’s a really, really old guy)
Gonna get a set a’ better clubs
Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs
Just so my irons aren’t always flying off the back-swing
Gotta get in tune with Sailor Moon
‘Cause the cartoon has got the boom anime babes
That makes me think the wrong thing
How can I help it if I think you’re funny when you’re mad?
Tryin’ hard not to smile though I feel bad
I’m the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can’t understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of taking off my shirt
It’s been one week since you looked at me
Dropped your arms to your sides and said "I’m sorry"
Five days since I laughed at you and said
"ou just did just what I thought you where gonna do"
Three days since the living room
We realized we’re both to blame but what could we do?
Yesterday you just smiled at me
‘Cause it’ll still be two days till we say we’re sorry
It’ll still be two days till we say we’re sorry
It’ll still be two days till we say we’re sorry
Birchmount Stadium home of the Robbie
(Original lyrics)