Elrohir huffed as he once again found himself on his back in the sand of the training ring. The elf that felled him laughed and sheathed his sword. Elrohir levered himself up off the ground and retrieved his own sword from across the ring. He kept his face turned away from the laughing elf as he crossed the sand, embarrassed at how fast he had lost the duel with the elder elf.

"I swear you get slower as each day passes half-elf!"

Elrohir grumbled as he cleaned his sword, intent on leaving the training grounds as soon as possible. His attempt was foiled as more elder soldiers came around to criticize his performance. Most of the barbs and jabs centered on his technique, which was much slower than that of the other elves. His only saving grace was that he was much more powerful than the others, and if he maneuvered his opponents into a position where his strength had the upper hand the other elf didn�t have a chance. However, it was more likely that the other�s lightning fast strikes and superior speed won the match.

He never stopped to think that his inability to best the other elves was due to his lack of age and experience. The young half-elf was only fifty years of age-barely past his majority a few short months back. The other elves treated him like any other member of the guard that had centuries of fighting experience, and Elrohir was beginning to think himself more than inadequate.

One of the guards came up behind the half-elf and pinched his sides. "No wonder he�s so slow! Feel all this fat!"

The guards then took turns harassing the young elf, pinching his sides, gut, and shoulders.

"Stop it you guys," Elrohir chuckled as he batted away their hands. He hid his pain at their words and actions with smiles and laughter.

*****************

Elrohir entered his room and flung his gear in the corner. He stripped off his soiled training gear and stood in front of the mirror. He slowly turned this way and that, touching himself and pulling at the �fat� that the other soldiers apparently saw. Anyone else looking at the young elf would have seen a young, strong male of two races. He was too lithe to be a human, yet too bulky to be an elf. Beautiful in his own way, he was a perfect, wonderful blend of both races. Elrohir did not see this. He saw shoulders that were much broader than that of his brethren. He saw a wide torso, bulky thighs, and hands that were nearly twice the size of his sparring partner�s.

A knock on the door startled him momentarily from his examination. "Elrohir? Tôren, are you ready for dinner?" came Elladan�s voice from beyond the door.

Elrohir looked at himself one more time in the mirror. He responded to his brother, "I�m not hungry �Dan."

*****************

A few months later, Elladan watched from the windows of the library as his brother practiced in the gardens. It was an off day for the soldiers, a day of rest from training. However, his brother pushed himself to the limit in the clearing of the garden, exercising himself into exhaustion as he had been doing so often lately.

"I worry for him, Ada," Elladan said as he returned to the reports he was reading. Whereas Elrohir had chosen the life of a warrior, Elladan had chosen the life of a scholar and healer. "He works himself too hard."

Elrond peered out the window where Elrohir was doing sit-ups. "He just wants to do well at his chosen occupation, pen-neth."

"I think it�s more than that." Elladan shook his head as he sorted through his papers.

The Lord of Imladris turned from the window and gazed at his worried son. "You would know better than I what your brother is feeling. You *are* the other half of his soul." The Lord grinned at Elladan�s grimace.

"That does not mean he opens his thoughts to me."

"If you are truly worried you should talk to him."

The young elf regarded his father as the Lord moved to the cluttered table to sort through various odds and ends. "If something is truly wrong," continued Elrond, "you can always come to me for help. I will always be there to support you both."

The peredhil nodded and made plans to visit his brother that night.

******************

Elladan knocked on Elrohir�s door with one hand while carrying a stacked tray in the other. He hoped his brother wasn�t busy, as he had not asked if the younger elf was free that night. He knocked two more times before he decided his brother must not be in. He turned to leave when the door abruptly opened. Elrohir stood draped in his robe, staring at Elladan in a rather annoyed manner.

"I thought maybe we could have dinner together tôren. I watched you practice all day, and I did not see you take refreshment even once."

Instead of inviting Elladan inside as expected, Elrohir continued to block the doorway and shook his head. "I am not hungry, Elladan."

As Elrohir started to shut the door, his brother shoved his foot inside, and he hurriedly stated, "I also wanted to talk to you about our promise."

Elrohir paused and regarded his brother. "Our promise?"

"The one we made each other on our majority night."

"I know what promise you speak of." They stood silently for a moment, Elrohir looking at the floor and tightening his robe around himself. Elladan tried to catch his brother�s eye. Elrohir opened the door slightly and gestured his brother inside.

Elladan entered and set the tray of food on the nearest table. Elrohir sat on the edge of his bed staring at his hands. His older brother sat beside him and tried to put his arm around him, but Elrohir leaned away and stood up.

"You have been avoiding me," stated Elladan quietly. "I just wondered�if we still stood on the same ground." He watched as his brother sat across the room in a different chair.

"Don�t Elladan."

"Don�t what Elrohir?" he demanded with a hint of anger in his voice. "I�ve been quiet while you have set me aside time and again these last months. You no longer talk to me. You do not want to spend time with me. The only thing you ever do is practice."

"I�m behind the other soldiers in training. I have to-"

"You have to remember that you also have an obligation to me."

Elrohir cast his eyes down, and Elladan went to kneel in front of his brother. "Do you remember the night of our majority?" he asked quietly, still not touching his brother. "Do you remember how desperate we were? How scared? Our promise-"

"-to be each other�s first when we were ready," finished Elrohir.

Elladan swallowed and placed his hands lightly on Elrohir�s thighs. "I�m ready, Elrohir. I�m ready for more than just touching each other like we did that night."

"Elladan�I can�t." Elrohir pushed his brother�s hands away.

Tears filled the elder twin�s eyes. "Is it because you are not ready, or because of me?"

"It�s not you, brother."

"Then why? What happened to our love?"

"I-I�m not worthy of you."

"How could you say that?"

Elrohir pulled away the robe and Elladan gasped. Elrohir flinched and covered himself up again. "What have you done to yourself, my heart?" Elladan whispered.

Elrohir pushed Elladan out of the way and fled to the balcony, he turned around and shouted, "I don�t need your criticism too, Elladan. Hearing how fat I am from the soldiers is enough!"

"Elrohir, what-"

"Don�t you think I know what I look like? I�m twice the size of the other warriors. I�m fat and slow. I can�t keep up with them during runs. They best me at every match-"

"Elrohir stop!" Elladan moved to the balcony and took his brother in his arms and just hugged him tightly for several minutes. Elrohir eventually relaxed and buried his head in his brother�s shoulder. "You are not fat," he whispered. "You are beautiful as you are. A peredhil." He pulled the robe from his younger half�s shoulder and traced the outline of bone through the stretched skin. Tears ran down his face as his hands ghosted over protruding ribs. "When was the last time you ate?"

Elrohir could not meet his brother�s gaze. "I don�t remember."

"Oh, �Ro." Elladan brought his brother into the bedroom and sat him on the bed. He brought over the soup from the tray, glad that he had chosen something light and not heavily seasoned. "Open up, tôren."

"�Dan�"

"Do this for me. Please."

Elrohir let tears roll down his cheeks as he accepted a spoonful of soup. Elladan fed his brother about half the bowl and stopped, not wanting to overwhelm his brother�s system since he had had no nourishment for so long.

For long minutes the twins sat on the edge of the bed and looked into each other�s eyes. "I love you, Elrohir," Elladan said passionately as his hands ran over the wasted frame. "You are beautiful to me. Fat or starving you would always be beautiful."

"Why am I different?" Elrohir asked quietly, resting his forehead on Elladan�s.

Elladan laughed quietly. "Neither of us will ever be like the others. We will forever be in limbo between human and elf." Elrohir sighed despondently, and Elladan continued quietly, "That is not a terrible thing, my heart. It is not a curse."

"How can it not be? I will never be match for the others. I can never be as fast or light on my feet."

"Elrohir, think about it. How did Ada become a great warrior if what you are saying is true? He is more human than we are, and he can still hold his own against any warrior in his ranks."

Elrohir blinked, considering this information. "I never thought of that."

"Maybe Ada can teach you his fighting techniques?"

Elrohir laughed quietly, if a little hysterically. "I cannot begin to think about how stupid I�ve been."

"Love, we are young. We do stupid things," Elladan touched Elrohir�s ribs again. "But this could have taken your life. We promised to always come to the other with our problems. Why did you not come to me, beloved."

"I didn�t want you to see me as they saw me. I thought if you knew what they were saying about me, you would believe it too. I couldn�t take the thought of you no longer desiring me."

"Don�t ever think I couldn�t desire you," Elladan said passionately as he leaned in to kiss his brother.

Elrohir returned the kiss gently, holding Elladan�s hands in his own. "Do you still want to-to do this? Even with�how I look?"

"You are beautiful."

Elladan bore his brother to the mattress, covering the skinny body with his own. This they had done many times before: touching, cuddling, and they had even gone as far as to take one another in there mouths. Tonight, however, Elladan suggested they go that last little bit to bind themselves together forever, as if the fact that they were two halves of the same soul didn�t already bind them together tighter than any other bond could.

"Are you ready?" whispered Elladan into his brother�s softly pointed ear.

Elrohir smiled and kissed his brother hard. "Ready when you are."

"My love, my brother�" Elladan spent what seemed like hours worshipping his brother�s body. Proving to him that he was desirable and gorgeous. He praised his delicate, yet sharp face, kissing every inch of available skin. He licked and tongued every dip and crevice in his brother�s neck and shoulders. Hands stained with ink trailed Elrohir�s torso, leaving behind heated skin and causing moans and small, strained whimpers to escape Elrohir�s mouth. As he moved lower, Elladan skipped over his brother�s hard member to lave his brother�s clenching hole. Elrohir cried out at the sensation, never having felt this wonderful sensation before. Elladan surged upward and rifled through his brother�s side table. He found what he was looking for: the oil his brother used for his weapons.

He straddled his brother�s legs and held himself poised over Elrohir�s erection. He oiled his finger and slid one inside of himself. Elrohir moaned and put his hand between his brother�s legs to feel Elladan�s fingers as they moved in and out of his own channel. Elrohir moaned and slid a finger in beside Elladan�s. Elladan bent over and rested his head on his twin�s shoulder as they continued to prepare him this way. It wasn�t long before Elrohir guided his member to Elladan�s entrance and the older twin eased himself downward. Elrohir fingered his brother�s stretched entrance, feeling the skin tighten and the hole twitch around his invading member. Slowly, Elladan seated himself completely. The pressed as close as possible, legs and arms entwined tightly. They moved slowly and lovingly, yet with a passion only the young possess. Elrohir found completion first with Elladan falling into release after him.

As they lay together in the aftermath, Elladan raised himself on his elbow to look down on beloved, now lover. He stroked Elrohir�s face and said quietly, "You will always be beautiful as you are."

~~~~~~